i feel so lost and numb right now

[Mrs.viv07]

a feww months ago i posted the best news of my life, i was having a baby, on valentine's day my world came crashing down when i was told my baby was gone
i am sorry for being a downer but so many of you were there to congratulate me i figured i could get some support now in the worse time.

as to not take up too much space here i created a blog feel free to read,comment, or whatever. I just needed and outlet.

http://vivnmichaelsworld.blogspot.com/

thanks for listening

[Tricia1103]

I'm so sorry for your heartache. I know the pain of losing a baby all too well and it's miserable and terrible and something I STILL think about 8 years later. Hang in there...it does get easier. (HUG)

[Rylee]

a feww months ago i posted the best news of my life, i was having a baby, on valentine's day my world came crashing down when i was told my baby was gone
i am sorry for being a downer but so many of you were there to congratulate me i figured i could get some support now in the worse time.

as to not take up too much space here i created a blog feel free to read,comment, or whatever. I just needed and outlet.

http://vivnmichaelsworld.blogspot.com/

thanks for listening

I am very sorry for your loss. :hug:

[Disflyer]

I can only imagine the pain you are feeling right now. I am very sorry for your loss. Take comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this tragedy. My prayers and sympathy go out to you and your family. I know all too well the pain of trying to start a family, DW and I have been TTC for 3+ years with well over a dozen failed IUIs and IVFs.

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

I am so sorry, DH & I have had to experience this 2 times and the pain is overwhelming. Please know time does heal and right now get a strong support system and take care of yourself.:grouphug:

[kimis]

I am very sorry for the pain you are having right now! I had five miscarriages but I am mom to three wonderful sons. I always said God gave me the three children He wanted me to have here on earth and the other five are in heavon waiting for me. Take time to feel the loss and remember you aren't alone. My sons are all grown now and married to wonderful women. I have 4 granddaughters and one grandson. I love being a grandma.
One thing is for sure when you loss something you love so much you never take life for granted. I have also buried two brothers and my mom. Life is precious, make each day its best and most important make memories for yourself and those around you.
You and your family are in my prayers!

[Kaler131]

I am so sorry to hear of your loss.:sad1: Hang in there.:grouphug: My best friend's sister and her husband tried for YEARS and had many, many miscarriages. She even carried the last one to almost 5 months....then they were belssed with BEAUTIFUL, healthy twins! They had a boy & a girl...they just turned two this past December. :goodvibes My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[ENSOCK]

:grouphug: :hug: Know that you are not alone. The pain does ease but you never forget. I lost 3 but have 2 beautiful boys!

[Scot-n-Michelle]

I am so--- sorry and i feel your pain :grouphug: 8 years ago i also had a miscarriage and reading your blog brought back so- many emotions!!! you are in my thoughts and prayers - may the future bring only the best to you and your family!!!

[Aliceacc]

So many of us have been there at one time.

You have my most sincere sympathies!

[DizzDoll]

I'm so sorry for your loss. My mom had a miscarriage many, many years ago and I remember her heartache. Hang in there, we love you and are keeping you in our prayers!:grouphug:

[MAKHayes-DisneyDiva]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sending thoughts, prayers, and a little Pixie Dust your way.

[zippy doo dah]

I am so sorry for your loss - nothing will make your pain any easier - just know that there are many of us here who have expereinced your pain and we are here if you need to vent some more :grouphug:

[southtexasmom]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[I Love Pluto]

:grouphug:
Know that we care.

[lovetoscrap]

Kaylajr and I extend our deepest sympathy and prayers to you and your family. :grouphug: Hold on to the support of family and friends and seek the love and support that you need during this time. :hug:

[Avalon_toon]

I am very sorry for your loss.

[DreamDelta]

:hug: Sending out prayers to you and your husband.

[MelanieRI]

Vivian,

I read your blog and I am so sorry about the loss of your baby. I hope that writing about it helps you to deal with your grief. I know it helped me a lot. I found such wonderful support on some miscarriage boards online. I will always remember those ladies for that. Remember to listen to your heart and not let good intentioned peoples' sayings get to you if it doesn't mesh with how you feel about your loss. People can say many a cruel thing thinking it is going to help, but just because it helps them doesn't mean that it helps you. I lost six pregnancies between 8 and 23 weeks before having my daughter, Allison, who is now 9. I had an autoimmune disorder called antiphospholipid antibodies and took heparin to carry DD to term. So, miracles do happen and hopefully, you will have another miracle when you try to get pregnant again and will carry the baby to term. Good-luck!

[DVCJones]

So sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. :grouphug: :hug:

[JoanieS]

I am so sorry for your loss. I know all too well the feeling.

((((HUGS))))

[pwdebbie]

Vivian, you express yourself so well on your blog. I wanted to reach out and wrap my arms around you and hold you tight and just let you cry. It's ok to grieve, don't apologize for it, just let yourself grieve.

When my daughter-in-law's first baby died, very similar to how your little one died, I gave her a lily on the baby's due date, and I gave one to myself also. Every year, we each have a lily blooming in our yard to remind us of the baby that we never got to hold. If you can, maybe you could do something to remember your little "peanut" too. It's ok to remember.

Deb

[magsnden]

i, too, know the feeling all too well. it is something you never plan for and almost can't believe it's true. i had 2 miscarriages, and all the kind words in the world don't make you feel any better, right now, and so many people don't know what to say. some of those things may actually even be true, but you don't need or want to hear them.

please know, that the feeling of loss won't ever go away completely, but it does get better over time. and in some ways it is good to remember, to know that you have an angel looking over you, to protect you. take the time to grieve and get through this - you need this time.

i'll keep you in my prayers. :hug:

[pepperderr]

and I wasn't here to congratulate you, but I wanted to say I am sorry for your loss. I do know how it feels because my first baby was stillborn. Going to your blog site was nice. I read the poem about the baby in heaven. Stuff like that comforts me. I know when it first happened to me I didn't feel like it would ever get better, but you do eventually learn to live with it. (((HUGS))). I wish I could take away your pain but I share in it!

[disneybell]

My heart breaks for you. I am so very sorry for your loss. You are in my prayers.

[WDWBetsy]

I am so sorry! I read your blog - it was very touching and I'm in tears. Please know that you and your husband are in my prayers.

:hug:

[MousekaMaddi]

you are all in our thoughts Viv.

[Flametamr]

Im very sorry for your pain.

[Amyz00]

I am so sorry about your loss. As the majority of the posts have said, you are not alone. :hug: I have lost two babies and it is something that you will never forget. I also know how bad it is to loose one on a "holiday" - I lost my last one on Mother's Day. But with such loss and sadness came my happiness - our three beautiful children. So you hang in there, okay. :grouphug:

[Kim in SPR]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost my second baby at birth. It's been 14 years and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think of her. The absolute most important thing for you right now is to find support from those who know what you're going through. Find a pregnancy loss support group around you and go. It's the hardest thing to take that step but its so important that you connect with people who have been there and can help you understand your emotions. I'm sure right now you feel very isolated and alone.

The pain and devastation will ease with time and support. :grouphug:

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

Mrs. Viv as I posted earlier I am so sad for you.......and thought and prayed for you last night.
After reading these posts it is amazing that other stories can bring you right back to the minute or minutes when your life would change and your dream can disappear in a minute.
I think it is so wonderful and heart warming that we can come together and comfort each other. I just wanted to thank everyone for sharing and I am honored to be part of a group of such compassionate and kind women.

[crazytp93]

I am so sorry. Words cannot say how sorry I am for you.

:sad1:

[Family Fun Mom]

I read your blog and it was like reliving my own experience. I feel your pain so strongly. I lost my first baby when I was 14 weeks along. That was 12 years ago and I still think about it. The birth of my daughter two years later brought incredible healing to me, and then I had two sons to fill my heart as well, but I still think about my first child. The pain fades, but you will always carry the love you have for that child in your heart. The love never goes away.

I am truly so sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you.

[dawz1026]

I lost one at 6 months then again at 4 months and kept going...Michael is 20 months now...DON'T GIVE UP!:angel:

[nurse.darcy]

I have been taking care of a woman who has been married to her sweetheart for 10 years. She has been trying to conceive for 5. I don't work in OB, I am an ICU nurse. She conceived via IVF and is now 18 weeks pregnant. Why is she in ICU? She developed a condition since becoming pregnant that ROBS you of your plasma and red blood cells called TTP. She is receiving packed red blood cells every other day and Plasmapheresis daily for the next 5 days. The wierd thing about all of this is the baby is HEALTHY in utero. But The mom may not survive to see her baby born into this world. Be thankful that you had a chance and that hopefully soon, actually probably very soon one you you will sit here and contemplate that one more baby

[larryz]

My sincere condolences on your loss.

I lost an older brother when my mom miscarried a year before I was born. Not that I don't love my older and younger sisters, but sometimes I stop and wonder how different my life would have been with the older brother I never had -- or, when I'm feeling especially philosophical, whether or not I would even be here.

My best wishes for a quick healing for you and your family.

[magsnden]

My sincere condolences on your loss.

I lost an older brother when my mom miscarried a year before I was born. Not that I don't love my older and younger sisters, but sometimes I stop and wonder how different my life would have been with the older brother I never had -- or, when I'm feeling especially philosophical, whether or not I would even be here.

My best wishes for a quick healing for you and your family.

i posted earlier, but forgot to mention this very real thought. i miscarried before becoming pregnant with my daughter, and also miscarried before getting pregnant with my son.

it was sooooo difficult to get through both of those losses, but because they are looking over us rather than here in the physical, we are blessed with these 2 beautiful, healthy children. perhaps if that never had happened, i wouldn't have had these 2. i wouldn't have known these perfect people.

i know that hardly helps, but there is a meaning behind it, no matter how hard it is to recognize right now. the meaning may never show itself to us, but keep that faith that i saw on your blog. and keep trying!!! it will happen. i will keep you and your husband in my prayers.