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View Full Version : Help Recent Brides! (long)


kicks1282
02-03-2007, 03:22 PM
Hi All,

So I am having an at-home wedding 3/31/07 with a disneymoon to follow. I suppose my questions are slightly OT, but any and all advice is MUCH appreciated!!

I tend to be a bit on the neurotic side with planning so no one was totally surprised when DF and I got engaged and planned to wed two years down the road. (DF proposed on a college trip 5/05) Fast forward two years and we are 8 weeks from The Day. :eek:

When I say I was a bit neurotic, I mean we picked our date 1.5 years out (this is where I am SO glad we are having an at-home because I would have driven myself crazy not knowing whether our date was guaranteed, etc.) and booked the church and reception hall then. We picked out our bridal party shortly thereafter and just started planning some of the bigger details. Both families looked at us as though we were a bit crazy planning some of the things we did that far in advance although neither is complaining now that we are this close that we have some things done pretty far out.

Here's where things get tricky. Because of the church's and reception hall's locations, we are saving some major $$. I wanted to kind of go "all out" with decorating because we saved so much on the sites and really wanted to go for an elegant event. I asked bridal party members for assistance and somewhat gave them "free reign" (with my final ok) with decorations, etc. Don't take this the wrong way - I still picked out the flowers and the main favors and I had the final say on the dresses they picked (which turned out great because they're perfect!) and let the rest of their appearance "go" - meaning their shoes and hair don't matter to me (although I did request hair up), and I'm open to discussion for just about anything. Now I'm getting phone calls and e-mails about things no one EVER talked to me about! (I let them know initially that I did not want to be involved in the planning of a shower and I think that the planning of everything else managed to get mixed in with the conversations I wasn't supposed to see) :confused3

I guess my main question is where did you all find a happy medium? I know some of you out there had very small bridal parties (something I'm somewhat wishing I did) - I have 5 bridesmaids. I'm trying to keep things "even-keeled" as much as possible and thus avoiding the term "BRIDEZILLA" as much as possible. (Sidebar - I hate that word and it has been a major factor in my planning, i.e. the free reign on appearances, etc.) Does anyone have any advice for me as for how to get a handle on things without coming off as a crazed bridal maniac? :scared:

Thank you in advance for any help you can give me at all - this board has been a blessing in the way of getting ideas and hearing about everyone's wonderful experiences. I only hope that my day will turn out half as great as all of yours!! :hug:

JJClemson
02-03-2007, 08:11 PM
Kendra, what exactly are they doing that has got you so upset? I know you said they are doing things that they never talked to you about. Perhaps they were confused b/c you acted nonchalantly about certain aspects of your wedding. Maybe they don't want to bother you with things they consider minor details? :confused3 If you do not like something they are doing, kindly explain you appreciate the offer/ idea, but you'd prefer it done another way. I do not think your girls would think of you as a bridezilla. This is YOUR wedding, and you should have things done the way YOU want. That's not being a bridezilla, just being a bride. I am sure they will understand b/c they most likely had things done their way for their weddings (or will if they are not married yet).

Try not to stress :hug: I know this can be a very stressful time! Good luck with everything, let us know how it goes!