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View Full Version : Disarming Rude People at WDW (aka, how not to let rudeness "Harsh Your Mellow")


minmate
02-22-2008, 05:21 PM
Have read a few posts lately discussing rudeness of others in WDW. Regardless of what reason they're being rude, if someone at the world personally confronts you or makes rude comments towards you - how do yo overcome it?

Do you ignore it, do you say something back? What?

I'd like to be armed with some ideas in case this happens to us... I'm not looking for ideas to escalate a confrontation -- but to DIFFUSE it!

So, let's hear it smart, kind, mellow DIS-folks!

praline3001
02-22-2008, 05:25 PM
popcorn::

this is going to be another GOOD thread this evening :rolleyes1 :lmao:


Actually to be honest... we just ignore rude people. It doesn't even faze us... really we just block it out!

Now rude princesses at dinner? welll..... a bit harder to ignore but I did :rolleyes: :laughing:

Lynne M
02-22-2008, 05:27 PM
The same thing I do when I encounter rudeness anywhere in the 'real' world. Ignore it. It's not worth responding to.

Please don't feel like you have to specially prepare to handle rudeness at WDW, like you'll be assaulted by rudeness every ten feet. :) Sure, you'll run into the occasional ill-mannered person there, just like you would anywhere else on the planet. But by and large, you'll find that your fellow guests are happy and polite, in a good mood because they're on vacation in a fun place.

And it's extraordinarily rare to come across a rude CM. The vast majority are good people, who work like dogs for very little money, to help you enjoy your vacation. Not quite sure how they maintain their good mood, but they do. :)

teachingmykids
02-22-2008, 05:36 PM
I tend to have a very smart mouth :cool2: and have to be very careful. Once a woman ran into my daughter with her stroller, cutting her ankle. The woman ran off before I could say anything (fortunately). On several occasions when someone is rude I pretend to throw dust on them and say, "oooo someone needs some pixie dust..." That usually just makes them mad. :laughing:
So, to answer your question..... well, I'm no help whatsoever!

jacksmomma
02-22-2008, 05:59 PM
Generally when I encounter rudeness in the parks I simply overlook it. I find it unfortunate that people have to be rude in such an awesome place, but it happens. Now, the one exception to that is when a CM as Alice was openly rude to me in front of children I still cannot believe that happened and it was 4 years ago! I was so shocked that I did not say anything. I wish I would have said something to other CMs, but I did not.

LegoMom3
02-22-2008, 06:20 PM
I tend to have a very smart mouth :cool2: and have to be very careful. Once a woman ran into my daughter with her stroller, cutting her ankle. The woman ran off before I could say anything (fortunately). On several occasions when someone is rude I pretend to throw dust on them and say, "oooo someone needs some pixie dust..." That usually just makes them mad. :laughing:
So, to answer your question..... well, I'm no help whatsoever!



:rotfl2: :rotfl2: OMG that is too funny!! I've gotta remember that one! :lmao:

valandemmy
02-22-2008, 06:36 PM
we haven't actually had anyone had anyone say anything to us,but when we were waiting for a parade sitting at the top of the steps, there was 2 families fighting about their spots. one lady kept looking at her daughter and saying "you can blame THOSE people for us not getting to see the parade very well" and "they are the ones that took our seats" and the other group was fighting back with them. DH and i just looked at each other cracking up. DH said really loud, "Wow, looks like someone needs some pixie dust" :rotfl:
i was in total disbelief that they would fight like that over something so silly in front of their children!

disgram
02-22-2008, 07:08 PM
Actually, I like that "looks like someone need some pixie dust"! Think I will use that if we ever run into those poor people who have lost theirs!

We have been fortunate in our trips to WDW. We did have an incident when we were waiting for Mickey's Philhemagic. Four young men(?) were being quite rude and swearing with my DGDs there to hear all they had to say. I finally asked them to go ahead of us and to please remember that there are alot of children here that don't really need to hear their foul langage. They looked at me as if I had two heads but they did go ahead of us and we never heard anymore!

PrincessTigerLily
02-22-2008, 07:11 PM
Good for you DisGram! That is always something that I would love to comment on (cursing at Disney World...shouldn't that be a given to not do???), and I like your answer! Good thread! I like the positive spin!

Disney Von Drake
02-22-2008, 07:19 PM
It's easy to ignore rude behavior from other guests.

It's very difficult to ignore the rude behavior exhibited by some CM's.

Rudeness is often born out of ignorance.

Therefore, ignore rude guests and report rude CM's.

I should have put numbers on these like the Rusty Scupper. :cool2:

disneyjunkie
02-22-2008, 07:33 PM
Do you ignore it, do you say something back? What?


I'm from Brooklyn so I HAVE to say something back.:lmao:

DISPrincessMom
02-22-2008, 07:33 PM
Oh, I wish I could take the high road like most of you but, when I feel someone is doing injustice to me or my family...well, it's not pretty :scared1:

I was waiting for Spectro one time (90 minutes! And both of my kids FIRST time seeing it), sitting on the wall in front of HOP with my stroller in front of me and saving the tiniest spot next to me for my husband and this woman just walks up about 10 minutes before the parade and takes his seat (he had taken DD4 to the bathroom). I told her very politely that I was saving the seat for my family and she said 'what family?' all snotty. OMG, I nearly lost it right there. The nice family next to me (that I had been chatting with for the past hour) were nice enough to squeeze down and make room for her on the OTHER side. And, she made some comment about how nice they were and gave me all kinds of dirty looks. I would have been happy to make room but she just waltzed in there and sat down like she owned the place. UGH!!

Hats off to all of you that keep your cool!:worship:

Cutting is the other thing that makes my blood boil and I will not hesitate to open my big mouth then either :goodvibes

GrowingUpDisney
02-22-2008, 08:12 PM
Good for you DisGram! That is always something that I would love to comment on (cursing at Disney World...shouldn't that be a given to not do???), and I like your answer! Good thread! I like the positive spin!

Actually, I am of the opinion that that should be a given ANYWHERE not just in WDW. Cursing is just a sign of ignorance...

EMom
02-22-2008, 09:34 PM
Last trip was 10 days long and all CMs were great. I was scared to death we'd get run over by an ECV, but no accidents happened. :cool1: The only time I came close to "danger"....meaning there was a potential for losing my temper was when a woman purposely rammed my foot with an EMPTY stroller to get me to move over so she could get by. :eek:

Without getting into specifics and logistics, YES, I am 100% certain she did it on purpose. The crowd had sort of jammed up a bit and there was not enough room for her to get by between me and the person on the other side. To get by, she needed me to move over or for the other person to move over, but in a crowd, it's just not that easy. Not to mention, she'd only gain a few feet, because the log jam was in front of us as well. :sad2:

Just before rammed my foot, I happened to turn my head and look backward and I saw her look directly down at my foot and AIM at it! She actually had to turn the stroller a bit and go out of her way to achieve this. With her eyes fixed on my foot, she turned that stroller and headed straight for my foot! :mad: This all happened within a few seconds, so I didn't have time to react. She hit my foot and luckily, I had sneakers on so it didn't hurt too much. But it did hack me off royally.

I moved over a bit and let her squeeze past. She slowly edged ahead and the devil on my shoulder was sooooo much louder than the angel on the other shoulder that as she passed, I gave her a little kick in the ankle bone. :rotfl2: Then I assumed the face of an angel and kept walking. :lmao: She never did anything, so I'm pretty sure she knew exactly what had happened. :rolleyes: It was all very low key. DH never even realized it happened either.

I don't know if that's in the intended spirit of the thread, but it IS how I kept the rudeness from getting to ME. :laughing: I'd have been chapped all day if I'd let someone get away with purposely aiming a stroller at me and hitting me with it. This way, within a few seconds I was all better. Some will say I should be ashamed.....But I'm not. :rotfl:

Rhonna
02-23-2008, 12:25 AM
Generally when I encounter rudeness in the parks I simply overlook it. I find it unfortunate that people have to be rude in such an awesome place, but it happens. Now, the one exception to that is when a CM as Alice was openly rude to me in front of children I still cannot believe that happened and it was 4 years ago! I was so shocked that I did not say anything. I wish I would have said something to other CMs, but I did not.

Alice was rude to me at Disneyland several years ago. I caught on - eventually - that it might be part of her characters "attitude" - there was a comment on this particular character on the boards a long time ago and some people mentioned the same thing about Alice's character. (Just like you expect the villains to behave a certain way.)

In the movie, Alice has a bit of an attitude also. Of course, I don't know exactly what she said to you. My "Alice" was walking around with the Mad Hatter and gave me a smart remark when I asked if I could have my picture taken with them. (Basically, the answer was no and then they kept on walking and talking with each other and ignored me.) I did see them stop for a child - so maybe she is supposed to be in character for adults but softer for little kids?

It was a bit of a shock since most characters are so accomodating.

tnmomof4
02-23-2008, 02:47 AM
I always try to overlook rudeness too. One way to diffuse rudeness is just to be really nice any way. The people that have been rude to me or my family, usually don't look like they are having a good time. They don't look happy. They don't look like they are at the best place in the world. I have said "Have a Magical Day"! a couple times when someone was being really rude. I have made myself and my kids laugh by saying that. I don't say it sarcastically, but just in a nice way. As soon as we laugh, it helps me get rid of that feeling of wanting to be defensive. But it is hard when the rudeness is directed at my kids.

I said something last year during the parade. We had been waiting for about 45 minutes. Two of my kids were sitting and two were standing behind them with me. Right when the parade was starting to pass us a lady and her two kids just pushed their way in front of us. I actually heard the lady tell her kids to just push their way through. They kicked my two kids that were sitting down. I tried politely to tell her that I didn't appreciate the way she just pushed her way in front of us and kicked my kids. One of my three year old's was actually crying because they had kicked/pushed him off the curb and into the street.

I was getting upset, but I still politely asked her to move back behind us or even beside us so my kids could see. I told her we had been waiting 45 minutes and that getting a spot early was a good idea for her to do next time. She said she never would be that stupid to wait for a parade. She said that if they had to push their way in to see the parade then that's what they were going to do. She said she paid to see the parade too. She told her kids that they were not going to move, and they didn't.

The family beside us that had been waiting the 45 minutes with us saw the whole thing. This mom also said something to this lady, but it didn't do any good. This family kindly moved over some so my kids could sit with their kids.

Usually we run into really nice and kind people at WDW.

chickenskin
02-23-2008, 04:55 AM
We always say "looks like someone needs a nap", and we're not refering to the kids.

SnwflkCts
02-23-2008, 06:14 AM
You know, sometimes I am so dense (pixiedust in my eyes?), that I don't even KNOW people are being rude and mean. :laughing: My DH just says I am trusting ... so I guess it could be said I ignore bad behavior.

But thank goodness ... I have yet to stumble on someone being cruel to a child or animal right in front of me - I think I would be a different person then!!!

PS: I NEVER stay for the parades - these seem like a very scary time!!!!!!!!!! :scared1: (not that others shouldn't but that is my aversion technique!)

soccerchick
02-23-2008, 06:21 AM
Yes, parades can be VERY scary. When we "do" a parade, a good offense is our best defense. It becomes camp out and eat and rest time. We find a spot, on a curb, EARLY. We send DH or I to Casey's for lunch/dinner or to get a snack and drinks. Being on the curb lets us hug our spots more securely.

joenan88
02-23-2008, 06:27 AM
I will admit I have a big NY mouth..BUT I can usually turn a bad situation around with humor..the only time my claws come out is when it involves my kiddies....hence my story..

We were in Disney a few years back my daughter was 3. She was sitting on a curb with my boys (4 and 7) and my hubby and I were right in back of them waiting for the parade to start at MGM. WELL all of a sudden a woman..about 50-60 flies through the crowd on her scooter and bumps my hubby and runs over my daughters finger...WELL I went crazy!!!!!!!!! The worst part was she didn't even apologize. A few CM's came over and took my daughter to first aid..she was fine..thank goodness..and gave us the use of fast passes for the rest of the day since we handled ourselves with class..

tonyolily
02-23-2008, 06:30 AM
[QUOTE=tnmomof4;23384530]

I said something last year during the parade. We had been waiting for about 45 minutes. Two of my kids were sitting and two were standing behind them with me. Right when the parade was starting to pass us a lady and her two kids just pushed their way in front of us. I actually heard the lady tell her kids to just push their way through. They kicked my two kids that were sitting down. I tried politely to tell her that I didn't appreciate the way she just pushed her way in front of us and kicked my kids. One of my three year old's was actually crying because they had kicked/pushed him off the curb and into the street.

I was getting upset, but I still politely asked her to move back behind us or even beside us so my kids could see. I told her we had been waiting 45 minutes and that getting a spot early was a good idea for her to do next time. She said she never would be that stupid to wait for a parade. She said that if they had to push their way in to see the parade then that's what they were going to do. She said she paid to see the parade too. She told her kids that they were not going to move, and they didn't. [QUOTE]


Wow. You have out of this world patience. I don't know how you handled that so calmly! For someone to dare mess with one of my kids...:headache:

Unfortunately, I have seen parents act like that during the fireworks too. What I tend to do if rude or mean people like that are standing near me is smile, try to move away from them & do the best I can to keep my kids close to me. It's really hard sometimes, but the thought that my kids are watching the way I react to those situations keeps me in check!

Unfortunately, that lady's kids are probably going to end up in prison.

RMulieri
02-23-2008, 08:33 AM
Now if someone is rude to me .....I smile and tell them to have a nice day.If someone pushed,stepped on on purpose,or otherwise bodily injured my kid...there will be confrontation( however accidents happen and apologies are always accepted):goodvibes

Carrickdisfan
02-23-2008, 08:36 AM
Hi

We are from the UK and have been going to Disney for many years and I must say I do find rudeness becoming more evident. I don't believe it is ignorance I just think it is bad manners. We are normally very reserved however I now would not let people off with being rude. I find that the cast members have very little authority therefore guests play on this. This happened a couple of years ago when I was watching the 3pm parade in MK just behind where the wheelchair users sit. A female (wouldn't call her a lady) blatantly stood in front of one lady in a wheelchair and when a cast member asked her to move she just stood her ground and nothing was done. Can the cast members not request that security escort these people out? I also find many people speak loudly and everyone hears their thoughts. We don't need to hear other people's thoughts - they should speak normally to their families. Some people cannot also accept that they are in the wrong. Of course we all know of the people who do not speak in English and pretend they do not know that they are being requested to move - classic case of someone standing beside these people who understood them saying 'if we let on we do not understand English they will leave us alone'. There is no excuse for rudeness anywhere and when we first started going to Orlando I was very impressed by the good manners of the everyone especially the children however unfortunately this seems to have declined a little. To give people the benefit of the doubt we all get excited and perhaps do not behave as we normally should.

MontanaZoo
02-23-2008, 08:37 AM
I usually makes these faces in sequence :mad: :rolleyes2 :sad2: and act like I can't believe people are so incredibly dense.

My problem is that I do roving at the local zoo as a volunteer and part of my job is to politely make sure that people follow the rules. Instead of "OMG don't let your child stand on top of the railing at the edge of the tiger exhibit!" I say politely "hi, is your child having trouble seeing the tiger, this viewing spot will work a lot better, could you move him there? Thanks." I automatically find myself slipping into this role at WDW too.

We also have strollers made by the same company as the WDW strollers....I think I should train my DNiece 11 that's going with me in March how to avoid stroller bashing (if that's at all possible). We should practice. :) She was horrified to hear that I've been hit by strollers at Disney World.

savannahjean85
02-23-2008, 10:26 AM
I ignore it if the rudeness is towards me, but if it is towards a CM I always make a point of telling them, "You are are doing a good job and that sometimes people are just rude; but thank you for making my trip magical!"

funkbucket007
02-23-2008, 10:37 AM
I don't typically get people being very rude to me (I'm 6' 4" & 250 lbs.) but instead of saying anything back to someone who is rude towards me or my family, I'll usually laugh in their face & they get so infuriated that they walk off.

Thats_for_Shore
02-23-2008, 10:49 AM
Cutting is the other thing that makes my blood boil and I will not hesitate to open my big mouth then either :goodvibes

Line cutters......aaaargh!!

I was waiting in line for Soarin with my DS8. Well, you know they have those interactive screens where you fly like a bird or pop balloons or whatever.

Anyhow, the family behind me was between screens, so their kids weren't getting into the action. I very nicely let the kids get in front of me so they could play with the screen. Well, when the line started moving, the parents joined the kids and got IN FRONT OF ME!

I was amazed, but didn't say anything, because I figured, it's not like there's one ride cart and they're taking my spot -- we'll probably be on the same ride.

And then, somehow, they got in front of another couple. They were inching their way to the front of the line!!

As we got to the front of the line, the CM actually had to tell the kids not to hang off of their little podium thing. They were literally climbing up the CM's podium, and the parents were doing nothing about it!

Well, of course, they got on the ride sooner than I did, because the CM let them through, and then filled the rest of the ride with fast passers. I guess the CM didn't want to have to deal with those kids anymore and was trying to get rid of them.

But it made me angry that these people were butting in line. My blood was boiling, but I decided not to make an issue out of it, because I didn't want to set a bad example for my DS.

te2077
02-23-2008, 11:16 AM
we just let rudeness go. We figure if they want to have a miserable trip fine, but they wont ruin ours.

This time is my first time at disney I witnessed an almost fight. We were sitting in the front seat, behind the driver on the Magical Express bus back to the airport. There was someone's little kid (maybe 2-3yrs) crying in the back of the bus. It wasnt a big deal but, the woman across from us yelled at the woman in the back to put her kid on her lap so that they didnt have to hear her kid yell all the way back to the airport. Then the husband of the woman across from us continues to yell back to them to take care of their kid etc etc. Well the husband from the back of the bus came up and sat right behind us. They were yelling at each other. All I thaught was OMG there's going to be a fight and we have nowhere to move. I was really afraid as my brother that is 15 is very fragile from being sick. Thank God that the bus driver stepped in and told them to calm down.

The funny thing was those nasty people who yelled back at the mother ended up being on our plane as well. :scared1:

We figure if you go to disney, you're going to hear crying kids. Its just a part of it. I cant imagine why a grown man and woman (who have thier own kid) would hollar about a little little kid. You would think that they would have run into this situation when their child was that little. It was really too sad and I could tell the mother in the back felt awful. We just gave her a nice smile as she left the bus. I didnt say anything to the woman across from us as I didnt really want to hear her complain all the way back to the airport.:headache:

jenn-n-okla
02-23-2008, 11:30 AM
Alice was rude to me at Disneyland several years ago. I caught on - eventually - that it might be part of her characters "attitude" - there was a comment on this particular character on the boards a long time ago and some people mentioned the same thing about Alice's character. (Just like you expect the villains to behave a certain way.)

In the movie, Alice has a bit of an attitude also. Of course, I don't know exactly what she said to you. My "Alice" was walking around with the Mad Hatter and gave me a smart remark when I asked if I could have my picture taken with them. (Basically, the answer was no and then they kept on walking and talking with each other and ignored me.) I did see them stop for a child - so maybe she is supposed to be in character for adults but softer for little kids?

It was a bit of a shock since most characters are so accomodating.

I visited last year (2007). Alice was rude to my 5yr old special needs daughter who had pushed her own Oxygen and carried her autograph book to the line herself. Alice told the group she was leaving for her break at the exact moment my daughter got to the front. I completely understand needing breaks and the attitude with adults, but with a child and a special needs child at that, well that was just rude. My daughter remembers it and has said she doesn't want to see Alice this year when we go.:headache:

MassJester
02-23-2008, 11:32 AM
I had an evening flight brooked from Orlando to Boston. It was scheduled to get me in late, but allowed me to make the most of my day at WDW. When I got onto the flight, there was a parent with 2 young children behind me with the other parent in the seat across the aisle.

The kids were over tired, and there were a few melt downs on the flight home. No one said anything, but the antics were long and loud.

When we arrived in Boston, their mother said to me, "I hope the kids weren't to bothersome, we had them up at the crack of dawn and kept going all day long."

I assured her that I wasn't annoyed at the children, after a day like that their disposition was entirely understandable. I did add that I was, however, disturbed by the obvious bad parenting that set the children up for failure.

jenn-n-okla
02-23-2008, 11:41 AM
We had an incident with a smoker. We were waiting in line for the bus to take us from MK to our hotel when a man lights up right in front of my daughter who was using Oxygen. It was late evening and as you know it can take up to 30mins to wait for the bus, so everyone was tired and cranky. I kindly but loudly said " Sir I would appreciate you not smoking near my daughter as we do not care to be blown up. Oxygen is flamable". He quickly said sorry and put it out, but did get out of line and light up in the back area. The look on his face was priceless. My mother was in shock as were several other guests waiting near us.

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 12:07 PM
I had an evening flight brooked from Orlando to Boston. It was scheduled to get me in late, but allowed me to make the most of my day at WDW. When I got onto the flight, there was a parent with 2 young children behind me with the other parent in the seat across the aisle.

The kids were over tired, and there were a few melt downs on the flight home. No one said anything, but the antics were long and loud.

When we arrived in Boston, their mother said to me, "I hope the kids weren't to bothersome, we had them up at the crack of dawn and kept going all day long."

I assured her that I wasn't annoyed at the children, after a day like that their disposition was entirely understandable. I did add that I was, however, disturbed by the obvious bad parenting that set the children up for failure.


You say you wanted to make the most of your last day at WDW, well, so did they!! It's not bad parenting, it's making the most of having to check out of your hotel at 11am, plane doesn't leave until late, no place for "down time," etc. From your post, I assume you don't have children and have never been in such a situation...until you have kids, you have no right to judge ANYONE'S parenting skills!

MassJester
02-23-2008, 12:14 PM
You say you wanted to make the most of your last day at WDW, well, so did they!! It's not bad parenting, it's making the most of having to check out of your hotel at 11am, plane doesn't leave until late, no place for "down time," etc. From your post, I assume you don't have children and have never been in such a situation...until you have kids, you have no right to judge ANYONE'S parenting skills!

I have no objection to their making the most of their last day--it's just doing at other people's expense that bothers me. The result of their decisions was entirely predictable, and therefore flawed.

a Really Bad Egg
02-23-2008, 12:16 PM
...I pretend to throw dust on them and say, "oooo someone needs some pixie dust..." That usually just makes them mad.

:lmao:

bosstoboss
02-23-2008, 12:16 PM
You say you wanted to make the most of your last day at WDW, well, so did they!! It's not bad parenting, it's making the most of having to check out of your hotel at 11am, plane doesn't leave until late, no place for "down time," etc. From your post, I assume you don't have children and have never been in such a situation...until you have kids, you have no right to judge ANYONE'S parenting skills!

Bravo!! Well said!!!

BabyPiglet
02-23-2008, 12:17 PM
We've never experienced any kind of rude guests at WDW. Ever.

I say, if you aren't looking for rude people then you won't find any rude people.

After reading these boards, people go to Disney with the thought that there will be all kinds of menacing, abusive people everywhere. It's simply not true.

CoachBagFanatic
02-23-2008, 12:21 PM
Rude and ignorant people do not set right with me. I truly try to hold my tongue but it doesn't last for long especially when my DS is involved. You would think in my 40 some odd years of living on this planet that I would finally learn not to get into confrontations. Nope not me. I was raised by a Marine and was taught to take nothing from no one. I have learned though to say thinks like "have a nice day in spite of yourself" when I run into rude people.

Now, have bodily harm or injury come to my DS like it did in June 2007 when he was purposely struck by this woman's empty stroller. The gloves were off at that point. We were leaving MK and DH and DS were walking slightly ahead of me so I was watching them. Sure enough this woman rammed my DS in the leg. Now mind you she could have gone around him as there was plenty of room. I guess he was not walking fast enough for her and she did not want to move. I stopped her as he almost fell because she caught him off guard and we had some words (no cursing). She was very nasty in the beginning of our conversation and needless to say her attitude changed toward the end of our conversation. A CM even saw her do this as he came up to us and asked if we wanted to have someone look at his leg. Told him it wasn't necessary as she did not break any skin but I thanked him very much. DS did bruise but not too bad.

I know sometimes I feel like I am lowering myself but I can't help it when my DS is involved. I don't curse but I do get loud. I can thank my father for that one.

I so like the Pixie Dust comment. That's great.:thumbsup2

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 12:22 PM
The result of their decisions was entirely predictable, and therefore flawed.

huh?

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 12:23 PM
Bravo!! Well said!!!

Thank you!!

MassJester
02-23-2008, 12:25 PM
huh?

The parents may have had the stamina for a long day at the parks followed by the airport experience, but that was clearly beyond their toddlers ability.

To spend the extra hours in park at the expense of their ability to enjoy the day seems selfish to me.

taitai
02-23-2008, 12:25 PM
You say you wanted to make the most of your last day at WDW, well, so did they!! It's not bad parenting, it's making the most of having to check out of your hotel at 11am, plane doesn't leave until late, no place for "down time," etc. From your post, I assume you don't have children and have never been in such a situation...until you have kids, you have no right to judge ANYONE'S parenting skills!


Actually, I disagree. If you know you are going to have an evening flight and you have little kids, then don't "get up at the crack of dawn" and keep your kids "going all day". The results are entirely predictable and you really do NOT have to be a parent to know that it is going to result in tired, cranky kids. Also, any parent knows that there are ways to make downtime when downtime is needed even at Disney or in an airport. I do have kids, I have been in that situation and I agree that the parents could have made better choices. However, in deference to the parents in this situation, perhaps they didn't choose that flight and their original, more appropriately scheduled one was cancelled.

taitai

schoen
02-23-2008, 12:35 PM
I have only encountered rudeness by another guest once. We were making our way to our seats to see Fantasmic! Just as I was sitting down I noticed a woman trying to get my attention. When I acknowledged her I was expecting her to tell me that I had dropped something or something of that nature. Nope. She said in a very sarcastic voice "I just wanted to thank you for bumping me with your elbow".

Now, I am good person, and had I realized that I bumped her I certainly would have apologized immediately. I am the sort of person who apologizes to people who egregiously bump into me!

I had no interest in starting a scene in the middle of the theater, so I just said (I am ashamed to say it was in a cold voice) "I'm sorry, I didn't realize I hit you".

I felt like I was in the twilight zone, I couldn't believe it was happening! Oh well. It just ruined our moment, not our day!

labattblue
02-23-2008, 12:40 PM
The parents may have had the stamina for a long day at the parks followed by the airport experience, but that was clearly beyond their toddlers ability.

To spend the extra hours in park at the expense of their ability to enjoy the day seems selfish to me.
How do you know that they didn't have an enjoyable day at the parks when you only encountered them on the airplane? For all you know it could have been the best day of their vacation!:confused3

MassJester
02-23-2008, 12:41 PM
How do you know that they didn't have an enjoyable day at the parks when you only encountered them on the airplane? For all you know it could have been the best day of their vacation!:confused3

Which ended very badly for them.

minmate
02-23-2008, 12:47 PM
I like the pixie dust comment and the idea of ignoring rude behavior when you can. However, I am not sure I want to set the example to my children to "roll over and let people talk to them rudely."

I don't want to be rude back to people but I'd like to know more about things to say to diffuse that feeling you get -- you know the little black rain cloud that can hang over you after experiencing something less than pleasant....

I also don't agree w/the comment that if you're not looking for rude people, they wont' find you. Usually, that's why they take me so off guard - because I wasn't expecting it at all. This goes for time in and out of Disney.


Now, the person on here who made the passive-aggressive remark to the parent with crying kids on the plane, I view your remark as just as rude as the choice of the parents to keep their kids running all day. You had the choice to hold your tongue but chose to say something hurtful. Of course it was your choice to express your opinion - just as it was their choice deciding what to do with their day. However, I have to wonder that if you ruined her day just as much - or more - than she (or her kids) ruined yours. :confused: If that was your intent, then I guess you are at peace with that thought.

As far as claiming kids' behavior is predictable - I will say I wholeheartedly disagree. Of course you can anticipate, but this is a debate for another thread. I don't really want to go there with this - the thread is meant to discuss ways to get on with your day in spite of less than magical moments trying to nudge their way in. I know they don't happen every ten minutes -- but I'm looking for other people's stretegies in getting past the bad taste in their mouth left by these encounters....:hippie:

MassJester
02-23-2008, 12:54 PM
Now, the person on here who made the passive-aggressive remark to the parent with crying kids on the plane, I view your remark as just as rude as the choice of the parents to keep their kids running all day. You had the choice to hold your tongue but chose to say something hurtful. Of course it was your choice to express your opinion - just as it was their choice deciding what to do with their day. However, I have to wonder that if you ruined her day just as much - or more - than she (or her kids) ruined yours. :confused: If that was your intent, then I guess you are at peace with that thought.



There is some irony to the fact that my expressing an opinion as to their conduct is considered rude by people who have felt it fine to express an opinion as to mine.

CoachBagFanatic
02-23-2008, 01:00 PM
We don't let anyone or anything ruin our vacation. It might take some of our time but that would be all. Engaging in confrontation is not a good thing especially in front of children unless the situation is warranted such as in my previous post. Like I said, it was more of a conversation (with me being the louder of the two):lmao: but it wasn't an in your face thing. I would not do that in front of my DS. I am sure there will be more responses on this thread that will give you and others such as myself great ideas when situations arise. Good thread.:thumbsup2

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 01:07 PM
You could have gritted your teeth and moved on, or given the wornout, probably already embarrassed enough, mom a little pixie dust. Your words, however, I'm sure hit her hard after a long day with UNPREDICTABLE toddlers. You walked off feeling a bit smug that you know more than she does about how to parent her children and that you put her in her place. She, on the other hand, was probably hurt by your comments, and ended her vacation questioning her parenting skills in the midst of circumstances that for all you know couldn't be helped, and aside from that 2 hour plane ride you know nothing about. THAT is the difference. You could have kept your mouth shut, but chose to be rude in the midst of someone else's already difficult situation. We're just calling you on that.

ang
02-23-2008, 01:08 PM
I think you have to remember, You will meet a lot more nice people in disney than bad."

On last trip, several times I end up talking to couple of women about DH"s:lmao: , leave thing to us women. WOW! I talk out aloud what I was thinking, Like, ok, as always I will take care it. We were staying line to Liberty Tavern for dinner, will He wanted to get out of the heat and went inside. So, I stood there waiting..and this lady said, why isn't men can get away with that. Then we started to laugh.

I met a lot more really nice people then rude.

One year we met a rude person, I had my say, then thats it.

I think some People forget that everyone at WDW is on vacation. We all point money into it and want to see everything.

I learn, just smile and we pretty much aginore them. It's not worth wasting your time.

I think, parades are the worst...we avoid them now.

MassJester
02-23-2008, 01:10 PM
We're just calling you on that.

I actually recognized what you were doing the first time you posted, but thanks.

I don't agree with your assesment, made from the comfort of your desk chair, but I appreciate your right to express your opinion.

labattblue
02-23-2008, 01:19 PM
I actually recognized what you were doing the first time you posted, but thanks.

I don't agree with your assesment, made from the comfort of your desk chair, but I appreciate your right to express your opinion.
WOW! You are really a piece of work. You have reached a level in life that the rest of us can only dream about. I'm surprised you have come down from your throne to converse with the rest of us.

:worship: :worship: :worship: :worship:

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 01:19 PM
And I don't agree with yours, from your ability to travel alone without diaper bags, strollers, extra luggage, sippy cups, baby wipes, cheerios, oh yeah, and two, three, or four (yes, overtired and overstimulated) children. Until you've done so, you have a right to your own ignorance, I suppose, and so I forgive you for that. Here's some pixie dust, and have a magical day!!

CoachBagFanatic
02-23-2008, 01:22 PM
popcorn::

ang
02-23-2008, 01:39 PM
popcorn::
popcorn:: popcorn:: I with you...

MassJester
02-23-2008, 01:42 PM
popcorn:: popcorn:: I with you...

Don't forget a beverage, the popcorn gets salty :drinking1

;)

luvthemouse71
02-23-2008, 01:47 PM
Last trip was 10 days long and all CMs were great. I was scared to death we'd get run over by an ECV, but no accidents happened. :cool1: The only time I came close to "danger"....meaning there was a potential for losing my temper was when a woman purposely rammed my foot with an EMPTY stroller to get me to move over so she could get by. :eek:

Without getting into specifics and logistics, YES, I am 100% certain she did it on purpose. The crowd had sort of jammed up a bit and there was not enough room for her to get by between me and the person on the other side. To get by, she needed me to move over or for the other person to move over, but in a crowd, it's just not that easy. Not to mention, she'd only gain a few feet, because the log jam was in front of us as well. :sad2:

Just before rammed my foot, I happened to turn my head and look backward and I saw her look directly down at my foot and AIM at it! She actually had to turn the stroller a bit and go out of her way to achieve this. With her eyes fixed on my foot, she turned that stroller and headed straight for my foot! :mad: This all happened within a few seconds, so I didn't have time to react. She hit my foot and luckily, I had sneakers on so it didn't hurt too much. But it did hack me off royally.

I moved over a bit and let her squeeze past. She slowly edged ahead and the devil on my shoulder was sooooo much louder than the angel on the other shoulder that as she passed, I gave her a little kick in the ankle bone. :rotfl2: Then I assumed the face of an angel and kept walking. :lmao: She never did anything, so I'm pretty sure she knew exactly what had happened. :rolleyes: It was all very low key. DH never even realized it happened either.

I don't know if that's in the intended spirit of the thread, but it IS how I kept the rudeness from getting to ME. :laughing: I'd have been chapped all day if I'd let someone get away with purposely aiming a stroller at me and hitting me with it. This way, within a few seconds I was all better. Some will say I should be ashamed.....But I'm not. :rotfl:
LOL, good for you. Had she done that to me, she may have gotten worse than a little kick in the ankle. I can let a lot of stuff go but I'm one of these people that tolerates a lot until you do something heinous, then I lose it. You did well, you don't want to be too obvious in taking revenge like the Tea Cup lady a few months back! I believe she beat the snot out of some woman who cut in front of her at the Tea Cups and she got arrested.:sad2:

soccerchick
02-23-2008, 01:58 PM
This thread has diverged into two distinct discusson topic paths, I think. The original about dealing with deliberately rude and inconsiderate vacationers and the second about dealing with cranky, tired kids (and our ability to deal, or not, with them). This second topic makes me want to do a little PSA.

As I've learned from these boards, there are LOTS of reasons kids seem to have meltdowns. There are so many kids with special needs, I try to remind myself when I see a difficut parent/child situtation that things don't always appear to be what they really are. Your assumptions of bad parenting choices could be the very last reason on the list.

luvthemouse71
02-23-2008, 02:01 PM
I have no objection to their making the most of their last day--it's just doing at other people's expense that bothers me. The result of their decisions was entirely predictable, and therefore flawed.
I never blame children when it's obvious they are overtired and cranky. I do however, agree with you that some parents don't seem to realize that these little ones just reach a point where they've had it, they need a nap. Even at home you can see it, toddlers out at the mall at 10:30 pm, being dragged along by the hand, and they're so tired that their eyes are red and they can't walk without stumbling.

I also agree that you can kind of figure if you've had your little one up all day, they are going to fuss. At this point, the vacation is not fun for anyone, especially the kid, who is being dragged around, because the parents spent thousands to take their kids there, and dang it, they're getting their money's worth.I also sympathized, because I always end up sitting next to the crying baby on the plane! Can't be helped, not the baby or parents fault,but annoying none the less. I personally believe that it's kind of silly to take really small kids to WDW and therefore have to drag around the child, the sippy cups, the cheerios and the stroller that doubles as a small hotel room, but that's my opinion and a whole other flame filled thread, LOL. You did the DIS equivalent of poking a large bear with a stick, Dude, (the "Mommy brigade" can be particularly vicious)but good for you for standing your ground.

PS.. Your siggie is too funny:lmao:

MassJester
02-23-2008, 02:04 PM
PS.. Your siggie is too funny:lmao:

Thanks for the kind remarks.

And have fun at the Poly! It's on my list of places to experience.

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 02:10 PM
This thread has diverged into two distinct discusson topic paths, I think. The original about dealing with deliberately rude and inconsiderate vacationers and the second about dealing with cranky, tired kids (and our ability to deal, or not, with them). This second topic makes me want to do a little PSA.

As I've learned from these boards, there are LOTS of reasons kids seem to have meltdowns. There are so many kids with special needs, I try to remind myself when I see a difficut parent/child situtation that things don't always appear to be what they really are. Your assumptions of bad parenting choices could be the very last reason on the list.


What if someone is deliberately rude to a parent with a tired, cranky kid? :confused3 :)
Do we need another thread for that?? just kidding.

I agree...I've been in so many situations with my kids during which their behavior and/or my reaction could be confusing for curious on-lookers. But at the end of the day, I am the best judge as to how to handle my own children, and other parents are usually the same for theirs. It's extremely rude for strangers to comment on others' ability to parent, and that's why the above conversation took place.

disneyjunkie
02-23-2008, 02:15 PM
I had an evening flight brooked from Orlando to Boston. It was scheduled to get me in late, but allowed me to make the most of my day at WDW. When I got onto the flight, there was a parent with 2 young children behind me with the other parent in the seat across the aisle.

The kids were over tired, and there were a few melt downs on the flight home. No one said anything, but the antics were long and loud.

When we arrived in Boston, their mother said to me, "I hope the kids weren't to bothersome, we had them up at the crack of dawn and kept going all day long."

I assured her that I wasn't annoyed at the children, after a day like that their disposition was entirely understandable. I did add that I was, however, disturbed by the obvious bad parenting that set the children up for failure.

I'm a parent and I agree with you.:thumbsup2

DisneyTigers
02-23-2008, 02:17 PM
I personally believe that it's kind of silly to take really small kids to WDW and therefore have to drag around the child, the sippy cups, the cheerios and the stroller that doubles as a small hotel room, but that's my opinion and a whole other flame filled thread, LOL.

:


So, I take my 9 year old and my 5 year old, and leave my 2 and 3 year olds at home? It's a family vacation destination...if you kids bother you that much, find another place to go.

I never drag my children anywhere; they LOVE to travel, but, that does require extra-ness that I'm willing to deal with... I wasn't complaining about it at all, just making a point.

Brenle
02-23-2008, 02:27 PM
I don't typically get people being very rude to me (I'm 6' 4" & 250 lbs.) but instead of saying anything back to someone who is rude towards me or my family, I'll usually laugh in their face & they get so infuriated that they walk off.

You sound like my DH. Most people don't try to cut us in line or at a parade. And if they do, he speaks up and they leave. It does help to be big.

And I think the PPers have zeroed in on two key scenarios where you encounter the most rude people.

1, any parade and 2, getting bumped from behind with a stroller.

Everyone wants a good spot at a parade, no matter when they arrive, and everyone is in a hurry to get from point A to point B.

And I agree with a PP. I don't want to teach my children to be passive in situations where someone intentionally hits you, so I stop right there, turn around. Then I'll hear "sorry." :wizard:

luvthemouse71
02-23-2008, 02:44 PM
So, I take my 9 year old and my 5 year old, and leave my 2 and 3 year olds at home? It's a family vacation destination...if you kids bother you that much, find another place to go.

I never drag my children anywhere; they LOVE to travel, but, that does require extra-ness that I'm willing to deal with... I wasn't complaining about it at all, just making a point.As was I..I believe I stated that my statement was my opinion. And no, small kids don't bother me, parents that are in over their heads and expect everyone else to deal with their poor parenting, (including their own kids) do. I would never take small kids to WDW, but then again, I'd never have 4 kids. Doesn't mean that having a large family is bad, or that taking babies to WDW is bad either, just not my choice. that's all I was saying.

And some parents do drag their kids around and then get upset with them that they are "ruining" the vacation. I saw a woman hollering this to her small child last trip. Not saying that you do this, just stating what I saw. Hey, if you do well at handling your kids then more power to you.:upsidedow

disneyjunkie
02-23-2008, 02:55 PM
It's a family vacation destination...if you kids bother you that much, find another place to go.

Oh please,

Most people aren't bothered by kids. However, they are bothered by clueless parents.

As parents we have to be mindful of how our child's behavior effects those around us.

We might think it's cute to watch our kids laugh with glee while playing with the ropes in a line. The person that's getting hit by rope may not agree.

We might think it's cute to hear our child sing the ABC song while waiting for lunch. The other Diners may not agree.

We might think it's cute to let our child play with a spray bottle in a crowded area. The people getting sprayed may not agree.

Most people will bite their tongue and let it go. Others will comment on it.

I love kids. I'm trapped in a room with 21 five-year-old each day. :teacher:

I expect kids to behave like kids (not mini-adults). I also expect parents to parent.

RMulieri
02-23-2008, 02:55 PM
Why oh Why do these threads always become so negative? I think the thread was how to disarm rudeness at DW , not lets hit on every flame worthy topic we can.

a Really Bad Egg
02-23-2008, 02:57 PM
Why oh Why do these threads always become so negative?

I'm starting to miss that thread about the skywriter.

:lmao:

tnmomof4
02-23-2008, 03:04 PM
I like the pixie dust comment and the idea of ignoring rude behavior when you can. However, I am not sure I want to set the example to my children to "roll over and let people talk to them rudely."

I don't want to be rude back to people but I'd like to know more about things to say to diffuse that feeling you get -- you know the little black rain cloud that can hang over you after experiencing something less than pleasant....



For the most part the people you meet at WDW are very nice and friendly.
I have gotten to talk with lots of other moms while waiting in lines or waiting for parades. There are far more nice people at Disney than rude.

I can understand you wanting to set an example to your children. That's why I said that if someone is ourtright rude, I don't get into a big confrontation with them. I just say to them "You have a good day" or "Have a Magical day". There really is no need to be rude back because that doesn't help diffuse that little black rain cloud.

When that lady and her kids were rude to my kids, it was hard to not say what I really wanted to say. I made sure that my kids heard me say "excuse me". I was as polite back as could be, but still said something to her. I tried to set an example to my kids that when others are rude, you can say something to them it is just how you say it and what you say. I did say to my kids that those people didn't look happpy, and maybe they were having a bad day. I told my kids that we were not going to let a few rude people ruin our day. And it didn't ruin our day.

If someone just bumps me with an elbow, I wouldn't say anything because chances are they didn't even know it. I have been bumped by strollers many times because I think lots of people are just in a hurry and don't pay attention to others. Although, like others have said some do it on purpose, and I have had someone do it too me on purpose because they just don't care.

Just remember that you will meet lots and lots of nice, kind people at WDW. I always will remember the family that let my kids sit with their kids when someone was rude to us. I will always remember another family that let my kids use their dry rain poncho to sit on the ground when it was wet from rain. I will remember the family that gave my DS two FP for EE when we were getting into the standby line because they had to go and couldn't use them. I remember the family that let my kids keep a floating at the pool because they were leaving and couldn't take it on the plane.

My DS was picked to be in the Jedi Training at DHS. There were also twin boys picked that were about 4. Neither one of them could get their little brown cape on. I was so proud of my DS. Up there on the stage in front of 100's of people, he helped each one of them put their cape on. Some people clapped for my DS when he did that. Afterwords, the Jedi Master said that he wanted to know if my DS would take a picture with him because he was so kind. The parents of the boys were so thankful too.

I have lots and lots more good things to remember about people I have encountered at Disney, than I do about rude people.

CoachBagFanatic
02-23-2008, 03:13 PM
I totally agree. We also have a lot of good memories about the great people that we have met while at the world. I only really remember that one incident as posted as it involved my DS getting hurt. But like you said, we did not let it ruin our day. Rude and ignorant people are everywhere. We just have to pick and choose our battles.

BabyPiglet
02-23-2008, 04:10 PM
Why do you people judge so easily? Because they had tired kids on an airplane, obviously they're horrid parents. :sad2:

maxiesmom
02-23-2008, 04:22 PM
You could have gritted your teeth and moved on, or given the wornout, probably already embarrassed enough, mom a little pixie dust. Your words, however, I'm sure hit her hard after a long day with UNPREDICTABLE toddlers. You walked off feeling a bit smug that you know more than she does about how to parent her children and that you put her in her place. She, on the other hand, was probably hurt by your comments, and ended her vacation questioning her parenting skills in the midst of circumstances that for all you know couldn't be helped, and aside from that 2 hour plane ride you know nothing about. THAT is the difference. You could have kept your mouth shut, but chose to be rude in the midst of someone else's already difficult situation. We're just calling you on that.

By the comment the parent made, she knew her kids were acting up because they were over-tired. And 99 out of 100 times if you run your kids to the point of exhaustion, they will act up. The parent should have known better, or more than likely knew better and didn't think about the consequences. The children's bad behavior was totally predictable! It is not rocket science.

That lady is lucky all she got was a small comment. Seems like she needed it as a reminder that the world does not revolve around her and her children.

GatorLady
02-23-2008, 04:54 PM
I'm starting to miss that thread about the skywriter.

:lmao:

:rotfl: You're TOO funny!!! I just read that thread last night, and now this....

TotalSnowWhite
02-23-2008, 05:02 PM
Oh please,

Most people aren't bothered by kids. However, they are bothered by clueless parents.

As parents we have to be mindful of how our child's behavior effects those around us.

We might think it's cute to watch our kids laugh with glee while playing with the ropes in a line. The person that's getting hit by rope may not agree.

We might think it's cute to hear our child sing the ABC song while waiting for lunch. The other Diners may not agree.

We might think it's cute to let our child play with a spray bottle in a crowded area. The people getting sprayed may not agree.

Most people will bite their tongue and let it go. Others will comment on it.

I love kids. I'm trapped in a room with 21 five-year-old each day. :teacher:

I expect kids to behave like kids (not mini-adults). I also expect parents to parent.


I agree with you to a point...

Parents definitely need to keep in mind how their child(ren)'s behavior affects others, but I won't stop my DS from singing his little heart out while we're waiting in line at Disney. If I have to choose between irritating a few bystanders or telling my little guy he can't sing in the Happiest Place on Earth, I'm probably going to let him belt it!! I will keep in mind others' vacation experience, but this is our vacation, too. You can't always defer to other people.

Dale-Not-Chip
02-23-2008, 05:11 PM
I ignore it if the rudeness is towards me, but if it is towards a CM I always make a point of telling them, "You are are doing a good job and that sometimes people are just rude; but thank you for making my trip magical!"

I go up the CM and say the very mean yet funny thing about the rude person that the Cast Member is not allowed to say.

Mo-Yo
02-23-2008, 05:39 PM
By the comment the parent made, she knew her kids were acting up because they were over-tired. And 99 out of 100 times if you run your kids to the point of exhaustion, they will act up. The parent should have known better, or more than likely knew better and didn't think about the consequences. The children's bad behavior was totally predictable! It is not rocket science.

I believe that the mom's comments show that she is very sensitive to the way her children's behavior affects others. It was an apology for pete's sake, and children's behavior IMHO is more complicated than rocket science sometimes. I think that the criticism was unwarranted and rude.

Are there really parents of children out there who have never stretched their kids and their own limits...especially on vacation???? Heck , vacation can be taxing for adults. Should kids have to stay home until they adults?

I always get compliments on my kids in public and at their school - how nice they are, well-behaved, mannerly, kind, etc., but no one is perfect, and there is A LOT of pressure on parents to be so.

Unless, the mother (or her children) were directly rude to you, your comments were extremely unkind. Perhaps you would do better to visit a less child-oriented type of vacation spot. You'd be less likely to encounter children on planes.

maxiesmom
02-23-2008, 06:55 PM
I believe that the mom's comments show that she is very sensitive to the way her children's behavior affects others. It was an apology for pete's sake, and children's behavior IMHO is more complicated than rocket science sometimes. I think that the criticism was unwarranted and rude.

Are there really parents of children out there who have never stretched their kids and their own limits...especially on vacation???? Heck , vacation can be taxing for adults. Should kids have to stay home until they adults?

I always get compliments on my kids in public and at their school - how nice they are, well-behaved, mannerly, kind, etc., but no one is perfect, and there is A LOT of pressure on parents to be so.

Unless, the mother (or her children) were directly rude to you, your comments were extremely unkind. Perhaps you would do better to visit a less child-oriented type of vacation spot. You'd be less likely to encounter children on planes.

Umm, I was NOT the poster who experienced this. And I don't think that kids should stay home, and I know that kids sometimes act up. The difference being that this parent did something that they HAD to know would not end with their kids being well behaved. The parents basically set their kids up to be cranky and unruley, and then were like oh well, what can you do. What you can do is NOT run your child until they are exhausted. There is no excuse to do so, and then to throw said child on a plane and think that they will somehow be little angels is just stupid, no other word.

And I don't take that mom's comments as an apology. To me it sounded like she was making an excuse for their bad behavior, and all the person who posted that encounter did was call her on her bad parenting choice.

minmate
02-23-2008, 07:07 PM
Half the posts on here are SOOO not where I was trying to go with this thread.

However, I do appreciate the comments that stayed more on-topic. I am glad to hear many people are able to shrug off any rudeness they encounter and continue to have fun on vacation! If I find myself in similar circumstances, I hope I can achieve the same!

CoachBagFanatic
02-23-2008, 07:29 PM
I'm starting to miss that thread about the skywriter.

:lmao:

Half the posts on here are SOOO not where I was trying to go with this thread.

However, I do appreciate the comments that stayed more on-topic. I am glad to hear many people are able to shrug off any rudeness they encounter and continue to have fun on vacation! If I find myself in similar circumstances, I hope I can achieve the same!

If a situation should arise (hopefully not) I am sure you will handle yourself with dignity and class. :thumbsup2

GovieMom
02-23-2008, 08:41 PM
I believe that the mom's comments show that she is very sensitive to the way her children's behavior affects others. It was an apology for pete's sake ...

Exactly. Perhaps the mom thought that her kids would be so worn out that they'd nap during the plane ride home, but it backfired instead. She realized it was disruptive to others, so she explained why and apologized. Can't fault her for that!

dreamer17555
02-23-2008, 09:16 PM
I tend to think with rude people there are two ways to go about it (two acceptable ways) 1. Ignore it or 2. Say something. I try to ignore most rude behavior if it isnít directly interfering with me or my children. However if someone plants themselves in front of your children when they have been waiting for a show or parade I tend to say ďExcuse me, would you mind moving, please? You accidentally are blocking my childís view and she has been waiting quiet a long time.Ē I always try to be firm but make it seem like it was just a simple good natured mistake. Though I can be firmer if I need to be (Or if anyone dare injure my child-heaven help them).

I think there are a lot of entitlement issues at Disney. People tend to think that even if they havenít been waiting an hour that they are entitled to a great parade spot and must push to the front. It is their vacation too after all. But other than that I donít see a lot of out and out rudeness at Disney. Sometimes people just mistake stuff as rudeness.

Example of this would be today. My DD6 was at our local playground and there were some boys there with water guns that were getting other children wet. They offered her a gun and I called her down off the playground. I took her to a bench and told her that we donít play with guns (a personal family rule- please no flames) and that it was a little to cool outside so that she needed to give it back but thank the boys anyway. She did so (a little heavy hearted but still) and told the boys ďThank you but its too cold to play with water guns.Ē Well the mom of those boys got so angry. She grabbed them off the playground and marched off and the while ranting about me and my daughter being rude and ruining her sonís day. I did not mean to be rude at all but she mistook it for me judging her parenting. I donít judge other parents but I hold firm to the rules we have in place at our home.

-Becca-

BabyPiglet
02-23-2008, 09:41 PM
I believe that the mom's comments show that she is very sensitive to the way her children's behavior affects others. It was an apology for pete's sake, and children's behavior IMHO is more complicated than rocket science sometimes. I think that the criticism was unwarranted and rude.

Are there really parents of children out there who have never stretched their kids and their own limits...especially on vacation???? Heck , vacation can be taxing for adults. Should kids have to stay home until they adults?

I always get compliments on my kids in public and at their school - how nice they are, well-behaved, mannerly, kind, etc., but no one is perfect, and there is A LOT of pressure on parents to be so.

Unless, the mother (or her children) were directly rude to you, your comments were extremely unkind. Perhaps you would do better to visit a less child-oriented type of vacation spot. You'd be less likely to encounter children on planes.
:thumbsup2 I agree, 100%.

mb1976
02-23-2008, 11:18 PM
When we were at Coral Reef last Sept. they were extremely busy and were way behind seating people. At this point we were past our reservation time by about 45 minutes. Earlier, just as I was checking in, there was a group of six who had tried to check in but, according to the computer their reservations had been canceled. They said they had not cancelled them and of course were upset. Even though the place was packed management vowed to seat them. Well, everyone was way behind in their seating times and the group began to get agitated. They began to complain loudly and began getting very rude. Most folks around understood the place was busy and were being quite cordial. Not this group. They then began to come up with excuses as to why they should be seated immediatly. When they started on the diabetes excuse I lost it. See, I'm pre-diabetic and understand my condition and plan for the unknown. I had a brand new, yet to be opened, package of glucose tabs just in case I began to suffer from hypoglycemia. I promptly walked over to them and offered it. At that point they just looked at me and shut up. I went back and sat down. For the next few minutes they toned it down. But, then the management seated them ahead of folks who had ressies and had been waiting a long time. I don't know if what I did was right but, it shut them up and the people around us were thankful for that.

tnmomof4
02-24-2008, 01:49 AM
Half the posts on here are SOOO not where I was trying to go with this thread.

However, I do appreciate the comments that stayed more on-topic. I am glad to hear many people are able to shrug off any rudeness they encounter and continue to have fun on vacation! If I find myself in similar circumstances, I hope I can achieve the same!


Like I said in my posts, you will meet lots of nice people at Disney. :) I am sure you will be able to shrug off any rudeness. I wouldn't let a rude person ruin my vacation!

mamaLori05
02-24-2008, 07:23 AM
We have been to Disney a few times and have rarely run into rude people. The one time we did we were at a parade and had been waiting for probably 45 minutes or so. Another family of four just down from us had been there before we got there and were spread out on two king size comforters. (Clearly way more room then they needed) and were about two feet away from the curb. You could tell already they were not having a good time as all of them were fighting with each other (and they were all adultish age). As the parade got closer to starting it started to get more and more crowded, and most people were making room for those who were just coming in to see the parade, and letting younger kids up to the front to view the parade. This family of four was making rude comments all over the place about how they were there for so many hours and were not going to budge to let others in to see. (And they totally did not want anyone sitting in that two feet in front of them) I had no problem with them wanting the spot they had, but I did think it was rude that they would not move closer together to make room for other people. If anyone came too close or heaven forbid, stepped on their comforters they had a hissy. They also wanted no part in letting younger kids up to the front to see. Again they were about two feet back from the curb. They were all adults and would still have been able to see even with kids in front of them. Now, don't get me wrong here, I don't agree with people pushing their way up to the front at the last minute, but I don't see anything wrong with letting kids up to the front to see. I also thought that if they didn't want any kids up in front of them, then they should have moved up themselves. Eventually they just got soo mad they left, and the crowd was very happy about that. Everyone was sick of them complaining.

Personally when I run into rude people I find it most successful when I just ignore their comments. I feel they are usually trying to get some rise out of people and just ignoring them usually solves everything.

Oh, and as a side comment, I give huge kuddos to the mommy on the airplane for also ignoring the comment made and walking away.

DeadHead
02-24-2008, 08:53 AM
I wasn't going to write about this but - couldn't help myself. In January my DW took my to WDW for my 55th birthday. We were goiing to ride Space MTN, a mid 30's age woman knocked me to the ground just inside the attractions entrance. I got up, never said a word but did give her an inquiring look. In front of a CM she screamed "what the h*** are you looking at?". She then said "that's what you f****** get for walking slow." Which I was not as the attraction had just opened. I almost lost it. A CM who witnessed this came and took DW and I to the front of the line, she said to make sure I was ok but then put us on the next rocket. At the same time another CM gave a serious polite lecture to the woman. She gave the CM a hard time, security was called and escorted with her family from the park. We found out most of this after we got off the attraction, as security was waiting to ask for our side of the situation. I try to ingnore rudeness, this time I came close to not. I always try to remember that I'm at Disney and there to have fun.

Peg
02-24-2008, 11:32 AM
popcorn::

toocherie
02-24-2008, 01:35 PM
Oh please,

Most people aren't bothered by kids. However, they are bothered by clueless parents.

As parents we have to be mindful of how our child's behavior effects those around us.

We might think it's cute to watch our kids laugh with glee while playing with the ropes in a line. The person that's getting hit by rope may not agree.

We might think it's cute to hear our child sing the ABC song while waiting for lunch. The other Diners may not agree.

We might think it's cute to let our child play with a spray bottle in a crowded area. The people getting sprayed may not agree.

Most people will bite their tongue and let it go. Others will comment on it.

I love kids. I'm trapped in a room with 21 five-year-old each day. :teacher:

I expect kids to behave like kids (not mini-adults). I also expect parents to parent.

I think this was very well said . . . . the issue isn't usually the children, it's the parents who think that EVERYONE else should kowtow to them because, after all they're a family and in a "family" place. Just because you're in an environment friendly to kids doesn't mean that having consideration for others should go out the window. WDW/Disneyland was meant by Walt Disney for everyone . . . . not just families with kids.

toocherie
02-24-2008, 01:46 PM
I had a situation with a rude CM yesterday at Disneyland. I have been eyeing a Hidden Mickey ring at the jewelry store and had decided to buy it--I went in yesterday and asked for it in my ring size, but they didn't have one in the case . . . I asked the CM to please check to see if they had it in stock and she said to me "well, are you really going to buy it, because it will mean calling a manager and everything . . . . "

First, I looked at her in shock and disbelief (along with the friend with me and another customer). And then I asked for another CM to wait on me because it was obvious she had no interest in customer service.

I waited for another CM who did call the manager, and they were great (unfortunately didn't have the ring though . . . . )

dwaters
02-24-2008, 02:38 PM
From what I have seen in all of the "Rude Guests" threads here on the DIS, it seems that 80% of the stories take place around parade seating. This is why I don't stress about seeing parades- they can't possibly be worth all the hassle involved.
It's really too bad Disney can't come up with a solution, since they have daily parades in all their parks. I don't know what they could do about people fighting over spots and blocking others' views. Portable bleachers? Not very practical....I guess be more proactive in letting guests know about good behavior (like those signs in WDW bathrooms on how to wash your hands)

toocherie
02-24-2008, 02:51 PM
I also don't do the parades or the fireworks unless I am partaking in a tour or something where I get preferred seating--in my case it's because I have two artificial knees and can't easily get up and down off the ground.

Good observation on your part that parades seem to generate a lot of the issues--again it's the "entitlement" issue some people have that they have paid for their ticket, why shouldn't they be able to show up 5 minutes before the parade and get a good view?

The other area that seems to be the genesis of rudeness are strollers and ECV use. I have to say from the perspective of someone who has on occasion used an ECV that it is unbelievable the number of people that dart in front of you like you're not even there--rivaled only by the threads I have read where people have crawled over children in strollers to get where they want to go. So I think there's rudeness on both sides (both the stroller/ECV drivers and those around them).

GrowingUpDisney
02-24-2008, 04:23 PM
What if someone is deliberately rude to a parent with a tired, cranky kid? :confused3 :)
Do we need another thread for that?? just kidding.

I agree...I've been in so many situations with my kids during which their behavior and/or my reaction could be confusing for curious on-lookers. But at the end of the day, I am the best judge as to how to handle my own children, and other parents are usually the same for theirs. It's extremely rude for strangers to comment on others' ability to parent, and that's why the above conversation took place.

I completely agree - especially when said "person" doesn't have children but knows how to parent them. :rolleyes:

martina857
02-24-2008, 04:50 PM
Know what ? Some of you people NEED to learn some tolerance !

Martina

merryweather20
02-24-2008, 05:01 PM
Umm, I was NOT the poster who experienced this. And I don't think that kids should stay home, and I know that kids sometimes act up. The difference being that this parent did something that they HAD to know would not end with their kids being well behaved. The parents basically set their kids up to be cranky and unruley, and then were like oh well, what can you do. What you can do is NOT run your child until they are exhausted. There is no excuse to do so, and then to throw said child on a plane and think that they will somehow be little angels is just stupid, no other word.

And I don't take that mom's comments as an apology. To me it sounded like she was making an excuse for their bad behavior, and all the person who posted that encounter did was call her on her bad parenting choice.

I don't understand how you can think the children's behaviour was predictable :confused3 My Mom would do the same thing so that we would be sound asleep on the plane.

I don't fault the original poster for making his/her comments though he/she sounded like they were just cranky from a long day at the parks:rolleyes:

CapeCodMouse
02-24-2008, 05:45 PM
We have only encountered a few rude people on our past few trips to WDW. We have chosen to ignore them. If they want to stoop so low, go ahead. No skin off my nose. I refuse to stoop to their level. We always sit down with my DS6 before going on any trip and review the "rules" - use your manners, be aware of people around you, no whining, etc. Most of the time, HE's the one that points out rude behavior (as in "Mom, did you SEE that person? How RUDE! :lmao: ) Usually we only have to remind him a couple of times.

We DO NOT do the parades in Disney-- period. It's just not worth it. ;)

EMom
02-24-2008, 05:46 PM
I wasn't going to write about this but - couldn't help myself. In January my DW took my to WDW for my 55th birthday. We were goiing to ride Space MTN, a mid 30's age woman knocked me to the ground just inside the attractions entrance. I got up, never said a word but did give her an inquiring look. In front of a CM she screamed "what the h*** are you looking at?". She then said "that's what you f****** get for walking slow." Which I was not as the attraction had just opened. I almost lost it. A CM who witnessed this came and took DW and I to the front of the line, she said to make sure I was ok but then put us on the next rocket. At the same time another CM gave a serious polite lecture to the woman. She gave the CM a hard time, security was called and escorted with her family from the park. We found out most of this after we got off the attraction, as security was waiting to ask for our side of the situation. I try to ingnore rudeness, this time I came close to not. I always try to remember that I'm at Disney and there to have fun.


Kudos to the CMs/security who escorted this family of "rudies" (my DD's term) out of the park! :thumbsup2 They deserve a halo and a bonus. If this consequence happened more often, I believe we'd see less knocking over, stroller ramming, line-cutting, stepping on people waiting for parades, etc. ::yes::

That being said, except for Little Miss Ram My Foot :scared: we didn't run into much rudeness at all. A bit of cluelessness at times, but who isn't guilty of that when you're map-staring or trying to figure out if it's the regular entry or fast pass entry? No harm done. A few times, when dining was very crowded, a loud person would come in and demand to be seated immediately since they were staying at that resort. So yes, I'm the one who piped up and said sweetly, "Oh my goodness, we ALL have reservations. Isn't that right? (Looking at the crowd and getting some of them to nod along.) But you are more than welcome to wait here with us. Have a seat." Sometimes I would even point out the people in the group who were also staying at that resort, so they'd realize they were in good company. The CMs loved me. :rotfl2: So did the other people in line.

Yes, people bumped into me occasionally. They apologized and I accepted. I bumped into folks a few times myself and did the same. There's a world of difference between an honest accident and an intentional ramming. I think a common theme I see is that parents.....especially mothers....often go all mother bear when someone intentionally or carelessly hurts their child. That's just nature. If some clod steps on our child to get a better seat at a parade and couldn't care less that they hurt them, if they intentionally ram our child with an empty stroller just so they can gain an advantage of a few feet, if they knock our kid over to get past them so they can get on a ride faster.....Yes, we tend to get riled up. Not all of us, but many. It is the most basic instinct of a mother to protect their child.....even at WDW. Maybe especially at WDW. :rotfl2: (I can't speak for fathers, since I'm not one.) I've seen women who were so mild mannered that they would not say boo to a goose go medieval when someone hurt their child.

Since you have scads of kids at WDW plus scads of people who feel a strong sense of entitlement due to having paid a lot of money for a vacation, (as if ALL of us didn't pay a lot of money too!) you have a potentially volatile situation. Add several months of intense heat and crowded conditions and it's easy to see why things often get tense. But I think most people can forgive honest accidents when the person apologizes. It's when the person did something on purpose OR when they did it accidentally, but then get an attitude and refuse to apologize that things get ugly. :sad2:

sbpuckett
02-24-2008, 05:58 PM
I really don't remember any rudeness from our last trip so if it happened, it wasn't major - we ignored it - life has went on. However, I have had instances at local parks where people were rude to my children (running them over, pushing them out of the way, etc) and I can't ignore those things. I normally (loudly) tell the person (as they keep walking) excuse us, just go ahead and run over him next time! They always look back but never apologize. Now, I've had people bump into my children, I've had strollers rammed into my heels or run over my toes, etc but if it appears to be accidental (even if they just aren't paying attention..) I tend to ignore those things or I'll say Excuse me instead... Like most mothers (probably parents in general) being rude to me is one thing but being rude to my children is a completely different situation.

Now, in quite honesty... I'd really like to read more stories on the subject and how people handle it. I think a lot of us would rather not read anymore about the mommy on the plane... not trying to start anything... just trying to turn the thread back around and let bygones be bygones:flower3:

GothTink
02-24-2008, 06:10 PM
I think we might all need a nap now :rotfl:

CanadianGuy
02-24-2008, 07:20 PM
This thread does. Consider it closed.