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View Full Version : Feeling terribly guilty . . . . .


chrisw127
04-14-2008, 09:45 AM
Okay, a few months ago I planned a girls' weekend in May that turned into a trip to Disney (my doing, of course). Since we were going to Disney, the girls with kids decided to take a kid or two. I'm thrilled, as I'll be seeing a dear friend of mind who I haven't seen since my oldest (now five) was born plus her beautiful 17 year old daughter who I nannied for one summer while I was in grad school.

Here's the thing: I have 13 month old twins and feel awful about leaving them. I've never been away from them for more than two or three hours. While I'm excited about giving the five-year old a trip alone with mom, I feel like I'm going to be spending the whole time missing the twins something awful.

On the one hand, I really need a bit of a break. Twins are a lot of work (and good things too) and my husband is excellent with them. Plus, I hired a sitter for two afternoons so my husband won't be too overwhelmed (which I might add, is a LOT more help than I get during the week). And it's only for three whole days!

Truthfully, I know this is going to be okay, but I can't stop feeling guilty. When we planned this, I was completely fine with it. Now, not so much.

Any thoughts on banishing maternal guilt?

rellabee
04-14-2008, 09:52 AM
Concentrate on how good it will be for your 5-year old to have special alone time with Mom....also remember that you are a better mom to your twins by being able to relax and take a break. If it helps your guilt, then use your guilt as an excuse to buy the twins some souvenirs!

Camno's Mama
04-14-2008, 10:16 AM
Tell yourself that a three day trip for two 13-month-olds would be stressful for everyone!

They will have more fun at home with Daddy! Seriously, you need more time than that for them to adjust to the new schedule and the travel, etc. Unfortunately, girls weekends only last for a few days! If you just had more time...;)

chrisw127
04-14-2008, 07:44 PM
Thank you both. I'm just going to keep repeating all of this to myself everytime I get the urge to just take the whole bunch.

disneymomto5
04-14-2008, 08:17 PM
Now granted my 5 children are very spread out in ages, and so it helps that they can help me out if they are so inclined, however, every few years I take a long weekend and go visit my sister in Tampa. Sometimes we jot to Disney for a day, sometimes not, but we always have fun. I do miss my kids, but that's ok too. I come home rested and relaxed and a happy mommy is a good thing for your children. You have to take care of yourself first. And another plus, maybe they'll appreciate you. I know whenever I come back everyone has missed me like crazy!!!!