Well, Merry Freaking Christmas to me

[Shugardrawers]

I'm finishing off the year with news of a relapse. I just don't know what to say beyond that yet. I'm still processing this. I'm tired. I'm just really tired.

[safetymom]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: I am so sorry to hear this. Please know you can come here to vent.

[Shugardrawers]

I try to be a realist about this but that doesn't stop me from getting my hopes up. Each time I relapse the diagnosis is more grim. Unless I can get into a clinical trial at Johns Hopkins for both laser surgery and medication my doctor feels 6 months is optimistic. Even if I can get into those trials, there's no guarantees.

[Wish I lived in Fl]

I am sorry for the bad news. Prayers said. I hope you are accepted to the Johns Hopkins study.

[safetymom]

Yes I hope you are accepted to the study. I will keep you in my prayers.

[JunieJay]

First and foremost, I am so sorry that you got this bad news. :(

Next, what will it take for you to get into the clinical trial at Johns Hopkins? Is there some sort of waiting list, how does it work?

From what I know of you here on the DIS boards, you've been a really amazing trooper. You're in my prayers. Keep us posted. :grouphug:

[Shugardrawers]

In my favor, I'm relativly young at 42 for having primary peritoneal cancer and otherwise extremely healthy. This makes me an ideal candidate for any kind of study they can come up with. In fact, some researchers have fought over me :rolleyes: If anyone qualifies, it's me. It'll be after the first of the year but I'll know more soon. Thank you all.

[JunieJay]

In my favor, I'm relativly young at 42 for having primary peritoneal cancer and otherwise extremely healthy. This makes me an ideal candidate for any kind of study they can come up with. In fact, some researchers have fought over me :rolleyes: If anyone qualifies, it's me. It'll be after the first of the year but I'll know more soon. Thank you all.

Well thats encouraging.

I live near Johns Hopkins, want me to go up there and give them the what for? :p I will, you just say the word. :p

Either way, I'll be following your posts and certainly keeping you in my prayers. :grouphug:

[Mackey Mouse]

OK.. I want to say bad words here but of course I cannot as they will not pass the filter and then being the mod here that would not be appropriate..

But Gosh darn it, I am so angry over this.....OK....Shugar, please know we are praying for you here.. I do not know what to say.. This disease is so bad, it tricks you into thinking you beat it, you are fine.....it gives you a few months of hope and feeling good and then it smacks you down again.

I know what a relapse means.. each time you do battle again with chemo hoping that this time it will kill all those cancer cells, knowing full well that each time you have a reoccurrence, your chances get slimmer and slimmer.. I understand, and feel your frustration. Just gear up and start working on those trials at Johns Hopkins.. try to get in.. what else can you do??

Hugs to you tonight.. I am not sure what else to say here except know that you are in my prayers. I am without words and pretty angry and questioning yet again.....Why??

[bytheblood]

:hug: Prayers being said! For comfort and the study!!

[Cherry]

I am so sorry you have to go through this. I don't know what else to say. You are in my prayers. From the posts of yours that I have read, I know you are an amazing person, and you will continue to fight your way through this. I hate this disease, it just wears you down. I am praying that you will get into that trial.

[Blueeyes101817]

:grouphug:

[minkydog]

NOOOoooooo :sad: Not fair! I am so sorry to hear this. You were doing so well. I hope JH can take you very soon. :grouphug: Here's a hug, it's all I've got, but you can have it.

[Jake & Crew]

I know how tired you feel, the night before Thanksgiving at a 5pm appt I was told that we were back "in the game". I felt wiped beyond belief. Sat in the parking lot and cried. Then put on my "strong side" for the kids.

Well here we are a few weeks later and this week the rollercoaster is up. I am doing a 5 day treatment, the CT scan is showing it localized and if the treatment does what it is supposed to we will be back on track.

What I am trying to say is scream, yell, cry, sleep for a day to work off the tired feeling then for your own well being be positive! I will pray for you, as I am sure many will. You will be in that program, I just know it!! :grouphug:


My positive thoughts and prayers I am sending out to you!!!!

[yecats]

:grouphug: Your in my prayers and wishes for you to get in the program and kick the s#&t out of the cancer.

[Mackey Mouse]

Hugs to Jake & Crew, I read through your post and thought I know how you feel but only as the caretaker.....I can only imagine how hard it is for the person going through it..

Recently I believe our new oncologist closer to home said this to us.....living with cancer, they are trying to find a way for people to live with it like any other disease, like heart, diabetes, find the right blend of meds (chemo in this case) that keeps the disease at bay and yet keep the person alive and living their lives without disabling them with too much chemo.....I thought it was an interesting take on the whole cancer treatment thing.. If they cannot put it in remission, just enough to let them live their lives..

Anyway.. hugs to all of you battling cancer...and to the caretakers too who are in the battle with their loved ones..

[mickeyfan2]

So sorry to hear your bad new. I am pulling for you to both get in to JH and to have a full and speedy recovery.

[arminnie]

Sorry to hear the news but wanted to give you a bit of encouragement. I have a dear friend who was diagnosed with advanced ovarian cancer when she was in her late 30s. She's had multiple surgeries and relapses, but is still here going strong at almost 50.

She truly is a walking miracle. Her phone message is "This is xxxx, I'm out saving the world." - and she is. She is the most giving person I've ever known.

The best to you - I know that you deserve it. You are a dear and kind person.

[luvwinnie]

Oh, no! Praying for you. Please let us know how you are doing.

[gemjoy]

:grouphug: Stay strong shugar! Prayer being sent your way!! :grouphug:
I'm so sorry about the news you've been given ~ It's not fair!

[Snowysmom]

I am so sorry to hear the bad news. But from posts I have read, you are very strong, motivated person. I hope you can get into the JH trials and beat the cancer. You will be in my prayers.

[NHAnn]

What I am trying to say is scream, yell, cry, sleep for a day to work off the tired feeling then for your own well being be positive! I will pray for you, as I am sure many will. You will be in that program, I just know it!! :grouphug:


My positive thoughts and prayers I am sending out to you!!!!

Aw Shugar...I'm sorry :hug:

I'm kinda liking Jake&Crew's advice...have a big vent, then you'll get into that program :thumbsup2 an become a success statistic!!

I'm sending you prayers and best wishes.

[NeedaVacation03]

:grouphug: to you. I am adding you to my prayer list. God Bless.

[escape]

Shugar and Jake and Crew -

Both of you are in my prayers! :grouphug: :wizard: :grouphug:

Here's hoping that you can get into JH and soon!

[goofy4tink]

Man, is it ever going to stop??!!! I'm so sorry you have such bad news. Way too many of you out there are battling this monster. You are all in my prayers...my prayer list is too long, I can't wait for the day when it ceases to exist!!! Know we are all here, vent away!!! It does help.

[Shugardrawers]

Thank you. Sorry I haven't checked in lately. There are some behind the scenes things happening I will tell you all about once I have all the details but for now, it's just nice to know others are thinking of me.

[CarolynU]

I'm thinking of you too. Sometimes things just suck.

[FergieTCat]

I just found this post.

I am SO sorry to hear this.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Jake & Crew]

Shugar

Back on the boards, thinking of you and want to see how you are.

Just did my treatment last week, working my way back to pain free and know it is right around the corner as is your next good news moment. Let us know what is happening when you are ready.....we will keep you in our thoughts and prayers!! You are not alone and you have many friends :cheer2: for every positive moment.

:hug:

Kate
( the k in Jake)

[Mackey Mouse]

I agree Kate, I would like to know how Shugar is doing myself.. I do hope she posts soon..

Hugs to you too, keep up the good work. My husband had his treatment yesterday, seems to be ok today. Last treatment he was not good at all, so cranky like a complete personality change, not him, and we figured it was the steroid they were giving him.. I think it is decadron or something like that. We eliminated it from this treatment and he seems so much better....

Keep up the good work...

Shugar, please let's hear from you.. hugs!!!

[goofy4tink]

Hope all is well with her also.
Marsha, I thought of you and Tommy as we drove through Mashpee yesterday, going home from Christmas with the inlaws. Hope Tommy is feeling better today.

[rie'smom]

I'm sorry to hear the news. You seem like a fighter and so get back in the ring and KO that bad boy!! Hugs and prayers are with you.

[Shugardrawers]

Sorry, I've been out of town for christmas. I don't have any "releasable" info at the moment but possible something HUGE coming. Since I'm extremely young and otherwise very healthy for my type of cancer I'm an ideal candidate for tests, trials and experimental treatments. I see a Dr. at John's Hopkins on the 2nd. I can tell you more then when I see himand make a decision. Thank you for your continued prayers.

[safetymom]

Sending prayers and pixie dust that you get into the program.

[Mackey Mouse]

Hugs Shugar.....you go girl and get in that darn trial at Hopkins.. It might knock that cancer on its ear.....I am routing for you all the way. Do let us know when you can and please take care of yourself.

[Christine]

Shugardrawers,

I just read this post last night and was so deflated to hear your news. While my cancer is what they call the "good" kind, I am all to familiar with all the feelings that go along with recurrences, treatment, etc.

I'm glad to hear that something BIG is coming from Johns Hopkins.

You have such a great outlook and spirit that I *know* you are going to do a great job getting through this. Please just know that we are out here thinking about you more than you probably know.

[goofy4tink]

Shugar...you have a lot going for you!! Sending along prayers that you get into that group and do a terrific job!! We're all here, right behind you!

[JunieJay]

Sorry, I've been out of town for christmas. I don't have any "releasable" info at the moment but possible something HUGE coming. Since I'm extremely young and otherwise very healthy for my type of cancer I'm an ideal candidate for tests, trials and experimental treatments. I see a Dr. at John's Hopkins on the 2nd. I can tell you more then when I see himand make a decision. Thank you for your continued prayers.

Wow. This sounds really promising. Look forward to hearing all about it, and of course keeping you in my prayers. :hug:

[kathleena]

Sorry, I've been out of town for christmas. I don't have any "releasable" info at the moment but possible something HUGE coming. Since I'm extremely young and otherwise very healthy for my type of cancer I'm an ideal candidate for tests, trials and experimental treatments. I see a Dr. at John's Hopkins on the 2nd. I can tell you more then when I see himand make a decision. Thank you for your continued prayers.

Sending prayers for your health and for a great visit with the doc that brings you all you need!

[Shugardrawers]

Tommorrow is the day. I meet with the new Dr. and will get all my questions answered and can make some real decisions. I'll check back in after that. Thanks guys for all your good wishes.

[Mackey Mouse]

You take care of yourself Shugar, all fingers are crossed for a good meeting and great discussion to handle what is going on...

Hugs.. do let us know!!!!!!

[4nana]

Know that many hearts and prayers are with you as you fight this brave battle Shugar :hug:. Sadly both of my parents have had cancer and dear Dad lost his brave battle after a 15 yr fight, so sadly I know what is possibly lurking down the line for me. I only hope I am as strong and full of courage as you and others here seem to be. I had never heard primary peritoneal cancer until 10 yrs ago when my friend was diagnosed. I am so gald you are getting into JH where we have some of the best drs in the world and we pray with your youth, strength and courage the drs will be able to find a miracle cure! Please never give up your faith! ^i^

Godspeed and I sincerely admire all those fighting this cancer curse. :hug:

[Jake & Crew]

Still thinking of you and praying for you ........here is a quick :hug:

[Shugardrawers]

I just realized I hadn't come back to update. Some interesting and exciting things are coming down the pike. I met with a Dr. from Johns Hopkins who has developed a laser that will slice a human hair lenghtwise 100x! One of the biggest obstacles for those of us with primary peritoneal cancer (a form of ovarian cancer that adheres to the abdominal wall) is that it spreads outwards like a puddle rather than in clusters like grapes. Cancer like that is often inoperable because it can't be debulked, or cut away, easily. And frequently, as in my case, it covers major arteries. You just can't cut away a major artery like that. Anyway, this new laser brings the hope of being able to peel away tumors layer by layer that were thought to be hopeless. Like mine. Then, traditional or experimental chemotherapy treatments would be much more likely to work for me because there is less cancerous tissue in the body.

So, on the 15th, I am one of the lucky first patients (there have been about 50 before me) to have this surgery. It's minimally invasive, in/out same day and little pain (or so he says). Following that I may go into a medication trial. I haven't decided on that yet and they haven't formally accepted me anyway. So that's where we stand. Thanks to everyone for thinking of me. I'm tired but not quite ready to quit yet.

[Christine]

Oh, that's so exciting and you are going to do GREAT!! We will all be pulling for you!

[Mackey Mouse]

I have been checking for updates and saw that you indeed did update..

That sounds incredible.. I am so excited for you that you will be one of the firsts to use this procedure, such history being made when you have this surgery....Hugs to you, keep the faith, sounds like you are right back on track, The battle is on and this time we want you to win...enough with this cancer.

Hugs, big hugs and lots of prayers coming your way.. Surgery is on the 15th so we probably should put a special post up on the day before to make sure we carry you through the surgery with flying colors....Woohoo, you go girl.

[kathleena]

So, on the 15th, I am one of the lucky first patients (there have been about 50 before me) to have this surgery. It's minimally invasive, in/out same day and little pain (or so he says). Following that I may go into a medication trial. I haven't decided on that yet and they haven't formally accepted me anyway. So that's where we stand. Thanks to everyone for thinking of me. I'm tired but not quite ready to quit yet.

This wonderful! Congratulations for being a part of this!

My dad had laser surgery done inside his bladder. He is 83 and had the "going" problem but the meds were no longer working for him. Not the same situation as you as he didn't have cancer - but I can tell you that he didn't require any pain meds after the surgery so trust the doc on that one! And he recovered very quickly from the whole thing.

Many prayers for you for the 15th!

[JunieJay]

Keeping you in my prayers for the 15th and beyond. Thanks for the update.

[Jake & Crew]

:grouphug: and :cheer2:


Here it is a New Year, New Hope and lots of positive energy and prayers sent your way the 15th and all days before and after!!!

So happy you updated us!!!

[N&B'smom]

I'm hoping for the best for you!!! I pray that the surgery is a full success and you will never have to worry of a relapse again. Thanks for updating us, keep them coming.

Shelby

[4nana]

So, on the 15th, I am one of the lucky first patients (there have been about 50 before me) to have this surgery. It's minimally invasive, in/out same day and little pain (or so he says). Following that I may go into a medication trial. I haven't decided on that yet and they haven't formally accepted me anyway. So that's where we stand. Thanks to everyone for thinking of me. I'm tired but not quite ready to quit yet.

:tinker:

I am so happy to hear this latest update - what exciting wonderful news!!! I have much respect for JH, their excellent reputation, drs and quality care. Good luck and hope you can feel our energy and prayers for a miracle. :hug:

[luvwinnie]

Sending prayers your way! The 15th is my wedding anniversary AND my parents anniversary...so GOOD THINGS happen that day! :goodvibes

[Pea-n-Me]

Tammy, this is my first time seeing this. I am praying hard that this treatment works for you, and works really well! :thumbsup2:

You're a fighter, sista - you hang in there! :grouphug:

Hugs to others (and their caretakers) not feeling well or going through other health issues.

[lovetoscrap]

Hugs and prayers for Tammy on her surgery today. I am thinking of you.

[SillyMe]

Hugs and prayers, Shug! :hug:

[catsrule]

My thoughts and prayers are with you all today. Keep the spirit.:grouphug:

[JunieJay]

Been thinking of you today! Hope to see an update when you feel up to it. :goodvibes

[Mysteria]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours Shug. :hug:

Myst

[Tinks]

I said a prayer for you today!:thumbsup2 Hope you recover quickly and easily!

[Tigger&Belle]

I know that Tammy is out of surgery and should be home any second. :hug: Shug we're here for you!

[L107ANGEL]

Always Shug!:hug: :grouphug:

[safetymom]

Saying my prayers and hoping for good news.

[Tigger&Belle]

Shug is back home and PUIing on MSN nicely. ;) She'll update as soon as she can. Just wanted to update so that everyone would know that she's back home. Shug, you have lots of people sending all kinds of love and good wishes to you. You are one totally awesome woman. :hug:

[SillyMe]

Thanks for the update T&B. Ask her if she got some good painkillers. :rotfl:

[Tigger&Belle]

Thanks for the update T&B. Ask her if she got some good painkillers. :rotfl:

My drug of choice....percocet. :dance3:

[L107ANGEL]

My drug of choice....percocet. :dance3:

and she didn't have to steal it :rolleyes1 ;)

[Tigger&Belle]

and she didn't have to steal it :rolleyes1 ;)

Hello, would you like to see the name on my bottle? :p

[SillyMe]

Hello, would you like to see the name on my bottle? :p
Yeah, right. You printed a fake label.

[Mackey Mouse]

Hugs Shug.. do hope you are feeling ok...please update when you can..

Thanks Ladies for the update, it is appreciated as a lot of us have been praying for her.

[trappednabox]

:grouphug: All the prayers in the world for ya!

[paigevz]

Shuggie Boogie...........glad you're home and hope you feel MUCH better today. I'm with you babe! :hug:

[Tigger&Belle]

Yeah, right. You printed a fake label.

:ssst:

[L107ANGEL]

:ssst:

:lmao:

[Miss Jasmine]

:hug: I am out of the loop. Stupid MSN. Of course maybe I did know, but I was PUI and don't remember. Either way, Shug, I love you and you are in my thoughts and prayers!

Oh and I order someone to make sure I am up to date on major events of PMSers. Thanks!

[redshoes]

Shug-
I missed all of this, please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[hiwaygal]

Shug...my thoughts and prayers are with you.

:hug:

[Jake & Crew]

:hug: and prayers.....

[bigmerle1966]

:hug:

[CEDmom]

Shug, how is it I didn't even know about this board :confused3 . I'm not even blonde ;) :rotfl: . Anyway, you already know I'm thinking about you and praying for you :hug: .

[LiteBrite]

Shug, I missed most of this too, but now that I know about it I know better how to pray for you.:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

[Caropooh]

Keeping you in my thoughts, Shug. You know we are all here for you. :grouphug:

[paigevz]

Boogie, just wanted to let you know I love you! :hug:

[FergieTCat]

Shug --

Just wanted to send some hugs and let you know you are missed!!

And, of course, a hug to Petey as well!