The Emotional Eater's Journal

[DisTeacher07]

Hey Ya'll

I'm Kristen and I'm 22 years old. I just graduated college (full fledged teacher, without a classroom or students... yet) and I am stressed out between substitute teaching, part time work at the library I've worked in since before high school (who's decided to maybe cut my hours this summer), my best friend and "therapist" (hi Jen!) being so far away, and a crazy family. HI, I'M KRISTEN AND I'M AN EMOTIONAL EATER!

I've never had such issues with weight since I started college. Now, 4 years later, I absolutly hate my body. I keep making deals with myself... the current one, lose 10 pounds by Thanksgiving and I can go to Disney, but nothing works!

My bestest buddy, Blueeyes101817, told me:
"you know what though, the people are so nice and when you "fall off the wagon" they help...plus, i feel like when im posting, i hold myself more accountable"
so I hope it holds true for me.

Now that this has become the longest post ever, and No, I'm not a big poster, I need to establish some goals. So.....

1. Exercise at least 45 minutes a day, 5 days a week
2. Lay off the soda (i'm not totally giving it up, you can't make me)
3. Completely forgoing ice cream (my nemesis)
4. Making healthier choices, and NO eating in front of the TV

What are your goals? Should I add anything? TIA

[Blueeyes101817]

Hi Kristen--SO glad you started a journal!I really think youll find it is going to help ya

I love how i was quoted in your first post--now thats a best friend :goodvibe:

Now, we are BOTH going to get in shape and look good for our next disney trip--whenever that may be ? hint hint hint

I would say go for 1 soda a day--really cut back, i think youll be surprised how big of a difference that may make...

Hang in there, and try to post here daily!!

[MIdanceMom]

Hi Kristen,

Welcome to the WISH journals. Your goals look great, and a trip is an awesome incentive. Jen is right, just don't tell her I said so. The people here are amazing.

Good Luck!
Beth

[kimwim8]

Hi Kristen and welcome to the DIS WISH journals! :goodvibes

I see why you and Jen are such good friends.....you both love ice cream! :laughing: I'm just kidding....congrats on taking the steps towards a healthier you! We're here for you during the good and bad (we ALL have the bad, trust me!)

Your plan looks great, and I'm sure you'll be well on your way by Thanksgiving. :thumbsup2

Take care, and keep posting!

[DisTeacher07]

Thank you ladies... and don't worry, I would never tell Jen that she's right. I'd never hear the end of it (just kidding Jen!)

Thank you for all your support. I've already mapped out tomorrow so that if I don't succeed I'll feel guilty about it and work harder (dumb I know, but it'll work!)

I have to sub tomorrow (math!) in the morning for half a day, so as soon as I get home I'll do 45 minutes of Tae Bo. Turkey sandwich, water and apple slices for lunch. Then work at the library so more water and a peanut butter sandwich. We'll see how that works out.

Til tomorrow.....

[Blueeyes101817]

I see why you and Jen are such good friends.....you both love ice cream! :laughing: !

Jen is right, just don't tell her I said so.


and don't worry, I would never tell Jen that she's right. I'd never hear the end of it (just kidding Jen!)


MEANIES MEANIES MEANIES ;)

\and kim--i love ice cream, buth avent had any in 2 weeks!

[MIdanceMom]

Hi Kristen,

Yep, that is me MEANIE!

Your plan looks awesome. Good luck with the math classes. If that is not enough food for you today, you may want to add a couple of healthy snacks in there.

Take care,
Beth

[toystoryduo]

Welcome Kristen!:cool1:

Your plan for today looks like a good one!:goodvibes

Have a great Wednesday!:hug:

[Caitsmama]

Welcome to the DIS Kristen!! This group of girls is AMAZING!! And so very inspiring! You sound like you have a plan and i am sure you can do it!

[larry's girl]

Hi, Kristen. Hope you were able to stay with your plan today and that you had a good one. Keep going - you can do it!

Susan

[postesf]

Hi Kristen! Welcome to DIS WISH JOURNALING!!!!! :banana: I do find this really helps me a tremendous amount. You will get a huge amount of support here. You can do this!

Best of luck!
Stacie

[DisTeacher07]

Hi everyone! And thanks for your support. Jen was right, I do feel tremendously guilty for falling off track already and having all of you know it.

Yesterday I didn't exercise at all. I subbed until 11:00, then I slept until I went to work at the library til 4. At 8:30 when I got back home I went back to sleep. Food wise I did good. I had soup and crackers and lots of water for lunch, an apple for a snack, and london broil on a biscuit for dinner. And only 1/2 can of soda!!!

Today, so far, not so hot. I really need to exercise but I am so exhausted. I had a peanut butter sandwich for lunch with water (it was really hard to pick water when coke was right there for cheaper!!), the other half of the can of soda for a snack, and a kit-kat! (oops!) I know my boyfriend wants to go out for ice cream later too. I'll have to look into frozen yogurt.

Sorry I screwed up already! I'll do better... I promise. And I have to check out all of your journals. Thanks for everything!

[Caitsmama]

That's ok!! You didn't do terrible! I think when you try to quit everything, it will just sabotage you.. just start by making small choices, which you are doing already! Eventually, you will be going for that water b/c you WANT to, :) I PROMISE!!

[Blueeyes101817]

Hey-

Just remember--BABY STEPS! you cant do it all at once so small steps are key
im proud of you for s tarting--and way to go on 1/2 can of soda

you will do this, dont owrry!

[kimwim8]

That's ok!! You didn't do terrible! I think when you try to quit everything, it will just sabotage you.. just start by making small choices, which you are doing already! Eventually, you will be going for that water b/c you WANT to, :) I PROMISE!!

Couldn't agree more! You're taking steps in the right direction. Just think about what a "normal" day used to be for you...and compare that to today. I'll bet you blew away your old normal day, right? (That's what I do myself to put things in perspective). Don't be too hard on yourself.

I'm proud of you for going for the water instead of the soda today! :thumbsup2 It sounds like you really like your soda...and so that was a BIG step in the right direction. :woohoo: No one says you have to quit all of the stuff you love...moderation is the key. :thumbsup2

Keep up the great work!

Oh, and I think I personally over-do it with the water. My nutritionist told me that I should be drinking 1/2 my body weight in ounces of water per day and no more (can cause kidney problems and other issues). But I push it because I know it helps me lose weight. It's a sickness I have. :sad2: So, don't inspire to be like me and my water habit. :laughing:

[Blueeyes101817]

So where have you been buddy? hows it going?

[DisTeacher07]

not going so hot... I am recommiting myself after I get home from work (about 15 minutes)... I'm sorry, but 10 hours working in a hot library with NO patrons entitles me to a bit of candy!

Tomorrow I sub until 3:30, then I'm taking the dog for a one hour walk and I am really going to diet today!

[kimwim8]

Hey Kristen. Don't get down on yourself. We ALL slip or have treats now and then. As long as you're healthier and working towards being a healthier person, then you're on the right track. :thumbsup2 I don't think anyone here is 100% on at all times.

Enjoy that walk and keep your chin up. :goodvibes

[Caitsmama]

Kristen, I very rarely have a *perfect* day, lol.. But, i think the main thing, is instead of reaching for 2 handfuls of candy - just reach for 1. ;) Baby steps to start.. then before you know it, you won't WANT that 1!! :)

And remember, each day brings a brand new start.

[Blueeyes101817]

how was today ? trieid calling ya, and you didnt answer

thanks for letting me have a meltdown last night--appreciateit

[kimwim8]

Hey Kristen. Don't give up on us! We're here for you. Stop back and let us know how you're doing. :goodvibes

[postesf]

Hey Kristen! Just checking in. Hope things are looking up for you!! :flower3:

Stacie

[DisTeacher07]

Hey everybody! Thank you all for checking in, you're such wonderful people! I'm sorry I havent been around, I definitly will be from now on!!!

The walk didn't work out for me the other day. My friend's truck broke down and I had to run down to the high school to pick up her daughter (who called me in a panic!). Gina, the kid, used to be my aid in catechism. She's like another little sister. However... we BOTH resisted the urge to stop in at Burger King, which is only a step behind WDW as far as we're concerned.

This substituting thing is killing me. I get home exhausted, or I rush like a maniac to my other job and don't get home til 8 or 9, and then I just want to sleep. I've been trying to get my jobs ahead of time (personal days) so I don't have to wake up at 5am to find out where I'm going and which teacher is sick. Today I'm doing a half day with first grade, who I absolutly love!

What do you all think about exercising later at night? I haven't heard of anyone doing it, but it seems thats when I get my second wind. Mornings are crazy, and after work I'm dead to the world. We're talking like right before or after dinner.

I haven't been eating less, but definitly healthier, so that's a small step, but a step right?? My boyfriend's been less than supportive, tonight he wants to go to get chicken wings. I've wanted to go to this bar all summer to get wings and we didn't go... now I don't want to eat it and he couldn't care less. I'm kind of mad.

Anywho... now that you've gotten my complete life story :rotfl: I have to get ready for work. I'll definitly check in more often. Thanks for your continued support! I'm picking up a scale tonight... hows that for motivation? :lmao: Good luck to all of you with your goals!

[Blueeyes101817]

eating healthier is an awesome step--im proud of you! Did you tell Kyle that you really want to watch what you eat and all that? I would say if you told him and hes still pushing for stuff you dont want to eat--dont go out with him that nght--maybe then he will see you really are serious about it and he will support ya

Or just move to jersey and you got me..and kim ;)

Did you get that scale? DONT DRIVE YOURSELF CRAZY going on the scale everyday! Pick one day a week and stick to it then..you know?

ill call you in a bit!

[MIdanceMom]

Hi there,

Sorry I haven't checked in lately. How did things go with the 1st graders? As for Kyle, you do know that guys like to fix things, right? Have you tried to ask him to help you avoid unhealthy eating. You'll have to tell him flat out what you need from him. Guys just don't get things that are subtle. A billboard may get the point across.

Take care,
Beth

Oh yeah, my DH is a night time exerciser. You can try it. My only concern is that it would be hard to fall and stay asleep. It does work for DH, though.

[Blueeyes101817]

Where are you kris? got your message, its been nuts so ill call you tomorrow night..you going to be around?

[MIdanceMom]

Hi Kristen,

I hope all is well with you.

Have a good weekend,
Beth

[kimwim8]

Hey Kristen. Great job with the healthy eating!! That's a good step in the right direction. Also, awesome willpower when avoiding the wings that you've wanted all summer. :woohoo: I don't know that I'd be that strong. :rolleyes1

As far as exercising - any exercise you get in - morning, day or night - is good for you. You do it when it works for you. :thumbsup2

[Caitsmama]

Hi Kristen, just checking in on you and wishing you well! :)

[Blueeyes101817]

you better come check in!

by the way--got your card in the mail--loved t!

[DisTeacher07]

Alright, alright, I'm checking in! You Dis people are just too stinkin nice!!! :lmao: Exercise is still a problem for me as I am ALWAYS tired. My schedule is something like: wake up, go to school, drive like a maniac to the library where I look for a job at a school for the next day and work, get home, sleep, start again.

Healthy choices wise, I do great when I'm at school. Probably because I can't leave. Even the library isn't that bad (however holiday season is coming and then all we do is eat while our patrons do their Christmas shopping and don't come in to get books). Also, we had a computer meltdown last weekend and basically 2/3rds of the items we own are out of the library and we don't know with who or for how long, so everyone pray they come back! I spent Saturday being Nancy Drew and I'm doing the same this evening. I have a list 46 pages long of things to find. Needless to say, there was candy, chips, and soda on Saturday... I NEEDED IT!

I think I"ll take an early dinner at work tonight and take a walk while it's still light, but its cold out there! Thanks everyone for checking in. I'll try harder.

Kim-- dont get excited about the wings... I ate them, the place was packed, they were already cooked, and I was starving. However, I didn't get that martini I was dreaming about!

[kimwim8]

Kim-- dont get excited about the wings... I ate them, the place was packed, they were already cooked, and I was starving. However, I didn't get that martini I was dreaming about!

You GO girl. That's what I would've done. If not, I would have been dreaming about them! :laughing: (just ask Jen, I'm not always a good influence ;) )

Sorry to hear about the library computer system. That doesn't sound good. :headache:

[DisTeacher07]

Hey all! I'm checking in, as promised! Today went really well. I didn't eat too much, and what I did eat was healthy. I even exercised for like 20 minutes... baby steps right?

Now listen to (okay, read) this!! My boyfriend, mother and I were just sitting at our kitchen table, lights in the house are visible from the road! We're stuffing candy bags for Halloween tomorrow and my house was SHOT at!! The cops just left, not that they do anything around here, but still, how terrifying! I just called in to work to tell them that I will not be in tomorrow as I am not leaving my mother here alone and she told me-- are you ready?-- come in to work, bring your mom with you. I politely told her no way, I have sick time, I'm staying home, but still?!? Hello- I'll come home and our house will be burning down for not having any candy!!

[MIdanceMom]

:hug: Kristen,

Thank God you are all right! THat must be terrifying. Does it happen often in your neighborhood? EEK! Your boss is unbelievable. What is your mom going to do while you work. COme ON!

Take care of yourself tonight,
Beth

[Blueeyes101817]

Scary kris! i got all nervous when you texted me last night! hope everything is okay..and you deserve a day off anyway!

[MIdanceMom]

:hug: Kristen,

I am just checkig in to see if you are ok.

Take care,
Beth

[postesf]

Hey Kristen! Just checking in! What the heck? Someone shot at your house??? Hope you guys are alright!!!

Stacie

[DisTeacher07]

Hey guys! Thanks for checking in. We're all okay. The stupid cop asked what I do and I answered that I'm a library clerk and a substitute teacher. He said "Well that explains it! Just some kids getting back at you" Yeah, like its my fault. Anywho... hope everyone is good. Exercising isn't happening here, but I am eating better, so hopefully when things calm down I'll start exercising.

[Caitsmama]

Kristen - OMG!! That is horrible!! Glad to hear you are all ok.. wow! (Ya, must have been those kids with the overdue library books -- geez!!) I can't believe the cop would say that... like what difference does it make WHY someone would do that -- the fact is that they DID it!

[Blueeyes101817]

no more shootings right my dear? It was great talking to you on the phone today--even thought it was for 2 min! Talk to ya later

[MIdanceMom]

Hope you are having a great weekend, Kristen.

Take care,
Beth

[postesf]

Just checking in... Hope things are good for you!

Stacie

[MIdanceMom]

Hey Kristen,

I hope all is well.

have a good weekend.
Beth

[AlyssinWonderland]

:eek: That is so scarry. Getting shot at on Halloween! MY Goodness... I started reading your journal because it's said something about being an emotional eater...and wow am I on that train... Sounds like you are doing pretty good so far though! I'd have eatten the fridge after being shot at... good job! Thanks for sharing. :flower3:

[DisTeacher07]

I have had the week from HELL! So naturally, I have eaten everything in sight. First off- I worked 60 hours this week. I had the class from hell the other day. One kid went to the office TWICE. I met the teacher the day before, and she warned me that people have literally walked out in the middle of lessons because her kids are such animals. Then, I got home yesterday to find out that we were taking my 8 year old dog to the ASPCA we got her from when I was in 8th grade because she is so sick that we can't take care of her, the vet can't find out whats wrong with her, and won't put her to sleep and out of her misery. I've been crying ever since. No one will adopt her, she looks terrible and can't even sit down. I'm hoping that they'll put her down and she'll go to heaven and be in peace very soon. Last, my boyfriend's father choked on a pretzel today at work and fell out of his chair when he blacked out. He has a black eye, thought he was standing up when he was laying on the floor, and has a golfball sized knot coming out his head. He won't go to the doctor.

Does it ever end??? Sorry I didn't post sooner. Thanks everyone for checking in!

[Blueeyes101817]

sorry things are nuts--tehy will get better !!!

[postesf]

WOW Kristen. Sorry things are so hectic right now!!! 60 hours! Whew!

I hope things things start looking up soon for you!!! :flower3:

Stacie

[AlyssinWonderland]

I'm wishing you some pixie dust for today! :wizard: I hope it helps! :flower3:

[Blueeyes101817]

hey! I really wish i would have thought about it and you could have come over today--one of those days i just needed my best friend--damn distance!!

Hope everything is going okay--get online and tell me whats new ...miss ya

talk to you soon

[larry's girl]

Hi, Kristen. Sorry things are so crazy for you right now. Just remember: All you can do is the best you can do! Try to take care of yourself as much as you can and make the best choices you can with your diet and exercise plans, but don't stress about it!:) Things will get better!

Here's hoping today is a good one for you.

Susan

[Blueeyes101817]

Happy thanksgiving!

[DisTeacher07]

Happy Turkey Day everyone!

I ate WAY too much today. Trying to start the whole thing over tomorrow, wish me luck!

[MIdanceMom]

Hi Kristen,

I'm sorry that things have been so hectic for you. Hopefully things will settle down.

Take care,
Beth

[larry's girl]

Hi, Kristen! Hey, just go from here - don't worry about what happened yesterday. You can make the changes you want to make - we're all here to help cheer you on! I understand where you're coming from, though - since I hurt my back, it has been progressively harder for me to eat smaller portions. It is an ongoing battle, but we're all here fighting it together.

Here's hoping today was a good one for you!

Susan

[postesf]

Hey there! Just checking in! Hope all is well with you!!!

Stacie