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straightj23
06-22-2007, 07:42 PM
Hey guys! Felt like being random today. So, tell your favorite Chuck Norris joke or jokes. Mine is:

"Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits."

lol

And just in case you aren't familiar, here's a website you can check out:

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

PurpleDucky
06-22-2007, 07:49 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't check for the Boogeyman in his closet
The Boogeyman checks for Chuck Norris in his closet

MyHappyEnding_
06-22-2007, 07:55 PM
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

BandGeek911
06-22-2007, 08:18 PM
Once Chuck Norris' wife burned the turkey on thanksgiving, he told her not to worry, he went in the backyard, and came back five minutes later with a turkey. He then ate it whole, and then threw it up a few seconds later fully cooked with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked me how he had done it he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said “Never question chuck norris”

STOPxmickeytime
06-22-2007, 08:44 PM
chuck norris once roundhouse kicked a baby elephant into puberty.

Captain Brain
06-22-2007, 09:17 PM
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Mur13
06-22-2007, 09:36 PM
Chck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because he's afraid of th dark. The dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

jessaboo
06-22-2007, 09:54 PM
When it's time for taxes to be paid, all Chuck has to do is send in a picture of himself, and the government sends back your money to him.


Chuck Norris is really 164 years old.
Rogain works.

bgirldeb
11-22-2007, 05:51 AM
*bump*
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
.
Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.
.
Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

Pirate Me
11-22-2007, 07:59 AM
I'm sorry but am I the only one that doesn't get these? xD

DramaQueen
11-22-2007, 08:33 AM
lmao! these are hilarious.

sooo random.

(L) chuck norris (L)

disney100666
11-22-2007, 08:58 AM
I'm sorry but am I the only one that doesn't get these? xD

I don't get them either. I honestly don't even know who Chuck Norris is.

SBubba18
11-22-2007, 03:52 PM
In 8th grade, we had a saying.."What will Chuck Noris do? Kick some a**!"

Rockstar mentality
11-22-2007, 04:33 PM
"Chuck norris does not get wet, the water gets Chuck Norrissed.'

haha and my second favorite is:

"one day Chuck Norris woke up and decided 2 sell his pee, it is now known as red bull.

Damhsa04
11-22-2007, 04:34 PM
I love this one:

Chuck Norris' tears cure AIDS. Too bad Chuck Norris doesn't cry.

Ms.Squeakers
11-22-2007, 04:38 PM
When did this ever start is what Im wondering...

Because I feel like it only started popping up like..2 years ago

AND PLUS

Walker Texas Ranger

was an awesome show

(after all Ricky Bobby named his kids "walker" and "Texas Ranger" XD)

Rockstar mentality
11-22-2007, 04:39 PM
lol i think some random person portrayed him as aamazing and starte dmaking jokes about how good he is and i catched on with his friends then everyone was doing it

Ms.Squeakers
11-22-2007, 04:48 PM
lol i think some random person portrayed him as aamazing and starte dmaking jokes about how good he is and i catched on with his friends then everyone was doing it

Thats kinda what I thought

Rockstar mentality
11-22-2007, 04:54 PM
lol but i bet u spelt it better in your mind then i spelt it in my post

Ms.Squeakers
11-22-2007, 05:11 PM
lol but i bet u spelt it better in your mind then i spelt it in my post

:lmao:

Nope,
I probably spelt it like..well worse then that

Like..you dont even wanna hear how I tried spelling that really long word from marry poppins this morning

EVEN THOUGH THE SONG WAS PLAYING ON THE TV FROM THE PARADE XD

Axel
11-22-2007, 05:15 PM
:lmao:

Nope,
I probably spelt it like..well worse then that

Like..you dont even wanna hear how I tried spelling that really long word from marry poppins this morning

EVEN THOUGH THE SONG WAS PLAYING ON THE TV FROM THE PARADE XD

I'm the only one in my group of friends that can spell Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, so don't feel bad.

Anyway:

"Chuck Norris was actually supposed to die three years ago, but Death can't work up the balls to tell him so."

"Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his amazing martial arts abilities, then promptly roundhouse kicked him in the face and took back his soul. They now play poker every second tuesday of the month."

"Chuck Norris can divide by zero."

"Chuck Norris split the Titanic in half because he can't stand Leonardo DiCaprio."

xo juicy splash
11-22-2007, 06:14 PM
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd80/FASHiON_BABEx0/ICONATOR_7e4743d760cf868b4ce8c864a9.gif
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd80/FASHiON_BABEx0/ICONATOR_4f72b43863e8b533bc32463edc.gif
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd80/FASHiON_BABEx0/ICONATOR_29a8cc8c5f12ac81bb1bfbb921.gif
Too bad Jeeves left & now it's just ask.com. :sad1:
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd80/FASHiON_BABEx0/ICONATOR_114057e51ba760166bf48a5dee.gif

CastawayJ
11-22-2007, 06:27 PM
Hey guys! Felt like being random today. So, tell your favorite Chuck Norris joke or jokes. Mine is:

"Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits."

lol

And just in case you aren't familiar, here's a website you can check out:

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

sounds like Edword and Alice, etc

cra_z_dude_17
11-23-2007, 10:15 PM
omg omg omg this is so hilarious a while back in the random thread i did about 100 chuck norris jokes here are my favs:
chuck norris has the best poker face in the world he won the 1983 world sereis of poker with a uno card a get out of jail free card and a 7 of clubs
chuck norris can make the sound of one hand clapping
i acnt think of anything else but i will

reminisce
11-24-2007, 11:27 AM
who is chuck norris, anyways?

disney100666
11-24-2007, 02:52 PM
who is chuck norris, anyways?

I have no idea.

STOPxmickeytime
11-24-2007, 03:25 PM
My all time favorite, that I quote all the time:
"Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a baby elephant into puberty."

K-Shong99
11-24-2007, 07:52 PM
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.