New Disney Film insensitive to adopted kids!!!

[shortbun]

Our family was born out of adoption. Adoption is
a very cool thing and we are mad at Disney!!!
Their latest movie-some movie about a Bear boy in
a band is advertising with a trailer where the
Bear boy asks "mom, am I adopted?" and his mother
answers "Of course not, dear!" like being adopted is
something shameful to do and be involved with.
This is not funny nor cute. Adoption should not be
associated with shame nor be labeled as something
a child should not want to be. I am actually disgusted
that my ds has to watch this trailer; it isall over TV right
now. Luckily, because it's summer, TV is only on in
our house in the morning. We're too busy to watch any
other time. I'm trying to find a link where I can complain
to Disney about their marketing of this film. In 30 seconds
they do much damage to the psyche of a young adopted
child over and over again. Adoption is a wonderful way
to become a family and Disney needs to be told about their
insensitive and unacceptable promotion of this film. Please
join me in boycotting this film.
mimi

[Tuffcookie]

Shortbun, You know something...Now that I think about it...YOU'RE RIGHT!!! What was Disney thinking when this film was released? From just the short clips of the movie I've seen, they do depict adoption as shameful!!!:(

TC:cool:

[Glinda]

Shortbun, I thought the same thing when I saw it. My youngest DS is adopted and when he commented on it I watched the trailer. They make it sound like being adopted is distasteful!
I'm surprised that Disney could be so insensitive. Needless to say we won't be seeing it anytime soon.:mad:

[snoopy]

Yikes! We saw the trailer to that when we went to go see Lilo and Stitch, and I didn't notice that was said. The movie looked like something I would avoid like the plaque anyway. I'm sorry your son had to see that, and I do not blame you one bit for having a complaint, shortbun! I hope you find the proper channels to go through to let them know they are wrong!

[Dan Murphy]

I have not seen the trailers, (did not pay attention in Lilo & Stitch, LOL), but certainly agree, Mimi, with you as you laid it out, insensitive to say the least. Here is a link for Disney addresses.

http://disboards.com/showthread.php?threadid=84539

[JasonLyons]

blah, balh, balh, balh ;)

[EROS]

Thanks for the info. We too have shared the joy in adopting a beautiful child. I'll write DISNEY as well.........

[Luckymommyx2]

We have adopted siblings and frequent the FRUA organization website. They have a whole thread pertaining to this movie and there seems to be a lot of people in the adoption world upset and disappointed with Disney--rightfully so!

[Blondie]

I haven't seen the trailer in question, but I can't imagine Disney doing something deliberately to upset adoptive parents or adopted children.

Is it possible that it was misinterpreted? :confused:

Can someone quote verbatim what was said besides the "mom, am I adopted?" and his mother answers "Of course not, dear!"

[Nikole]

Just a question.....don't you think that perhaps the comment is tongue in cheek considering "bear boy" is obviously an entirely different um..... species?

[pajamommy]

That's what I thought, too, Nikole. I guess I didn't think much of it until I saw this thread.

[dizneegirl]

I saw the trailer... I took it as the joke I'm sure it was meant to be. The bear is OBVIOUSLY adopted into the human family... don't think it's possible that he was born into it. :rolleyes:

[browneyes]

Trailer link (http://disney.go.com/disneypictures/countrybears/index.html)

[GEM]

I really don't see the problem with the movie at all. I went to see it with my cousins and their two adopted children. None of them were bothered by it in anyway. It's obviously a joke - I mean, he's a bear. He has fur. Of course he's adopted! What makes it funny is that he would even have to ask. The only families I could possibly see it as being insensetive to are those who have actually adopted bears.

[Buckalew]

I have to agree with Nikole and the others. It isn't like it is a little boy who is asking the question and his human mom answers in that way. It is a bear.
Sorry that it hurt you though. :(

[Luckymommyx2]

I'm not as upset over this movie as some I know but I still will not go out and see this movie. For a company that has such a strong influence on our children I'm surprised that Disney did not put more thought into this. For years there was such a stereotype/myth about adoption and how many were ashamed to even mention it. I would like to believe that we've overcome that but after seeing the trailer for the Country Bears, I wonder. I expect a little more out of Disney than a mother standing at the table obviously nervous and stammering that "of course not" after being asked if he (the bear) was adopted. I just hope that it doesn't send a wrong message to the younger adopted children out there that may see this movie. I, for one, am not ashamed that my children are adopted--we celebrate it!

[KerryD]

For those that were upset by the trailor, I would suggest seeing the movie before complaining. Dis is not going to take complaints about this issue very seriously if you haven't seen how this issue is handled in the ACTUAL movie.

[Luckymommyx2]

I'm not going to start debating or throwing flames, but this is a very sensitive topic and unless you have adopted (or have been adopted) you come across people that "just don't understand." I won't go see the movie mainly because I don't think it looks good at all! I understand people boycotting it and not going to "preview" because why support it if it is sending the wrong message? Isn't the trailer to the movie supposed to give us the overview and main message?? And I don't think Disney will take complaints about this movie seriously anyhow--they don't care!!

[Dan Murphy]

Well said, Luckymommyx2....twice. As an adoptive dad, I see the same points. And welcome to the DIS. :wave:

Dan

[Luckymommyx2]

Thanks Dan! I don't think anyone wants to start anything. I think we just want to share our feelings and if we get a little support along the way...even better!

Thanks again and take care! Congrats on being an adoptive dad! Aren't we the lucky ones?

[6_Time_Momma]

I guess I took it the same way as many others......that it was tongue in cheek as it was SOOOO obvious that he WAS adopted.

[KerryD]

Originally posted by Luckymommyx2
I'm not going to start debating or throwing flames, but this is a very sensitive topic and unless you have adopted (or have been adopted) you come across people that "just don't understand." I won't go see the movie mainly because I don't think it looks good at all! I understand people boycotting it and not going to "preview" because why support it if it is sending the wrong message? Isn't the trailer to the movie supposed to give us the overview and main message?? And I don't think Disney will take complaints about this movie seriously anyhow--they don't care!!


The only way you will know if this movie is sending the "wrong message" is to actually SEE it. How can you justify your stance on what this movies message is without actually seeing it?

[Luckymommyx2]

Okay, here we go again. It's not that it was sooo obvious that he was adopted. I think we're all intelligent enough to figure that one out! The problem is that the mom was defensive and nervous when the bear asked her if he was adopted!! It boils down to the reaction--the same myth that parents and kids should be ashamed of adoption!!! Disney tv just had a special on the show and showed some additional clips. The bear cub runs away to find "his own or real" family. (I forget the actual wording, sorry.) Is that tongue in cheek as well?

Can't we just be empathetic to those that are offended and not imply that we are just over-sensitive?? Unfortunately there will always be those that are adoption ignorant and we have to teach our children that they will run into these situations throughout their lives. I'd really like to put this thread to bed once and for all. There will always be different views on all subjects, this one being no exception.

I think it's time for me to hop off this merry-go-round because I'm getting dizzy going in circles!! (LOL's!!)

[Dan Murphy]

Said well again, Luckymommyx2. Now three times. :D I would add something, if I could, but you said it so well each time and fully agree with what you say.

[Luckymommyx2]

Thanks again Dan--it's nice to have someone in my corner! I hate to have to keep defending those who share in our opinion. Again, I don't know why this has to be debated (isn't there a seperate board for that?) because all it's doing is rubbing salt in our existing wounds. Actually, I have theories but that would start a whole new debate! (LOL) Hopefully we can just end it all here and enjoy a new thread that is a lot more positive and supportive! :)

[TheLionKing]

I have to agree that one should wait to see or hear about the whole movie before commenting about one scene that may be taken out of context.

What if at the end, the parents say something along the lines of " We were embarrassed to tell you about your adoptive status, but we have learned that there is nothing to be ashamed about being adoptive. You were as much a gift as our other child" or something to that affect?

Wouldn't you be praising the movie then for getting your point across to a much wider audience?

I agree there is nothing wrong with adoption. In fact, I think it is among one of the most selfless acts a person or couple can do.

I hope the movie does try to make that point.

[GEM]

Sorry, but you did ask people to join you in boycotting this movie. I think it's completely appropriate that those of us who feel differently be able to express our opinions as well.

[Luckymommyx2]

GEM, please tell me where I said for people to boycott this movie!!! I said I do not blame people that wish to do so, that's all. Like I said before everyone has their opinion but why would you want to further insult people that has already been hurt and I'm not talking about myself. It seems like you want to keep riding this merry-go-round. All I ask is that you carefully read what others have wrote to this point and be a little considerate. I've tried to be curtious to both sides but I guess some just don't see it that way.

[TheLionKing]

The original poster asked to join a boycott.

Although Luckymommyx2 you may feel some comments were directed your way, they may have been directed to the original poster.

Of course some do name you directly. Posters may mistakenly lumped you into the the call for a boycott that the original poster did. That was not fair.

[Luckymommyx2]

Thank you for pointing that out Lion King. I think this board has put me on the defensive when I never expected it to get so out of hand. My orginal intent was to say that I understand those that are offended by the trailer to the movie and why those who have adopted or been adopted took offense. I am in no means telling anyone to boycott the movie but I would understand anyone that does. Thanks!;)

PS...I hope too that Disney spins this into a positive adoption message-- it just comes back to that orginal trailer. I wish they would have just picked a different moment in the movie to use.

[TheLionKing]

I think most people can understand the concern a person might have from viewing the clip. Clearly those who are personally involved with adoptions are more sensitive to the issue. That is certainly understandable. It is certainly reasonable for those people to contact Disney with those concerns.

I think it is another thing to call for a boycott without knowing the complete context of the movie. We will know that when the complete movie is released.

[Luckymommyx2]

Well said! Has the movie been released yet? I thought it was but maybe not. I'm anxious to hear what both "sides" say about it when it comes out. Hopefully someone can post it here or start a new thread.

[DocRafiki]

I have no interest in this movie because it looks silly.

But I think you all are silly for judging it based on a line. I think (from the trailer I saw) that a major point of the movie winds up being that it is ok and that he's still family!

If there were a story teaching kids that racism is bad, there's probably going to be a scene where some kid is being racist! That's a part of the message. It would be closed-minded to think that the movie makers support racism based on seing one scene. :rolleyes:

[mickey4ver]

My grandson is adopted, and I'm not offended by this line, it seems to be in jest...i.e. he is a bear with lots of hair.

I think today everyone is over sensitive to everything that is said and done. I know there are cases of those people that are "uneducated" to issues in this world, but just ignore them, if you choose to see the movie, enjoy it for what it is.

Lilo and Stitch has been critizized for the way Bubbles as a social worker is, but I think the movie was done with a sense of realism and these situations do exist.

Congrats to all of you who have adopted and have given those special children a warm and loving family. I couldn't love my grandson any more than if he had been "born" biologically into our family.

There is a very nice post about this movie over on the rumors & news board, take a minute to read it.

[Claudia1]

I have only had 2 minutes to scan the posts but it is an interesting thread. Both of our children are adopted and our youngest can't wait to see the movie....... because of the trailer.

He really likes the end of it when the older brother screams, "That's not a bear, that's my brother!!!!". the Mom is also very, very upset that her little guy it gone.

Hmmmmm...... I see both sides to this. DD doesn't see that this relates to her and DS could care less. Maybe the movie will develope the theme a bit further.

In any case, I am completely aware that adoption is a touchy subject, especially with our DD, and that my opinion is just that... my opinion.

[Judy from Boise]

The only way you will know if this movie is sending the "wrong message" is to actually SEE it. How can you justify your stance on what this movies message is without actually seeing it?

I always agree with this no matter who is boycotting what !

Good fiction always shows the main characters progressing as people as they encounter various obstacles. I hope that this movie does a lot to promote the concept that loving families in any form are wonderful.

The way i interpeted the trailer is not that the Mom is ashamed or upset....just that she was mentally unprepared to answer the delicate question as she is serving dinner. Much like when children ask "where do babies come from" in front of dinner guests !:D

[AZKathy]

I am a mother of three wonderful adopted children. I feel truly blessed by the gifts of these children. Our children know they are adopted and have open relationships with their birthfamilies.

I honestly did not take offense to that scene mentioned. I thought it was way out EXTREME satirical humor where the mom was not expecting that question. I took some offense when the bear said he was out to look for his "real family" or something like that by himself. I honestly can't remember the exact words in that scene and only saw it on the Lilo and Stitch trailer. He goes out by himself without the support of his adoptive family....but I was judging it by those few short seconds on that trailer.

I think we should see the movie and then make our judgements on the whole movie vs. the trailer, IMHO. (Although, I will not fork out the money to see the silly movie in movie theatres; I will wait until it comes out on video)

[shortbun]

It has been said that many "just don't get it" about
the trailer. It's not like there are just a few of
us inflamed by the trailer. There are organizations
parent groups, adoption agencies
and book clubs asking for the general public to
become more sensitive to creating a family by
adoption. The days of telling your child he "was
not adopted" are over because they were not
emotionally sound. There are books written
about how insensitive and lacking information people
can be about adoption. This was an especially flagrant
example of how some people can see humor in other's
discomfort. Children of adoption often feel different and
here's a whole movie driving home that point BUT it's
Ok because in the end everyone loves the adopted
member of the family.(whiny sarcasm here) Big whoop!
Read "Adoption Is A Family Affair: What Relatives and
Friends Must Know", by Patricia Irwin Johnston, M.S. or
"Who Am I" a book for adolescents who were adopted
and maybe you'll get some insight into these issues. See
the whole movie, indeed! Take a walk in my son's shoes
and really get the message. Thanks for taking the time
to read this. I'm quite indignant as you can see!
mimi

[Pin Wizard]

I didn't care for that movie the first time I saw the trailer. It's one we're skipping.

[Jenzebelle]

My husband was adopted and he doesn't find it insulting or offensive at all.

We have no plans on seeing the movie because it's of no interest to us, but I personally find it a bit over the top to boycott a movie because of an obvious attempt at satire. It's just one line after all.

[Judy from Boise]

so because thousands of Southern baptists are boycotting Disney....the sheer number make them correct ?

How about the group who thought that The Lion King movie promoted homosexuality because Scar had a british accent ????


Because Jerry Falwell convienced many that the Teletubbies were evil...and Harry Potter promoted Satan......we should all boycott in sympathy ????


Intelligent people make up their own mind after weighing the evidence.......which in this case would include seeing the movie.

[MNT568]

I actually saw the movie this morning, I won tickets to a sneak preview from our local TV station. I initially had no interest in seeing this movie but when we won the tickets, I figure we might as well go. I actually enjoyed the movie. The trailer doesn't represent the whole movie. In a nutshell Disney is trying to say that all families are different and you don't have to look exactly like your mother, father or brother to belong to your family. The plot is that the young bear runs away because he thinks he is different but the parents don't see any difference between their two "sons", the young bear then trys to reunite the musical group The Country Bears, who end up fighting with each other and the young Bear tells them that familes stick to together and support each other no matter what, they ask him where he learned that and he says his father and he goes running home to his "parents" and then the Country Bears reunite and all live happily ever after. Throughout the movie people and bears are mixed together and no one seems to notice that there is any differences. I felt that Disney is trying to say you need to accept the differences in all types of people.

When I saw the trailer I never thought that the "adopted" comment would offend people, but then I do not have an adopted child. I do have a 4yo DS who is half Asian and does not resemble me in any way. (I am Irish, my deceased husband Asian). I am frequently asked what country I adopted my DS from. My DS does know that he looks different that I do and he was asked by another child on the playground if he was Chinese. I tell my DS that God made everyone special and different and that is what makes our world an interesting place to live. I don't think Disney ment to offend anyone I think they are trying to say accept the differences in others. Besides that one comment in the trailer there is only one other reference to adoption and that is when the brother shows the "baby pictures".

Well that is what I yook away from the movie today. I'd be interested to see if other think this as well. As an aside, my DS enjoyed the movie.

[epcotfan]

Originally posted by Nikole
Just a question.....don't you think that perhaps the comment is tongue in cheek considering "bear boy" is obviously an entirely different um..... species?

My thoughts too Nikole. Although I won't see this movie because it looks ridiculous and really doesn't pertain to the attraction I think one has to realize it is a comedy. I don't think any intentional harm was meant from that comment.

[gepetto]

I had to sit through Stuart Little 2 this week. I've done my time.

[JulesMom]

I took it as a joke, too...after all he is a bear and not a human.

[Mr.MouseFan]

Again, I don't know why this has to be debated (isn't there a seperate board for that?) because all it's doing is rubbing salt in our existing wounds.

Luckymommyx2- With all due respect, I don't see how having a differing opinion from your own would be "rubbing salt" in your "wounds".


I understand the point of view about what was said in the trailer, however, my own personal opinion is that it was all taken out of context. Personally, I think it's irresponsible to criticize an entire film based solely on it's trailer without seeing it in its entirety. Whether or not this movie is insensitive to adopted children is one issue. To draw a conclusion about a 90 minute film based on a 30 second preview is another issue all together.

[Dan Murphy]

Nicely said, Mimi. Additionally, I do not think Disney would ever intentionally, nor do I think any other socially responsible corporate entity would intentionally, do something knowing and with malintent to hurt or disparage any social entity, inclusive of the adoptive community. I do believe that sometimes companies make a faux pas, unknowingly, and unintentionally, sometimes even little ones.

[shortbun]

Thanks Dan! FYI Judy-I AM intelligent and I made my
decision without ANY of those other people you mention.
I merely mentioned others were irritated by this concept
so people would realize that a few of us here on
the DIS were not the only ones who noticed this.
I'm an independent thinker-for instance, I don't
think ALL people from Idaho are bad because of the
large number of mercenaries living there.:cool: Nor
should you consider me a raving fanatical football fan
just because I live in Columbus, Ohio. However, as one
who chose to parent via adoption, I think I am a pretty
good judge on lack of sensitivity in that arena. So, I'll
stick to my OWN independently formed-all by myself
opinion, thank you very much. I don't often follow the
crowd as a sheep and think those that do are basically
reprehensible. What I hate even more is when someone
messes with my child or calls ME stupid. This is my last
post on this link that I admittedly started and, silly me, I
had no idea that people would side with Disney over the
psyche of my young child. Thanks for listenin'.
mimi

[AMClvsMKY]

Just wanted to say that as an adopted "child" I didn't even think twice about it when I saw the preview in Lilo & Stitch.
It seems, going by the posts here, that the adopted "children" don't think much about it and it's more the parents of adopted children that are more concerned about it. ( which i'm not saying is wrong, it's great that you are concerned about your children's feelings)

[Nikole]

I had no idea that people would side with Disney over the psyche of my young child

I'm sorry but I don't know why I should side with you or the psyche of your child when I disagree with you. Just because I disagree with you doesn't mean that I always agree with Disney or that I'm siding with Disney.

I think some people are too sensitive on the subject and perhaps there are others that are insensitive. As the poster who actually saw the movie stated, there's a lot more to the movie and to showing who is family and that you don't HAVE to be biological children in order to be a part of the family.

Yes I feel some people over react. Sorry if you don't like my opinion but that is still my opinion. As for discussing this, if a poster puts up a post publically on the boards, the entire DIS community has their right to voice their opinion on it. You are not going to just get people who agree with you posting. THerefor, my suggestion is, if you don't think you'll like the responses, then maybe you should think twice before posting it.

I won't boycott something just because someone else finds it offensive. I'll judge for myself if I think it is offensive. I have plenty of friends who were adopted and I sincerely doubt they have the least bit of problem with that line and that they would support the overall message of the movie. Personally, I don't think people view adoption the way they did 20 years ago. Yes it was "taboo" to talk about back then. These days, I truly don't believe most people care. Yes kids might tease but let's face it kids can be cruel to other kids. If you run into a lot of people who look down on an adopted child, consider the source. We can't protect everyone from everything. Yes we can try our best to educate the uneducated and voice our opinions. However, you also can't expect people to always agree with you on every thing.

[TheLionKing]

Originally posted by shortbun
However, as one
who chose to parent via adoption, I think I am a pretty
good judge on lack of sensitivity in that arena. So, I'll
stick to my OWN independently formed-all by myself
opinion, thank you very much. I don't often follow the
crowd as a sheep and think those that do are basically
reprehensible. mimi

By calling for joining a boycott, aren't you contradicting yourself?

You are asking others to "blindly" follow your instructions rather than make up their own minds.

This is where my confusion is created.

[Bob O]

This isnt meant to insult anybody personally but the idea of boycotting the movie over adoption is one of the dumbest ideas have read in along time. Nothing in the movie is based at all on reality, unless we adopt bears and put human clothes on them and make them members of our family. I can see not seeing the movie because the whole premise is dumb IMHO and has shown disney sinking to a even lower level of creativity!!!
Any body who would boycott the movie over adoption IMHO needs to get a life and start to concern themselves with the real troubles that exist and not something based on humans wearing bear costumes!!!

[Blondie]

unless we adopt bears and put human clothes on them and make them members of our family

LOL Bob! I guess it could be worse.....could be sheep! :earseek:

[POLLY ANN]

I just received sneak preview passes to go see this movie tomorrow night. I will be going to see it and I will be bringing my 5yo dd with me.

I see both sides of everyone's opinion, but I think in order for me to make a final judgment I will have to view the movie myself. I'll let you all know what I think.

[LucyStorm]

Since I just replied to the other thread on this issue, please see my comments there. They are long, so I won't bore you with a repost.

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=2087408#post2087408

[ennazus]

I don't think one has to wait until they see the movie to make a decision about the trailer. The trailer was offensive, imo. I thought that immediately when I saw it. And I'm not especially sensative to adoption issues, meaning I wasn't adopted nor have I adopted.

If I find a food commercial that was offensive, I don't have to try the food to see if I like it. The good taste of the food would not nullify the fact that the commercial was in poor taste.

How many children are going to see JUST the commercial? I suspect a whole lot more than those who go to see the movie.

[dizneenut]

don't you think that perhaps the comment is tongue in cheek considering "bear boy" is obviously an entirely different um..... species?

My thoughts exactly. I don't think they are trying to be insensitive to adoption at all.

[mickey4ver]

LucyStorm had an excellent post, with even a "professional" touch to it, she has lived it, studied it and analzyed it. Very nice Lucy.

I agree, we can make or break how our children perceive things just by our own attitude about issues. Maybe if adults didn't overreact to things, the children wouldn't either.

Again, JMHO.

[goofygirl]

Its a MOVIE, its a fantasy! Lighten up! :rolleyes:


I hate political correctness, and the people who prepetuate it just irritate me to no end!

[goofygirl]

Any body who would boycott the movie over adoption IMHO needs to get a life and start to concern themselves with the real troubles that exist and not something based on humans wearing bear costumes!!!

OMG, I actually agree with Bob O on something! What has this world come to? ;)

[DVC-Don]

I am also an adopted "child", but I just pasted 50 yo. Anyway, I never even thought that the trailer was making fun of me. It is a comedy about humans rasing a bear, lighten up.

[perdidobay]

I don't remember who, but someone here on the dis has a tag line that reads
" Blessed are the flexible, for they will never be bent out of shape"
I like that:D
may we all be more flexible.......:)

[jfulcer]

I can see how some people would be offended by the comment, and I agree that everyone should form their own opinons. Of course, I don't have an adopted child, so I don't have that viewpoint to see it from.

One of the movies that everyone has been comparing it against is Lilo & Stitch, which of course teaches Ohana - Stitch can be a part of the family even though he is different. So both movies portray being different and that's ok cause you still can be part of a family.

But why is everyone NOT up in arms because the Bear "Runs Away" to find his family?
Why is everyone not up in arms that Lilo is obviously too young to be on her own, yet is left that way by Nani repeatedly?
Why is everyone not up in arms that Randall from Monsters Inc wants to kidnap and hurt children with his scream extractor?
Why is everyone not up in arms that Gaston is pigish towards Belle and takes it as far as attempting to kill Belle's love? I can come up with other examples. My point is that with so many other subtle negative messages that the movies send to us, getting upset at Disney for using grossly exaggerated humor to express a point is the last thing on my list.