Would you take a job for less pay? [Archive] - The DIS Discussion Forums

View Full Version : Would you take a job for less pay?

vhoffman

10-13-2006, 06:07 AM

Dh has been job hunting for the last three months (extreme stress!) His current employer is downsizing and he's being laid off the end of this month.

Well, dh has 2 job offers! :Pinkbounc

Job1 is for 10k more a year. Job 2 is 10k less a year than his current salary. Both have comprable benefits.

Sounds like he should go for job1. However, job1 is in another state, Maryland. We currently live in Texas. Although Maryland sounds like a very nice place to live, it is expensive. The 10k increase in salary wouldn't cover the cost of living difference. Housing there is simply off the roof! I can't begin to find a decent house in a good area for under 400k, and that's just a house, nothing special. Our current house here in Texas is our "dream" home. Well, its a dream in progress, we're still putting some touches on it. But its just the right size for us, 5 bdr, 3 bath, one story (important because I have bad knees), good neighborhood, etc. We paid 175k for it--try to find such a deal now!

Job 1 would involve moving. Although the company will pay the relocation costs, I've been down that road before. Even with very generous relocation packages, we always end up spending around $5000 out of our own pocket for misc expenses, like eating out, hotels, etc., while in transition, buying clothes that fit the new climate, etc.

Meanwhile, job2 is right here in good ol' Texas. No moving. No giving up our dream home. No packing, moving vans, etc. However, its a cut in pay. Dh wants to go for job1. He feels its a better overall career move. I feel that careerwise they're both comprable. Actually, I feel it would be a net loss if we moved to Maryland due to the high cost of living. Dh feels that by accepting a decrease in salary it would forever impair his earnings, because, of course, subsequent raises are a percentage of your current salary. So be it! I really feel we would lose either way, but by staying here we would have a lower cost of living and we're already established. I've moved enough in my life, I want to put down roots somewhere and let them grow.

Well, just rambling here, but some opinions? Would you go for the higher paid job involving moving, higher cost of living, and, I didn't mention, a much more stressful job? Or suck up the salary reduction, stay put where our cost of living is lower and the job itself seems much less stressful? I'm not a "trophy wife" who has to have the best of everything. I'm much happier living within my means and being able to sleep at night rather than having the best of everything and owe out the wazoo!

Oh, another benefit, job 2 is for a university. In Texas, employees of any institution of higher learning get a substantial disocunt on college tuition for their family. With two kids going into college in the next 8 years that could be a gold mine right there. If we moved to Maryland there's simply no way we could put aside the amount of savings we'd need for a college education for both kids. Its just a major blow to dh's ego. Like most men, he defines himself by his job. A cut in pay is a cut in his self-image. Well, opinions, please!

SplshMtnLvr28

10-13-2006, 06:10 AM

KirstenB

10-13-2006, 07:30 AM

IMHO, $10k is not a ton of money all things considered. Please don't think I'm a snot who can just look the other way about money, quite the contrary.

What I mean is, moving is very stressful for the entire family. Sometimes you have NO choice. In that case, you suck it up and make the best of it. DH sometimes gets cold calls from headhunters about moving to take a job. One was in Maine, and the salary was $50k more than he was making. At the time, DH made 65k, so that was almost double his salary. We both voted no. His family is from Maine, and he hates the cold, plus he knows how much of your monthly budget goes toward heat bills.

We are fairly frugal. Our needs/wants are simple and taken care of. It sounds like you and we are similar in that regard. Maryland is not Maine. It doesn't get so cold there that you pay a fortune to heat your home. I'd guess that with Texas summers, and Maryland summers/winters, your electric bill wouldn't jump. DH also got an offer in Charlotte. We loved Charlotte, but it was for the same pay (and he was not in a layoff sitch), so again, we said no. We visited Charlotte and loved it, but we love our current home and community. If he had gotten a 50k raise to go to Charlotte, we might have chosen to go.

I know I'm being long-winded, but I have a true appreciation for the costs of moving, both financial and emotional. To me, 10k is not worth it. I'd argue he's basically taking a pay cut to move to Maryland.

P.S. I was always of the same mentality as your DH: your future salary is based on your current. This is only true in the same company. When my DH got laid off, he and his group were hired by a new firm. DH and his whole group got offers that were 25% more than their current salaries, because they'd been SO underpaid. They knew they were somewhat underpaid, but didn't realize how much.

This is a tough decision. Your DH is the breadwinner, so his feelings are a big part of the decision. At a minimum, you both need to visit Maryland and see what you think if you haven't already. Best of luck!! I think most of us have been through at least one layoff, and it's stressful, I know.

OctDisney

10-13-2006, 07:37 AM

You have to look at the long term implications.

I once took a pay cut with a position that gave me the opportunity not to travel. Did it set us back financially, you bet, but the rewards were as follows:

I got to coach my sons for 5 years and when I look back at my life, a little less money and more time with the boys instead of airports, Priceless.

vhoffman

10-13-2006, 07:57 AM

Actually, I was off in my figures--job2 is only 8k less a year than he's making now. Ok, I don't mean to sound glib about such sums, it would be hard to slice 8k out of our budget, but all things considered it might be worth it. And you really have to look at the bottom line, not gross pay. Paycheck deductions such as medical insurance premiums, etc., all need to be considered. His actual take home pay might not be a whole lot less. We've been facing the possibility of a layoff for 3 months now and I've been cutting back in preparation. It's amazing how much money was going out the door. Simple changes resulted in big savings.Changes that really didn't even affect our lifestyle!

DH is getting older (he's 53). I'd like to see him spend the remainder of his working life in a less stressful position. He's vested in his pension plan and we have quite a large sum stashed aside for retirement, so I think our future will be secure without him working himself to death for a few extra bucks. Also, I'm from Ohio, and I really don't relish the idea of moving back to snow and ice. Just think of the money we'd spend just buying winter gear!

LaraK

10-13-2006, 09:03 AM

As you know, I am living in Maryland. I would say that a 10K increase would be a 20-30K decrease in money in your pocket for your family. It is VERY expensive here. It's not just the house. To buy a 5 bedroom 3 bath single story around here may be a minimum of 400K, but that's in a neighborhood where you couldn't use the local schools, so add another 10K per child per year to the equation to put them in private religious schools (20K a year for a straight prep school). If you want a 5 bedroom in an area with good schools, count on at least another 100K in your housing cost.

The other aspect to consider is the lifestyle. My DH has been to Texas and talks about how much he loved the people because they were so nice. Here? Forget about it! We are east coast rude. (I lived in Pittsburgh for 10 years and when I came back I really noticed how big of a difference it is). Once you get into a good neighborhood, the people will be friendly, but drive on either the DC or Baltimore beltways, or I95 connecting them and you'd better be prepared for a hostile, aggressive experience.

Anyway, I love where I live, but wanted to be sure you really tested out the waters first.

nuttylawprofessor

10-13-2006, 09:06 AM

Something you didn't mention that strikes me is the stress that moving would put on your kids. It sounds like they're established in their school routines. I can't help but think of the culture shock they would go through in moving from Texas to Maryland.

Working for a university is wonderful. The benefits just can't be beat. I took a substantial cut in pay to :teacher: rather than practice, and I haven't looked back.

Stay put.

minkydog

10-13-2006, 09:28 AM

prestonsmomma

10-13-2006, 09:54 AM

My DH just took a job paying about 1/2 of what he was making. It isn't as hard as it seems. We simply paid off my van (didn't owe too much and the payments were HIGH) and are actually doing better right now financially than we were (we are also much more careful with our spending though). He traveled 4 nights a week and now he is home every night. It's been the best move we have made in a LONG time too. He is happy and loves his new job.

PlutoPony

10-13-2006, 10:36 AM

You don't talk much about the nature of the 2 jobs... which would be a better career move irrespective of money? That would be the deciding factor for us at that age. Which job is a better fit for what your DH wants to do, would one give him new skills (a real plus at his age), is one company better managed with good future potential, how state of the art is the equipment at the two places, etc. IMHO in this salary range, a < 10% salary difference isn't a huge issue. What about future earnings potential?? Would the university job make him a state employee? If so, you can pretty much be assured of minimal salary increases in the future (get your money up front) but probably OK bene's. Private sector would have much better upside potential in the salary area.

vhoffman

10-13-2006, 10:37 AM

I think we're going to forget about Maryland! The pay seems sooooo impressive. I think it really stroked dh's ego just to think he could command that much. But he needed a reality check. It really wouldn't go that far in Maryland. I used to work for a university as a librarian and loved it. The whole atmosphere is just different than coperate America. Plus, you can't ignore the tuition benefits. We're staying here in the great state of Texas!

solgent

10-13-2006, 11:12 AM

Six years ago I took a $15K pay cut to live where it's cheaper and a part of the country we like better. No regrets. Except that now we are farther from Disney World!

llp479

10-13-2006, 02:55 PM

What about tax implications? The state of Maryland has a 2 - 4.75% state income tax while Texas has none. Also, what about property taxes? I know for us, that also came into play when contemplating relocating for a job.

If you take into account the discount on tuition, does this then actually become the same as his current salary, or even an increase? Sometimes you need to look at the benefit package as part of total compensation to see what the true salary is.

princesspwrhr

10-13-2006, 02:57 PM

Have you been to homefair.com? They have a great cost of living calculator there.

We move a LOT - more often than I care to admit and with 3 kids it's a bit tiresome. You didn't mention kids but since you posted on the family board, I'm going to assume there are kids. And given the age of your husband I'm going to hazard a guess that the kids are at least jr high, possibly HS age. That's a hard age to have to move them, especially if they are already started in HS - transferring credits for graduation is not always easy.

The state we live in now has a much higher cost of living than the one we most recently moved from. It's comparable to your Texas v. Maryland in housing prices. We moved here from a university job that paid 'decent' for the area to a contracting job that paid excellent, but it was just enough to afford to live here. The contract ended and was not picked back up as was promised so we had to scramble for a job. The job we ended up with pays half of what the contracting job paid and we have no hope of purchasing a house here. It's miserable. After moving and renting for so long I was beyond ready to purchase a house, paint the walls and have a home.

All things considered, university jobs aren't that bad. The pay raises are small, but they're there. The stress level (even in the IT dept) generally isn't high constantly. We noticed that certain times of the year were more stressful than others. Generally it was the start of new term and summers were an absolute breeze!

Like you said - there's more to a new job than just the dollar figures. And when you factor in moving there's lots more to consider.

I'd take the lower paying job where you are.

clb22

10-13-2006, 03:09 PM

The 10k more in Maryland is not really 10K. Your montly mortgage for a nice house will be really high and there goes the $10K.....

I live in Maryland it is very expensive to live here.

I have also had to face a layoff (actually 3 of them) and yes, I also made less money when I found a new job. But I did not move and eventually I found other jobs making more.

Stay where you are - you will not regret it and your family will be happier for it!!

Good luck!

vhoffman

10-13-2006, 04:35 PM

We have two kids, both in elementary school, 9 & 10. However, time has a way of passing and college will be upon us before you know it. Tuition benefits are a major benefit for us.

Moving would be hard for the kids. It would be hard for everyone. I finally found a hairdresser I like :rotfl2:

My main concern, after the cost of living difference, is being stuck up there. We couldn't keep our Texas home, even rented, and qualify for any type of mortgage up there. So we'd burn our bridges. Then, well, there's no guarantee that job won't lay dh off in a few years. Then we're stuck up there with a $3000 month mortgage and very little job prospects (the older dh gets, the less desirable he is in the job market :guilty: ). The university job is better suited for everyone. Universities do lay off, but not to the same tune as corporations (they aren't tied to quarterly earnings). I want dh to take job2. We stay here, keep our nice house, have better job security, and the job itself is less stressful. Now I just need to convince dh to take job2!

lee

10-13-2006, 09:47 PM

I haven't responded to too many posts, but this one I can't pass up. I live in Maryland and commute to DC for work. I pay $230 a month to park in my office garage; there is also the cost of gas to get to that garage. Our average gasoline bill is $400-$500 a month for my husband and I to commute. It took me two hours to get into work today because of the traffic - a little longer than usual, but it happens more and more frequently. $10,000 will get eaten up quickly. I'm not certain, but the cost of living and everyday expenses are probably more here than in Texa. Life is so short as it is. The idea of putting down roots as you said in an area you are familiar with and comfortable in, plus the University benefits seems to speak for itself. Also consider what you will do if your husband doesn't like the new Maryland job or if something happens to it. Then what will you do? I'd be happy to talk to you more about Maryland.

disneydancer1969

10-13-2006, 09:53 PM

hard choice. i live in va so you'd be close to me but i will say texas is nice. maryland is expensive! i say try job 1 and if you can not handle the moving, housing, etc. you can move back. when you sell your house put it up for rent so if you don't like it you can move back into it.
:thumbsup2

disneydancer1969

10-13-2006, 09:54 PM

on second thought do job 2. stay in your comfort zone.

shelly3girls

10-13-2006, 09:57 PM

I would go for job #2. DH was offered a position making 20k more than he does now but it would have required a long commute and a significant change in lifestyle for us. We knew it just wasn't worth it. It sounds like you are better off staying where you are. Also, just b/c he takes this job doesn't mean he is tied in forever. He could keep his eye out for the perfect job in the future.

vhoffman

10-13-2006, 10:43 PM

One problem I didn't mention with job 2(staying in Texas work for a university) is that the job won't start until next January. DH is really uneasy about being unemployed for 2 months. He's getting a severance package that is about 4 months pay, we can live a lot longer than 4 months on 4 months pay! Plus, we do have savings (we really did take the advice to have 6 months living expenses in the bank!), and our debts are low, including our house payment. I said he should relax and consider it a 2 month vacation. He needs a break from work! We won't wind up on the streets.

I think its just a man thing to have a paycheck coming in. He's never gone more than 2 weeks since he was 18 without earning a paycheck. Well, in my opinion, he's earned a little break. Job 1 will be there for him next year, when he's rested and raring to go!

NotUrsula

10-13-2006, 10:54 PM

Ask the HR depts of both jobs to make up a statement of total compensation, which is a list of the dollar value of both the salary AND the employer-paid benefits. Your DH may well find that when the academic benefits are given a dollar value, job B may end up paying just as well as job A. If he takes B and later moves on, he can use that total compensation figure as his basis. Benefits have a fair market value; they count as part of your compensation.

That said, when it comes down to it, he will be the one doing the job day in and day out, and if he isn't comfortable in the working atmosphere, then he should not take the job (especially as it seems that he is not having any problems with marketability.)

BTW, I worked for over a decade for an IT contractor that served academic institutions. As this is a travel board, you should be aware that it is fairly likely that as an academic IT employee, he might not be able to vacation during intersessions and/or academic breaks -- the times when your children are normally out of school any time other than midsummer. Those periods are typically when academic institutions do their major systems maintenance work, such as upgrades, etc. You might also find that he might sometimes have to work on major holidays such as Thanksgiving, Christmas and the 4th of July, because, again, those typically are the only times when a research university can take the network fully off line for more than a few hours.

PS: If he takes the job that doesn't start until next semester, he won't be "unemployed" for 2 months. You are not unemployed if you have a position with a definite starting date. Do be aware, though, that most academic institutions pay monthly rather than biweekly, and there may be no paycheck until he has been there at least 6 weeks, and possibly 8. (That is always what I have experienced with academic jobs; where I worked the payroll had to be submitted a full period before the actual pay date, so there is usually a delay before the first paycheck is cut. Sometimes the university will have a no-interest short-term loan program to cover that delay period if you really need money before your first scheduled pay date.)

ilovejack02

10-13-2006, 11:13 PM

I'd take job 2. I think what the 10k takes away, the benefits for college makes it up.

My dad is going through a similar situation... Although he refuses to take a job that paid even slightly less then his old job. :furious: :furious: :furious:

Thank goodness, my DH was ok taking a job for less. He took a 45% pay cut when he started his job. He was told if he didnt like the pay he could go elsewhere and they were right, people were in line for the job. We knew in the long run it would be the best for us. We sweated it out for a cpl of years and made it through. He has been with his company for 5 yrs and now making 25,000 more a yr and MUCH better benefits.

Redbudlover

10-13-2006, 11:21 PM

Well, I am going to play devil's advocate here because all the other dissers say you should stay... I am a recruiter and help people make these decisions all the time. First of all your husband is totally right when he says job 2 will deeply affect his future earnings - and not just because he would be taking a deep cut but also because other possible future employers will see that cut as a red flag - what was wrong with him that he had to take a pay cut they will wonder - and they will wonder - I hear it all the time...

I know you really really want to stay in Texas, but you want to so badly that it seems you are slanting your thinking to give yourself the strongest argument possible to stay. Which I totally understand! But for the sake of just for a second looking at it differently look at this as well. You are not actually going to just gain $10K by going to Maryland - you are going to gain $18K - because the job in TX is $8K less than what you have now - not less than what you would be making there.... Eighteen thousand dollars difference between the two jobs - that is a lot! So if the job in Maryland leads to something better it would be on top on $18K so could easily be in the range of $25K. Also if he takes the better job in terms of his career he will most likely be able to change to a university job sometime in the future if he wants one. Could he go the other way? Perhaps not.

And Maryland is a lot warmer than Ohio, girl! I say it is important to make your decision without blinders or bias. I know you don't want to leave, but before you get all upset you might look at the neat things MD has to offer. I have all kinds of candidates who would dearly love to move to Maryland. They tell me that every week! There are lots of people who stay put all their lives and they are very happy. And there are lots of people who work hard to build their careers and they often have to move. Both ways have a lot of good to them. I am sorry you are in this position. It is tough I know. Good luck to you!

runner26.2

10-13-2006, 11:31 PM

7 years ago I worked 6 days a week, 60-70 hours per week, high stress, never took more than 1 week off at a time and took 2 maybe 3 weeks a year off as holidays. I woke up one morning and decided that this was not how I wanted to spend the rest of my professional career. DW was very understanding and I left one position for another which meant a $40,000 cut in salary ...

7 years later I can say it was the best thing I ever did. I don't work quite as much, the stress level is substantially reduced and I get to spend time with DW and our three children.

Money isn't everything. Do what is best for your family. Not what is best financially for your family but what is BEST for your family. If everyone will be happier in Maryland move there and deal with the financial consequences, if on the other hand everyone will be happier in Texas with a few less $$$ then do that. Just don't let a higher salary in isolation drive your decision.

Life is too short to be driven entirely by money.

NotUrsula

10-13-2006, 11:41 PM

... what was wrong with him that he had to take a pay cut they will wonder - and they will wonder - I hear it all the time...

Your point is well-taken in regard to the business world, but I'm guessing that you don't often deal with academic institutions or government agencies. In the academic world, it is not standard to give a prospective employer a pay history -- in fact, it would be very unusual for anyone to do so. In 24 years, I have never revealed my previous compensation to a prospective employer, and quite frankly, if one asked me, I wouldn't do it. They offer what they are authorized to pay (the pay grade is normally based on credentials and years of experience), and you can either take it or leave it; usually there isn't a whole lot of wiggle room in salary terms at a state school. If he stays in the academy but decides to change jobs to work at another school, his previous pay won't matter at all.

Nanu57v

10-14-2006, 07:34 AM

Can you fish for more money at Job 2? DH just got offered a job and after considering it, we decided it would not be best for our family to take a financial loss of the 5K less(no pressing layoffs here). He told exactly that to the job and they came back and offered him 5k more. Now we don't know what to do since everything is exactly equal now.

JJ&JSMOM

10-14-2006, 07:41 AM

I'd stay where you are. As others have posted $10,000 is not enough money to pack up the family & belongings, sell your dream house and move a thousand miles away. No one knows what the future holds - he may find another job down the road in Texas that has the $ you want. I'd stay put! Good luck!

laceemouse

10-14-2006, 09:34 AM

We have lived all over and I kinda enjoy moving but I have to say STAY IN TEXAS!!! It is cheaper than just about anyplace else in the country!

vhoffman

10-14-2006, 11:50 AM

Hey, Redbudlover :wave2:

Interesting that you're a recuriter in Texas. You say you have candidates who would love to move to Maryland. Are they from Texas? What are some of the reasons they find Maryland attractive, both job and lifestyle considerations?

Do employers typically offer increases in salary to compensate for the higher cost of living up there? If we were to maintain our current salary up there we'd essentially be taking a cut with the cost of living factored in. What type of employers do you work with--technical? Your input sounds interesting, thanks!

PlutoPony

10-14-2006, 12:21 PM

I'm not a recruiter (nor do I play one on TV ;) ) but one big plus to this area is the sheer number of opportunities available at any given time for many professionals - especially IT. The jobs market here is VERY strong with no signs of abating, as so much is tied to government and consulting. And between DC and Baltimore you essentially have access to two metropolitan markets, both of which are likely larger than the area you are currently in. Plus most of these jobs are using state of the art technology which gives people a lot of opportunity to keep up skill sets (very important to older workers IMHO).
On the family side, living in this area puts you in close proximity to so many wonderful family adventures without having to hop on a plane (something you truthfully can't say about your current location). From the Mall, museums, and memorials in DC, to the Aquarium and waterfront in Baltimore to Mt. Vernon, Harper's Ferry, Gettysburg, Monticello, Antietam, geez the list is ENDLESS. Philly's a couple hours north, and you're less than 8 hours to Boston. We feel very fortunate to live here for our son's sake if nothing else, and after 8 years still haven't run out of day trips! The cost of housing and traffic are definitely downsides, but if you can adjust to that AND the job is a good fit this area certainly has a lot to offer a family such as yours.
Good luck deciding!

vhoffman

10-14-2006, 01:43 PM

nice to know there's so much to do in the Maryland area. We sometimes feel we're straining to find new, interesting things to do around here. There's only so many times you can visit the Alamo (Yes, we will remember the Alamo!). Also, the weather here is really not the greatest. I just came in from grocery shopping and I'm so sweaty I have to change clothes. Its soooo hot here in central Texas, about 3/4 the year. There's days when you do need coats, etc., but usually it starts off cool in the morning, then it gets warmer in the afternoon and you're miserable in your warmer clothes. I don't actually miss winter and all the hassles of snow and ice, but I would like to go somewhere I'm not constantly sweating. The humidity here is quite high, and even in October it reaches around 80-90 degrees.

Well, the whole decision revolves around what's best for our family in all regards, not just financial. A lot to think about! We definitely need to negoiate a higher salary if dh goes to Maryland, at least enough to break even with our lifestyle here.

luvsmickeymouse

10-14-2006, 03:55 PM

I would take offer #2 and stay in Texas.

PlutoPony

10-14-2006, 05:15 PM

Has your husband been to Columbia yet to interview? If not, when they do make arrangements for that ask for him to spend a day or so with a realtor looking at houses in the area - that will give you an idea of what the market is like. Companies looking at a potential relo will often hook you up with someone before the visit so you can give them an idea of what you're looking for and how much you want to spend. If job 1 looks like a position you want to seriously consider, you might want to consider making a trip up yourself on your nickel to get a feel for it, before you have a make a decision. Hopefully you won't have a decide without at least one of you getting a first hand look at things...