PDA

View Full Version : Bad Neighbors


livie1205
09-13-2008, 02:51 PM
:mad: wHAT DO YOU DO ABOUT BAD NEIGHBORS? There is this weird family that moved in across from us about a year ago...well the dad stays home and the mom works (not the weird part)but all he does all day is drink beer and drive back and forth to and from the store....he has been harassing us for a while tailgaiting me,putting poop in our mailbox (he did the same to our neighbor and they saw them do it) ect...he called my dh work to complain (dh is LEO) that our son goes to a good school out of our area (we applied for movement at school board and got approved) and his son was denied and has to go to a not so good school and that my husband did not help him dig a ditch yeh dig a ditch...lol after working all night...said he is the youngest man in neighborhood and didnt help! LIKE HE HAS TO HELP HIM lol they told him not a work issue...but he has been waiting till I leave the drivway and getting right on my butt and following! I think he is a little wacko! What would you do?I did make a report about the poop thing already...

Poohbug
09-13-2008, 03:01 PM
I saw something like this on a news show. A bad neighbor was leaving poop on people's doorsteps. They got him on tape, posted it on the internet and spread the word. Neighbor was embarrassed enough without involving the law.

livie1205
09-13-2008, 03:15 PM
no I normally would not first involve the law BUT he is calling my dh work with just STUPID stuff like "he would help me dig" or "he got his son in a better school" and even though my dh cant get in trouble......it is a pain.The bad part of his job is when someone gets mad at you the first thing they do is play the job card! We both have ex spouses that tried the same mess (his stopped after she got a LEO like job) and my ex stopped after they told his STOP USING US TO HARASS THEM ! :headache:

deedeetoo
09-13-2008, 03:58 PM
What is LEO? I don't understand the whole job thing reference.

If I was being harassed like this I would call the police. I would also look into getting a restraining order.

cinnamon-sugah
09-13-2008, 04:02 PM
LEO is Law Enforcement Officer. Some departments are ridiculous about people who call in to complain about officers. My DH is LEO and luckily his department takes that kind of thing with a grain of salt. Sounds like neighbor is trying to get him in trouble at work. OP, make sure DH's CO is aware of the situation so he won't be blindsided if this gets worse. :grouphug:

Edit- If he's following you after drinking, I'd call and report that as well so they can get him off the streets!

Nanu57v
09-13-2008, 04:03 PM
LEO could be "law enforcement officer."

I'd contact police for guidance.

livie1205
09-13-2008, 04:10 PM
oh yes, he wrote a memo telling about the harassment...and his bosses know and like him, he has been there for years.When you are a cop people think that is a way of getting back at you or revenge.They know that this happens alot.It is just a pain to deal with.I think you should get in big trouble for making false reports or STUPID ONES lol They cant make him help someone dig a ditch just because hes a cop...that is just crazy....and the reason my son goes to a dif school is because my ex lives on one side of town and I live on another so he goes to a school in the middle.I had to go to court to do this and file a request with the school board and they said ok...he is just mad because he didnt know he could file for change of school and we did.

JimmyPicker
09-13-2008, 05:28 PM
Geez, OP, I thought when I opened this thread that it would be about someone who never cuts the grass and lets their trash blow into your yard or something.

But these are major issues! I don't know what to tell you, but I wish you luck. Hopefully the bad neighbors will move so they can get their son into a better school and you won't have to worry about it anymore.

livie1205
09-13-2008, 06:36 PM
yeh lol I do not make it my buisness what my neighbors are doing...we are not nosy and I hate when people think they can tell grown adults what to do...I just figure this guy does not anything to do all day so he needs to be a busy body and a little looney! lol If this keeps up we are going to make a formal complaint...I will not be held captive in my own home...we built our house here 4 yrs ago,he moved in a year ago and has caused problems ever since,

Narnia
09-13-2008, 08:27 PM
I live next to some wonderful people!. One has a great guy how she knew was a drug addict but still let him whatch the kids. He's broken into our house once and was caught once. He has stollen my Dh's nintendo ds out of the van when he was acting like he was helping him( dh is disabled and figured he was being nice). He has numerous arrest warrents and the police has bashed down the door last month ( they have came by with 6 crusers often!)she claims he was arrested but he was down town last week!
We have another who is a foster parent so she thinks she can call facs us about wierd things like my kids double riding ther bikes( I will take thier bikes away if I was to see this) , my 8 year old refused to wear snow pants on a cold but not snowy day. Once I think it was my ex( since the calls were about My DH and he hates him) or a grouchy person who didn't like my kids called often about things that couldn't possibly happen like DH throw my son in the van. My dh has troubles even lifting his fork he's not strong enough to lift our 10lb dog even! People seem to phone facs for stupid things and when it's really needed the workers are so backed up it takes too long to get the kids help.

pikafreaks
09-13-2008, 09:25 PM
I have no advice, but my neighbors are so bad they were on Dr. Phil!
(I saw my house though...~LOL~)

roliepolieoliefan
09-13-2008, 10:11 PM
I have no advice, but my neighbors are so bad they were on Dr. Phil!
(I saw my house though...~LOL~)

Is that the 2 woman that were just on there recently? One called the police on the other like 150 times.

ALittleDisneyFan
09-13-2008, 10:17 PM
Wow. When I got to the poop part, I just HAD to read this to my DH!

Two words...

Restraining Order

It's obvious this guy is a bit on the loony side, and honestly, I'd be concerned for my safety.. Do you have children? I would be concerned for them too.

pikafreaks
09-13-2008, 10:37 PM
Is that the 2 woman that were just on there recently? One called the police on the other like 150 times.

Thank God NO!

Those people were really nuts!!!!!

moredisneyplease
09-14-2008, 03:49 AM
Personally i would start documenting everything!!!! Every tailgate, every poop, ever harassing phone call........build the evidence just in case something "worse" does happen at least you have all of the facts as to when things happened and what you did to rectify the matter.

As for the tailgating, here's my suggestion: the moment he pulls in close behind you, pull over and let him pass.....simple as that. See what he does.

Suggestion for the poop: take pictures and document as evidence

phone calls: take detailed notes

Good luck!!

McKelly
09-14-2008, 08:25 AM
Well, if he has been drinking beer all day, how about letting one of the LEO know when he leaves his house, if they follow him, something might happen with his driving (cross the center line, do a rolling stop, five over the speed limit, etc.)and if they smell it............

karliebug
09-14-2008, 08:29 AM
This person sounds mentally ill, not just a bad neighbor. I agree with PP to document everything and possibly get a restraining order against him if possible.

okeydokey
09-14-2008, 03:11 PM
I think the mailbox thing is a federal offense and can get him into serious trouble.

pinktink83
09-14-2008, 03:32 PM
Why doesnt your husband file reports or get a restraining order? Seems like he'd be able to find some loophole...

livie1205
09-14-2008, 03:51 PM
he does not want to seem like he is using his job to make reports on someone..we are trying to be good neighbors,not make the trouble worse.It looks like I am going to have to start making reports when he continues doing this...he waits until my dh is at work to follow us in the car and we dont stay up all night to take a photo of him messing with the mailbox....the reason we know he did it is because.....
One day my neighbors son (good neighbor next door) was in his yard and the mans wife drives by and stops,throws a bag of poop in the yard and says to him "your dad know what this is for":confused3 he had no clue...well he called my dh and he told him to call and make a report because he didnt want to be involved in a neighborhood thing so he did and they went to his house to talk to him...well he must have thought MY dh called them and the next day...wham! poop bomb...it was gross! one day I went into the yard with my dd2 and I heard someone yell witch well with a B and I looked around and I saw him standing in the yard by his house (across the road) no one else was home on our road, it was middle of the day...I have NO CLUE what this guys issue is...when they first moved in my kids went to there house to play and their son would not let them touch any of his toys and got mad at them because they did not want to play what he wanted the whole time and told his dad so he called my kids little b's kids without father word! my dh called him and cussed him out! went nuts! so we have not even looked his way in over a year!His son NEVER ever leaves their yard which has a 8 foot fence around it and has a chain on it.They moved here from Illinois (sp?) I think.Is this crazy or what?This is not a run down neighborhood...nice house,nice area..weird

wndrlandcat
09-14-2008, 08:18 PM
It's all about documentation, get security cameras(we got some from sams club) that you can hook up to your computer to record, focus them in on your driveway, mail box and front door etc. When he's tailgateing snap a pic with your cell phone, keep track of any phone calls with your caller id. Then take all of your info to the "appropriate people". Good luck and stay safe.

mays
09-14-2008, 08:36 PM
Dear Original Poster,

My heart goes out to you. We too had this happen to us, with what started out as just odd, strange behavior, turned out to be very violent. We had local LEO involved but when you live in the big city with a murder a day, a person harrassing us, tampering with the mailbox, escalating threats and bad behavior... In the beginning everyone that knew about it laughed or thought it was a joke....even the LEO told us to grow up and not call them (including a day when he was on our deck with a steak knife cutting the screen to get into my house) (I was on the other side of a locked, bolted sliding glass door and the LEO said didn't see him do it ma'am) After that we got a security camera for the front and back of our house just to keep an eye on OUR PROPERTY noone else(got them on the internet set up to an old vcr). We were able to prove he was setting his poop on fire on my property.. reading our mail...

We wera able to get a Peace Warrant, and unfortunately through the work of others in the neighborhood worked with the mental authorities to have him committed.

Be safe.. We stayed in the situation for too long, and looking back on it now, with we had done more early on, including pushed the LEO for assistance, and moved. The day he was committed he attempted to assault my DM and DH along with a neighbor's child with his vehicle and then a metal pipe... What seems pretty annoying now can turn in a minute, so please be safe.

Grendalynn
09-14-2008, 09:57 PM
I can relate! :surfweb: We have a neighbor, who tried letting himself into our house in the middle of a black out/windstorm at 2 AM! The weirdest hing is that he only had boxer shorts on! Mind you we had 20 feet of snow at tha point and it was waaaay below freezing with the wind chill... I posted about this last Ferbruary... it was very scary!! No lights, no phone, no nuttin and here was this dude in his draws trying to push his way into our home! :scared1: Very Scary! Sounded like a Dateline story at the time. A life changing experience for sure - we knew all of our neighbors until they moved in that November. We found out the next day from the police officer that he was actually a Skitophrenic.... whats that old saying, "Love thy Neighbor?" Not so much in our case!

I say call the police, document everythng and take pictures if needed. This guys sounds like he is a few sandwiches short of a picnic!?

firstadventure
09-15-2008, 09:37 AM
I'm sorry you're going thru this. I think if he were following me every time I left the house, I'd probably start calling the police and reporting a drunk driver. Or tell them what he's doing and that you don't feel safe. I can't imagine they would ignore that.

And I thought I had a creepy neighbor! Apparently yours is worse...he's actually a stalker. Yikes! Be careful. :scared1:

jboysen
09-15-2008, 10:50 AM
This may not quite be the way to go, especially with kids in the car. Do you have good insurance? When he's tailgating you, I'd just slam on the breaks and let him hit you. If he's been drinking they'll bust him for it. Make sure to have your cell phone ready to call a LEO and tell them he's quite erratic and to send some one right away. Like I said may not be the best way, but it could get him for the drinking and driving.

pinktink83
09-15-2008, 11:59 AM
I think this is past "we just want to be good neighbors"...letting behavior like this slide is not only endangering your family, but those around you in the community. A police officer should know that. If you have the proof, then no one will say he is taking advantage if his job, or at least no one who matters. This guys sounds dangerous, and complaining to each other doesn't solve anything. Your neighborhood needs to come together and make some formal complaints against this guy before someone gets hurt. It is your civil responsibility, even more so since your husband is an officer. Don't wait "until next time" or "if he keeps doings it". He has ALREADY done it and needs to be held accountable for his actions. Plus, I'm sure you know that having one complaint isnt going to be enough. You're going to need a history on this guy when push comes to shove. Don't wait until its too late.

rluey29
09-15-2008, 01:17 PM
OMG I feel your pain. When we moved here 1.5 years ago, my husband had just started a teaching job and we moved in around quite a few other teachers. We didn't personally know any of them yet but thought the neighborhood would be great because of that fact. WRONG! We happen to live next door to a high school teacher who is a single mom with two of the worst acting kids I've ever seen.

Her boys are 14 and 18. They have shot fireworks at our house, thrown stuff into our yard, called my mother a B***H just because she stepped into my back yard to play with my son and told her she better go back inside, walked up and down the street in front of our home cussing at the top of their lungs, throwing their cigarette butts into our yard...they also pick out smaller kids from the neighborhood and harrass them and chase them as they're walking down the street. Their mom is acred of them because they've pulled knives on her so she buys them groceries and leaves the house on the weekends so that them and their friends can have a hang out spot. I've seen about 10 boys AND girls stay the night over there and the next morning they would all be in the backyard yelling, huffing gas from gas cans, and once I saw them torturing a chicken!

We were at home recently and I heard a bunch of racket and they had jumped our fence and dragged our son's trampoline over to the fence and were jumping back and forth from our trampoline to theirs. My DH went out and screamed at them to get out of our yard. They cussed and threatened him so I finally called the cops. The cop came and told me in a frank way that I should find a way to be nice to them because the last neighbor that called the cops, who lived at our house prior to us moving in, woke up the next morning to find their house spray painted! These kids are in and out of jail and juvenile and I still don't know what to do about them!

melancholywings
09-15-2008, 01:58 PM
If you don't already, I'd get a medium sized dog. Ours has done a fantastic job at waking me when we've had prowlers, and chasing strangers away.
This person does not sound well, and like any bully they are most likely only going to get worse. I'd also install cameras to catch the behavior on tape, then take it to LEO. If they are renting I'd drag the home owners into it.

scottsod
09-15-2008, 06:55 PM
we have a bad neighbor we live in a an apt bldg and our downstairs guy
a single guy in his late 50s who lived here as a kid and moved away and then moved back a year or 2 ago
he would call us and complain about noise when we were all asleep
so i got a new bed and frame and it seemed to go away
then as we had more kids he complains about noise all the time
called cursing on the phone would always say it was me not the kids
as my kids are handicaped and he dosnt wana look like a jerk that he is

he would call at 7 pm or so and i was like listen were just living here not making excess noise so he comes to the door several times one time brings our building secuity sayin im banging on the floor well there was a guy 1 floor up renovating and i heard the banging we all go up there ring his bell and hes got a hammer and tool belt im like there u go leave me alone

so next he calls the town and complains im running a biz in the apt and wants to get me evicted

we take him to court i had called cops every time he called me i change my phone # he bangs on the ceiling etc etc
court wouldnt hear it 1st we went for mediation he agreed not to bother us
lasted a month or 2 he started again i tried to leave him alone

one day he called dyfs childrens welfare on us said kids were yelled at and hit they investiagted and left we took him back to court they sent us to mediation again he stayed away for a few again

then he passses me at the door and yells and spits on me so i called cops
and filed assault charges on him finaly the court hears it i had to get a lawyer as right before court he filed on me bogus charges of harasment so the prosocuter cant get involded and we both get our own lawyers

then we go to court my lawyer gets his to have him agree to a no contact order finaly wich we both have to have on us so he cant bother us under penalty of jail but i have the same on me so if he lies and files on me i can get arrested but all the evidince an paper work is on my side and the same judge would see it for what it is but i could get screwed by a new judge who decided to blelieve him owell

come this month he moved to the 5th and top floor so hes got no one over him and hopefully he goes away or drops dead :worship:

good luck

Tricia819
09-15-2008, 07:14 PM
Wow......I'm never moving. And I live in the (supposidly) 3rd most violent city in the country, but I LOVE my neighbors. Across the street are 2 families that grew up on the same street as me, to the west is a great old couple that just ADORE my children (it's like having another set of grandparents living next door), and to the east is a single guy who is hardly ever home.

asoko
09-15-2008, 07:20 PM
I think you should document everything and use all the connections you have. You and your family could be in danger. As a teenager, my sister was stalked (I mean felony stalked.) My parents got caller ID to keep track of the phone calls (this was in the early 90's), there were a number of different numbers, tried to get the location of the phones from the phone companies, but they were payphones so you needed a warrant. One of my parents best friends knew a judge and explained the situation to him, they got the warrant. When the stalker called, my mom paged my dad with the phone booth number, he and my brother drove to the payphone and tried to catch the guy. Finally they saw someone at the payphone. As fate had it, there was a police officer right nearby, my dad approached the police officer and told him the situation. The police officer approached the guy, asked him what he was doing and got his name etc. This guy was a serial stalker. He was even featured on a nightime news program - Dateline or something. My sister was not the first girl he stalked, he was fired from coaching jobs after stalking the players, even made some of his phone calls when he was in jail. He was really sick. When they were charging him for my sister's case, my mom had to fight to get it to be a felony (she wanted him to get the mental help he needed, not be put back on the streets to hurt someone). The courts didn't know what his record was. He had been convicted before of misdemeanor. My sister did have to do certain things to have it seen as felony stalking, one of which was that see had to tell him to stop contacting her. I can't remember the others. By the way, my sister had never met him. He got her name and picture out of the local newspaper. I know how scared she was. I can't even imagine the fear if he were close.

livie1205
09-15-2008, 07:33 PM
Thanks everyone for your support!I will take your advice and start taking photos and see if my dh can do something at work...

Karlzmom
09-15-2008, 08:16 PM
:mad: wHAT DO YOU DO ABOUT BAD NEIGHBORS? There is this weird family that moved in across from us about a year ago...well the dad stays home and the mom works (not the weird part)but all he does all day is drink beer and drive back and forth to and from the store....he has been harassing us for a while tailgaiting me,putting poop in our mailbox (he did the same to our neighbor and they saw them do it) ect...he called my dh work to complain (dh is LEO) that our son goes to a good school out of our area (we applied for movement at school board and got approved) and his son was denied and has to go to a not so good school and that my husband did not help him dig a ditch yeh dig a ditch...lol after working all night...said he is the youngest man in neighborhood and didnt help! LIKE HE HAS TO HELP HIM lol they told him not a work issue...but he has been waiting till I leave the drivway and getting right on my butt and following! I think he is a little wacko! What would you do?I did make a report about the poop thing already...


We moved. Seriously! I know its not really an option for many people, but we bit the bullet and left. As a member of the law enforcement community [I'm a county prosecutor], I couldn't be calling the police everytime they threw stuff at the house, challlenged DH to fight, vanalized our property, did etc. Instead, we looked at each other and decided that the hassle and expense of moving was worth the peace on a daily basis. We have never regretted it. Of course, you could always move into another problem, or find that your neighborhood changes [which is what happened to us when the neighbor-from-h*ll moved in across the street & then his brother moved in next door] Good luck to you, its not an easy situation.....just remember to never argue with an idiot - a bystander won't be able to tell the difference :)