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bethyg
06-21-2006, 04:45 PM
DH has a "managers and their wives" retreat coming up next month for 4 days. He cannot go alone. We have 2 children (DS 13 and 4). Both our parents are too elderly to watch them, and other family/friends have plans for the time we would be gone. We cannot take the kids. It would be best "company wise" for us to attend this function.

I am looking into hiring a nanny to stay with them for 4 days. There are 2 "childcare nanny" agencies in my area. Both require the basic: criminal background check, over 18, cpr and first aid, drug test. I have spoken at length to one agency (owned privately by a couple.....ran out of their home). They explained they come out to assess our home, meet us, etc...... then assign someone "compatible". They have about 25 nannies on staff, staffing child and elder respite care.

I have never hired a nanny before, and our sitters (for our once YEARLY) night out, are people we know. I have contacted my local BBB and there are no reports filed.

HELP! What questions do I need to ask? Where else can I search to make sure my boys will be safe with this agency?

Thanks!

Tinkerbell_Tiffany
06-21-2006, 04:53 PM
I wish I could help, but I have family to sit with my kids.
I have seen so many bad things happen on the news, I just look at it this way, and again this is my own opinion about this, "I would not leave my car with a stranger, so I would never leave my children with one regardless of references" and I must admit I am way too over protective of my kids so I guess that's just me.
mabe if you had someone come over everyday and check on them?
good luck! :)

SleepyatDVC
06-21-2006, 05:16 PM
bettyg,

I don't know if I would be comfortable leaving the kids alone with a stranger especially overnight.

Are there any friends or family that they can stay with? Many times they might be too busy to physically watch your kids but maybe if they came over WITH the nanny?

Ideally, the kids could stay with the grandparents and the nanny can take care of the kids at the grandparents. That way at least they are not alone with only the stranger.

However, if my choices were limited, at the very LEAST, I would have the nanny agency send the nanny over ASAP for a few nights and days so you can figure out how comfortable you and the kids are with that person. I wouldn't wait until a few days before your trip because by then it might be too late to either cancel your trip or request someone else.

If possible, it would be best if someone you know at least stays over even if they actually don't babysit. Make sure your 13 year old knows the rules and has a number where he can reach you 24 hours a day.

Good luck with your decision.

sk!mom
06-21-2006, 06:02 PM
I would not leave them with a stranger under any circumstances. I like the idea of hiring the nanny to stay with the children and the grandparents or some other friend or family member.

DH and I are going away for four days next month and DD10 is attending dance day camp and then grandparents will have her in the evenings only. By that time of day she will be tired out and will feel quite happy to have a nice dinner and then watch a movie with grandma. Some type of camp might be a solution for your older child. Four year olds are tricky.

If there is absolutely no way to have someone that you know there then I would stay home and DH and would go and his employer would just have to understand. Good Luck

ntink
06-21-2006, 06:05 PM
Does DS4 go to preschool? If so is there an option of hiring one of his teachers. At my DD's preschool, many of the teachers babysit on the side. Best of luck, this is a tough situation.

cgcw
06-21-2006, 06:13 PM
Hi,

I have never hired a nanny but I have been involved in hiring and firing care givers for my handicapped Mom. I've dealt with agencies that have been good and some that have been awful.

One of the concerns I would have is whether or not your going to be able to meet the person first. Most of the caregivers sent by the agency to care for my Mom were sight unseen. None of them spoke fluent English -- which has been a challenge in it's own way. Some of them were put out by the job they were hired to do. Some of them made long distance phone calls to their home countries and left before the bills came in. Some of them were downright mean and nasty. One of them I had to have physically removed from my Mom's home with the help of two police officers who stayed at my Mom's residence while she packed her bags.

Yes, there have been some good ones over the years but I have to tell you, honestly, the majority have not been.

We are now past all that with my Mom but based on what I saw, there is no way that I could leave my own children with someone I didn't know extremely well.

Is there anyway you can bring the kids and a caregiver with you to the retreat? Then you could keep an eye on them during breaks and at night. The caregiver could keep them entertained during the day with attractions in the area or swimming in the pool or playing games. But, you would still be there to oversee exactly what is going on.

Best of luck.

princessjv
06-21-2006, 06:52 PM
I was a nanny. There are many, many great nannies out there! The few times you hear about a bad nanny experience, is far less than you hear about parent who abuses/neglects their children! That being said, as a former nanny, I am one of the hardest parents to please, when it comes to the care for my children.

My suggestion is to start interviewing a few quailified nannies, pick one or two and have them over for the evening/day (seperately) while you do a few things around the house. Then ask them to watch your kids while you go out. Tell them you will be back at x time, however come home earlier. This way you can get a great picture of what is going on. Also, given that one of your children is a teen, they will be a great asset and judge of the care for the little one. After a few times watching your kids, you should start feeling comfortable with the nanny, as well as the nanny should feel comfortable with you kids and their schedules. Then pick the one that is a better fit with your family.

Good Luck!

daisyduck123
06-21-2006, 07:36 PM
There is no way I would go on the trip. If DH couldn't go alone, then we'd all be staying home. Surely his company can't fault your DH for you both not being able to attend.

~Kathie
06-21-2006, 07:55 PM
When my kids were younger, we used to switch off with our neighbors who had kids the same age. We'd take their kids for a weekend and another time they would take ours.


Does your older son have a friend that you really know the parents well??
That might be another option.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

summerrluvv
06-21-2006, 08:24 PM
4 days is a long time for 2 children to be with a stranger. They may do criminal background checks on them, but remember, all criminals don't get caught. You can't get the local sitter to watch them? I personally wouldn't feel comfortable with that situation at all and I wouldn't go on the trip.

pearlieq
06-21-2006, 08:46 PM
You've got plenty of time to establish a relationship, which is nice.

I would recommend developing relationships with 2-3 nannies now, so that by the time you go, everyone is comfortable and knows the ropes. The 13 year old is old enough to advocate for himself and old enough to let you know what he feels comfortable with.

You might not get a lot of support here on this question--a lot of people can't imagine leaving their kids. That's fine if that's what works for their family, but it's not the only way it has to work. It's not like you're hiring someone on Friday and leaving on Saturday. You have 4 months to find someone you trust.

I do like the idea of combining the nanny with your family or friends--the nanny can help out where your friends might not be able, and you'll have an extra layer of comfort while you're away.

Wish I lived in Fl
06-21-2006, 08:47 PM
Because the kids are 13 and 4 i wouldn't be as worried. 13 year old old enough to tell you if anything wrong so Nanny would know anything they do will be reported to MOm and Dad. But the best would be the Nanny to provide care and Grandma for secure feeling at night. Maybe at your house?

zumbergc
06-21-2006, 09:37 PM
What about lining up a few friends, or a few family members to watch the kids. Have each family or friend take a day.

Many of your friends or family may be overwhelmed by a 4 day commitment.
But, possible a day or 1.5 days would fit better into their schedules.

It would be a lot of moving around., but family and friends are better than strangers. Plus, if you planned it right, they could look forward to staying at different friends/families houses.

hollyb
06-21-2006, 09:47 PM
Sorry no way would we leave the kids with a stranger for that long. No matter how many back ground checks they do, things slip through. I would tell DH to ago and go without you. JMHO or take them with you.

shoegirl1020
06-21-2006, 10:18 PM
Is it possible that the children can attend with you? If thats the case you could check with the hotel about childcare while you attend any special dinners, etc. Or maybe leave the 13 yr with the 4 yr old while you are at any event.

If not I would be ok with the nanny if you feel comfortable with the couple running the business. Their attitude is a good indication of their employees. If you do go with a nanny I would also have them come over. I've babysat more children than I can count, even was a nanny to twin infants. I was also willing to go to a families house (I wouldn't accept payment) to let the kids meet me and to meet the parents.

Good luck. Let us know what you choose

Hannathy
06-21-2006, 11:07 PM
It is easy for others to say I wouldn't go or I would never leave my kids but sometimes you just have to. If you don't have family you don't. I didn't and that is why these places are in business.It is only 4 days not all summer and you have an older child who knows enough I would hope to leave the house and go to a neighbor if there was a real problem and the 4 yr old is not an infant. I would check out the agencies and interview or meet the nanny you would use. I might have her stay for 1 night before you leave and hear what your kids think of her. The Nanny businesses don't want to hire someone who is trouble they don't need the bad publicity so do a pretty good job of interviewing.Just stick with an established, insured, bonded whatever place. My neighbor came over from Sweden as a nanny and met her husband and stayed here. Just because it is overnight it really isn't that different than the folks who pick a daycare and then drop an iinfant off for 10 hrs everyday. Your kids can talk and take care of themselves if neede. Do your research and make the best choice you can and then don't let others beat you up over it.

Debbie
06-22-2006, 06:52 AM
Do your research and make the best choice you can and then don't let others beat you up over it.::yes:: I have been the nanny (heck I think they called me a "babysitter") for a family that was going away for the weekend. It was a way for me to live at the time, and, in those days, it wasn't a lot of $$ either.
You've already checked out the agencies with the BBB, so if there were problems they would likely have surfaced. Asking for and calling other clients for references would ease your mind as well. Establishing a relationship with a few and then choosing from there is the way that I would go.
Since hiring a nanny is possible for you, enjoy your trip! Being a couple is important, and it sounds like this trip is important for your DH's career.

formernyer
06-22-2006, 09:22 AM
I would never leave my kids with a hired stranger. Assuming the events are all held at the hotel, I'd just bring the kids along and allow the 13-year old to babysit. You and your DH could take turns running up to the room every 30-60 minutes to check on the kids. I'd be much more comfortable with that than leaving them with a stranger.

DawnM
06-22-2006, 09:25 AM
I wouldn't go. Period.

We have so very rarely had even babysitters. We just have some personal issues with leaving our kids.

I don't understand how any company could make the WIFE of the employee leave your children if you have noone to leave them with.

That is just my .02. I wouldn't do it.

Dawn

Chicago526
06-22-2006, 09:42 AM
Here's a view from the other side.

My parents went to Hawaii twice when I was growing up, both times for over two weeks. Both time my grandparents stayed with us for one week, and a hired nanny stayed the other week (two full weeks were too much for my grandparents to be away from their home).

My brothers and I were fine! Both nannies were older ladies and they cared for us very well. Nothing "weird" happened, nothing dangerous happened. We weren't even upset with our parents for leaving us. They called several times while they were away to check up, and we had the numbers to the hotels they'd be at up on the fridge in case we did need them for some reason.

As long as you carefully pick the agency you use and interview the nanny well, I see no reason not to hire one.

crisi
06-22-2006, 09:56 AM
I'm more agast at the sexism in a "husband wife business trip that is good for his career." Wow! 1962, anyone? What if you had your own career and couldn't take the time off?

Another option would be to bring the kids and nanny with you on the trip. Put the kids in their own room. With this sort of arrangement, you may be able to hire an older teen or young adult (though with a 13 year old son, maybe hiring a grandmotherly type is more appropriate anyway).

I agree with the people who are less worried with a 13 year old at home. With him around, what you really need is someone to care for your four year old and make sure your older son doesn't get into trouble. But your 13 year old is old enough to know if something is wrong and if you make sure to leave instructions to contact a responsible adult, they'll be fine.

Mickey'snewestfan
06-22-2006, 10:44 AM
I used to nanny and stayed with the kids when the parents went away, but that was a while ago, and they were kids I knew very well.

A few thoughts I have:

1) Can you put the kids in day camp for those days, and maybe the week before? I think the structure of going someplace familiar during the day, might help break up the days. Also, I can see DS 13 ending up taking a lot of responsibility during this time (the little one might not want a relative stranger tucking him, etc . . . ) and this would give them a break. If that doesn't work (e.g. if you're going on the weekend) I'd try and set up playdates etc . . .

2) Get DS13 a cheap prepaid cell phone and teach him to carry it and call you if there's a problem -- good preparation for teenagerhood anyway, plus then you can call him anytime you want to check in.

3) I'd ask around for someone with a personal reccomendation --do any friends of yours have nannies or home daycare providers they love? Any teachers at either kids' school?

4) I like the idea of having your parents or in-laws come, even if they need help with the actual childcare. If you had adults there you could probably hire a neighborhood teen to stay there and help which would cost less, thus allowing you to afford the tickets.

5) If you do go with agency, I'd check references on the nannies yourself. Beyond that I'd go with your gut, and also your children's reactions to someone. Honestly, I think the chances of someone hurting your child are slight. I think the chances are much higher that your 4 year old will become upset or not "bond" with the nanny. So having the person over and watching them interact with your 4 year old first might be really important.

6) I'd also give your DH's company some feedback about how innappropriate this expectation is. Even though it may work out with you -- sounds like you have old enough kids to tolerate it and can afford the nanny, it's still an unfair thing to ask of you. The next family to come along might be in a different situation.

Good luck!

DVC Sadie
06-22-2006, 11:35 AM
There is no way I would go on the trip. If DH couldn't go alone, then we'd all be staying home. Surely his company can't fault your DH for you both not being able to attend.

Companies can/do fault employees for not attending their functions. The people who don't attend may find themselves not getting the promotion or not getting the same % raise/bonus. I am not saying its right but I am saying it happens all the time.

OP, could you book a connecting room for your chldren and bring the nanny as well? My SIL use to have to bring a nanny for her kids and just had adjoining rooms so both of them could check on the kids.

bethyg
06-22-2006, 11:51 AM
Thanks for all the replies. The company function isn't "mandatory circa 1962", but a managers retreat/vacation reward to say thank-you for a great year and all the hard work you do. Bringing the spouses is a bonus, because they realize we suffer when our loved ones are out of town most of the week, every week, and put in weekends as well. His company is a great company! :) All expenses are paid.

Most of the other managers have family that live nearby, or their kids are grown. Both of our parents live out of state, the closest is 600 miles. We never go out, so we have no routine sitters. I am a SAHM, so we have no daycare providers to ask.

My husband is a newly promoted manager, and trying to establish a relationship with his fellow managers. Since each manager lives in a different state, they only meet at business functions, and therefore don't get to know each other very well. He's the "new kid on the block" in a group of managers who have been together for years. I understand his desire to go, and I also understand why he can't go alone. All of the other managers and his boss will be there with their wives. Imagine being the new guy AND the third wheel. Very uncomfortable being alone while everyone else is enjoying the sand and surf with their wives!

Thanks for the input and suggestions. Whatever is decided, our kids are always priority.

hollyb
06-22-2006, 12:04 PM
Thanks for all the replies. The company function isn't "mandatory circa 1962", but a managers retreat/vacation reward to say thank-you for a great year and all the hard work you do. Bringing the spouses is a bonus, because they realize we suffer when our loved ones are out of town most of the week, every week, and put in weekends as well. His company is a great company! :) All expenses are paid.

Most of the other managers have family that live nearby, or their kids are grown. Both of our parents live out of state, the closest is 600 miles. We never go out, so we have no routine sitters. I am a SAHM, so we have no daycare providers to ask.

My husband is a newly promoted manager, and trying to establish a relationship with his fellow managers. Since each manager lives in a different state, they only meet at business functions, and therefore don't get to know each other very well. He's the "new kid on the block" in a group of managers who have been together for years. I understand his desire to go, and I also understand why he can't go alone. All of the other managers and his boss will be there with their wives. Imagine being the new guy AND the third wheel. Very uncomfortable being alone while everyone else is enjoying the sand and surf with their wives!

Thanks for the input and suggestions. Whatever is decided, our kids are always priority.


Your kids come first. He has to make the choice wether to endanger them just so he go smooze with others. JMHO

Oreo Cookie
06-22-2006, 12:07 PM
I think hiring a nanny is a good idea. You'll need to do the research, but I'm sure you will be able to find someone trustworthy. There are so many wonderful nannies out there.

Another suggestion would be to see if your kids could stays with their good friends family while you are out of town.

Good luck and I hope you can go on the trip!

maggiann
06-22-2006, 12:12 PM
ask the parents of kids at school or at your church or teachers at school for any recommendations. it is not like you have two 4 year olds, with the 13 year old around i would feel safe enough leaving them for a couple days.

msblrobs
06-22-2006, 12:24 PM
How far away is the 'retreat?' Being across the country is quite different from being across town. Is there any way to see what facilities are available at the hotel and then see if you can get an adjoining room for the kids and a nanny? Do you have any friends/siblings/colleagues that would be willing to watch them? I am in management and I travel for business, so I do understand your situation. That being said, I am foremost a mom to three children and I don't know if I would be comfortable knowing my children were with a stranger. Personally, it is too much of a risk that I wouldn't be willing to take. I really do hope you are able to figure something out that allows your kids to be safe in your absence.

pearlieq
06-22-2006, 12:32 PM
Your kids come first. He has to make the choice wether to endanger them just so he go smooze with others. JMHO

:confused3

They are in no way being endangered.

Skatermom23
06-22-2006, 12:45 PM
Thanks for all the replies. The company function isn't "mandatory circa 1962", but a managers retreat/vacation reward to say thank-you for a great year and all the hard work you do. Bringing the spouses is a bonus, because they realize we suffer when our loved ones are out of town most of the week, every week, and put in weekends as well. His company is a great company! :) All expenses are paid.

Most of the other managers have family that live nearby, or their kids are grown. Both of our parents live out of state, the closest is 600 miles. We never go out, so we have no routine sitters. I am a SAHM, so we have no daycare providers to ask.

My husband is a newly promoted manager, and trying to establish a relationship with his fellow managers. Since each manager lives in a different state, they only meet at business functions, and therefore don't get to know each other very well. He's the "new kid on the block" in a group of managers who have been together for years. I understand his desire to go, and I also understand why he can't go alone. All of the other managers and his boss will be there with their wives. Imagine being the new guy AND the third wheel. Very uncomfortable being alone while everyone else is enjoying the sand and surf with their wives!

Thanks for the input and suggestions. Whatever is decided, our kids are always priority.

I have been in your shoes and understand what your going through. I flew my parents down for a long weekend to watch the kids so we could go on a work retreat thing...sounds just like yours. It was worth the cost of two plane tickets for me to know the kids were fine. I don't think I would be comfortable with a stranger watching them. Shoot, I don't even let them spend the night a friends house unless I know the parents a little.

ClarabelleCowFan
06-22-2006, 12:46 PM
:confused3

They are in no way being endangered.

I agree!!

I travel on business all the time and DH is a firefighter who works 24 hours shifts so we have to have overnight babysitting when I am out of town. We have been lucky so far to be able to leave the children with family or with trusted sitters but now that our main sitter has moved away we have been faced with the dilemma of what to do for child care. My kids are older (12 and 7) and I wouldn't hesitate to hire a nanny thru a reputable agency to keep them but I would go thru the steps that I think most parents would first - interview the nanny, check references and make sure she has undergone a background check.

OP - only you can decide the best course of action here. They are your children, not anyone else's, so do what YOU and your DH are comfortable doing.

crisi
06-22-2006, 12:53 PM
Thanks for all the replies. The company function isn't "mandatory circa 1962", but a managers retreat/vacation reward to say thank-you for a great year and all the hard work you do. Bringing the spouses is a bonus, because they realize we suffer when our loved ones are out of town most of the week, every week, and put in weekends as well. His company is a great company! :) All expenses are paid.

Most of the other managers have family that live nearby, or their kids are grown. Both of our parents live out of state, the closest is 600 miles. We never go out, so we have no routine sitters. I am a SAHM, so we have no daycare providers to ask.

My husband is a newly promoted manager, and trying to establish a relationship with his fellow managers. Since each manager lives in a different state, they only meet at business functions, and therefore don't get to know each other very well. He's the "new kid on the block" in a group of managers who have been together for years. I understand his desire to go, and I also understand why he can't go alone. All of the other managers and his boss will be there with their wives. Imagine being the new guy AND the third wheel. Very uncomfortable being alone while everyone else is enjoying the sand and surf with their wives!

Thanks for the input and suggestions. Whatever is decided, our kids are always priority.

This is different than your OP.

DH has a "managers and their wives" retreat coming up next month for 4 days. He cannot go alone. We have 2 children (DS 13 and 4). Both our parents are too elderly to watch them, and other family/friends have plans for the time we would be gone. We cannot take the kids. It would be best "company wise" for us to attend this function.


You want to go. You don't have to go. (This isn't a judgement, you should go if you want and have a great time. These things can be a lot of fun and I think you can make the nanny thing work).

I've worked for three kinds of companies in my career, the ones that leave spouses out of the picture for these things (which I prefer - business functions are business functions, I like my vacations to be vacations), the ones that include spouses optionally (and when they pay your way, it can be very nice, but I don't like it because it assumes everyone is married, everyone's spouse can travel, and everyone's partner is "corporately acceptable" - plus spending that much time with your husband's coworkers in not something I like), and ones where spousal attendence is mandatory (circa 1962) - which is horrible because if you aren't married, your spouse can't travel, or your partner is something other than "corporately acceptable" its a mark against you.

By the way, my boss lives in a different state. Her boss is in a third state. My immediate coworkers are spread across the country. Last night I was on the phone with people from China, Malyasia, Singapore and Thailand. This morning it was Europe. I'm currently managing a project with a team in six states and eight countries. Only a few of these people I've met over six years. I understand working virtually with people and its hard to establish relationships. It will take some time to fit in. The retreat is a great opportunity for him to do so.

ceecee
06-22-2006, 01:52 PM
When I was younger, my girlfriend babysat for a great family (they were well off) and they would pay for their sitter to go to the hotel, etc (once it was a lodge with 3 pools) and that way they could see the kids when they had breaks and the kids would swim, play games etc. at the hotel with the sitter. Maybe that would be an option for you if you have a responsible teenage sitter already.

Chicago526
06-22-2006, 02:22 PM
Your kids come first. He has to make the choice wether to endanger them just so he go smooze with others. JMHO

Leaving your children with a licenced, bonded, background checked and referanced professional is endangerment? :confused3

It's a personal decision to be sure, but I think it falls way short of endangering children!

Took
06-22-2006, 02:29 PM
Leaving your children with a licenced, bonded, background checked and referanced professional is endangerment? :confused3

It's a personal decision to be sure, but I think it falls way short of endangering children!


I agree. Good caregivers are out there! Another place to look is a local college, even a community college. Many professors could suggest potential sitters that you could get to know quite well before the event. Since my DH and I both teach at local colleges, all of our sitters have been former students and ALL were great. You might try a prof. in early childhood education and work from there.

Took

kdtwiss
06-22-2006, 03:20 PM
safe or not - I have a 4 year old and if I up and left him for 4 days he would be a wreck. I think you have to take into account everything including the emotional impact this would have on him. Being a SAHM, he is with you pretty much 24/7 right? That is going to be an awfullt big adjustment for a 4 year old. Quite honestly - even if you went- would you be enjoying yourself at all or just worrying to death about your children? For me I would be soooo worried - it would not be a relaxing retreat at all - but just torture. Your 13 year old would probably just be fine with some no parent time - but your little guy - he will probably have a very hard time. If it is not possible to take them with you and hire someone to watch them so you could attend whatever functions you need to - ask yourself it it is really worth it. 4 Years is not a baby, but too young certainly to understand being left in the care of a stranger for 4 days! Heck, even being with grandma would probably be a stretch. I hope whatever decision you make all goes well!

princessjv
06-22-2006, 05:23 PM
Your kids come first. He has to make the choice wether to endanger them just so he go smooze with others. JMHO

That was not called for! :confused3

This thread is very interesting and eye opening. I am currently a SAHM, however when I began having my wonderful children, I had to work PT. I feel fortunate that I am now able (mentally and financially) to stay home. HOWEVER, should I need to work, or go somewhere, I would feel fine finding the 'best' person who can to care for my children.

OP, from the sound of your original post, you do have some time to find that one 'best person' to care for your kids while you are gone. Will it be hard leaving them?...probably...is it a great opportunity for a break for you and them...YES! Children need to be exposed to different situations in life. A well educated and experience caregiver is a great way for a learning experience for everyone. Who knows, maybe then you will have a great contact for your DH & yourself to use as a sitter on a bit more regular basis. :thumbsup2

As I stated in my original post, I was a nanny. As a former nanny, I have higher standards for childcare than many. If you find that 'one person', who is wonderful, caring, loving and responsible, you will feel much more comfortable leaving! Use your instincts and better judgement, your heart :love: will tell you when you have found the great one!

Don't let some of the other posts make you feel bad for leaving your children. Look at this as not only a time to meet your dh's co-workers, but as a great oportunity to have a little time away.

***Flame suit on***
(To all of the negative responders, I feel sad, that you can't see that there are others who can care for children, yours and mine...Many, who are even better with children than possible you.) :grouphug:

bethyg
06-22-2006, 06:30 PM
PrincessJV:
I agree that the responses were quite eyeopening for me as well. I'm sorry if my OP left some confusion. We would never leave them for just "a meeting". This is a special getaway reward for the managers and their wives. All expenses would be paid by the company. We looked at this as the honeymoon we really never had.

Thank you for the many opinions and responses. I don't feel further posts are necessary for me. I've been flamed enough. Whatever is decided, our precious boys will always come first. They always have.

Moderators, feel free to close this thread. Thanks. :)

Hedy
06-22-2006, 07:47 PM
Your kids come first. He has to make the choice wether to endanger them just so he go smooze with others. JMHO
Wow, somebody's so holier than every one else.