View Full Version : Desperate for your Opinion
10-21-2001, 11:51 PM
Hi everybody, I am new to the boards. My gf and I are going to Disney world for the first time in three weeks. We have been going out for five years, I get along great with her family and vice versa. I plan on proposing when we are in Disney and Ineed our advice on a couple of things. First, my friends and have been debating this for a couple of weeks and I do not know what to do. Should I get the blessing of her parents. Some are saying yes, others no that it's old fashioned. It's not like they would say know I have a great relationship with them, it's just I wanted it to be a surprise for everybody, even my own family my brother questioned me about it when I slipped that I went ring shopping and I denied it to him. Part 2 of my question is any suggestions on how to do it? I had read a couple of posts about gifts of a lifetime. I had emailed them and the only times they have available is in the morning, which really isn't that romantic. HELPPPP MEEEEEE!
10-22-2001, 12:34 AM
I like the idea of asking their permission. Should you do it ? It really depends on all of you. Could you be certain they wouldn't let it slip?
As for romantic ideas... Oh theere are so many. You could make a PS for dinner in the Castle and see if they would bring the ring in a glass slipper (they have the slippers. They serve a drink out of them). You could book an illuminations cruise and ask here during the fireworks. You could find out if you can go to the wedding chapel near the GF if it isn't booked and do it there. I alwasy liked thato ne movie scene (can't remember what movie) where the guy ask every passenger on the plane to hand his girl friend a rose. I don't know if they could arrange it but you could book a character meal and have each character bring out a rose.
10-22-2001, 01:59 AM
My daughter recently became engaged and her boyfriend spoke to my husband prior to giving her the ring (they didn't tell me.... can't imagine why - LOL) anyway, I can remember how important it was to my own dad when my hubby asked his "permission" before we were officially engaged... so, I would definitely vote for talking to your girlfriend's dad (and even her mom, if you think she can keep the secret ;) ).
As far as making special arrangements during the day.... why can't that be romantic? I remember seeing a couple arrive at one of the little covered pavillians along the water next to the castle... there was a table set with wine glasses and two ladies (cm's or maybe someone from gifts of a lifetime???) were hostessing... the girl didn't seem to know what was going on and when her boyfriend got down on one knee and presented the ring I thought I would cry -- everyone in the area cheered and one of the hostess took a picture of the event while the other poured the champaigne -- the surrounding landscape with the castle and rose gardens was just beautiful!
Good luck to you -- whatever you do will be memorable!
10-22-2001, 05:05 AM
No, I don't think it is necessary. I didn't want my husband to ask my parents, afterall, they weren't the ones marrying him! It is very old fashioned, but if you think that she would want you to, that is a different story. Besides, if the parents know ahead of time, they could inadvertantly give it away!
10-22-2001, 07:14 AM
Neither of my fiancees asked permission. One worked out, one didnt. You be the judge. ;)
How about proposing on the beach at the Polynesian at night, witht he castle changing colors in the background? Its so beautiful there!
10-22-2001, 07:29 AM
Both my sons-in law "asked" permission. Really it was more of a heads up, but we felt it was a nice touch. Both our daughters were surprised. The hard part for me was waiting for the phone call to tell us they were engaged.
10-22-2001, 07:41 AM
My husband asked my dad before hand and was scared to death to do so (I AM the ultimate daddy's gril). My dad said he had more respect for him since he did so. Of course now my husband says that he thought he was never going to get away from my dad with all the questions that he asked him before he agreed that it was ok to marry his "little girl"--to make this funny please remember that I was 28 years old lol. Oh well, it meant a lot to my father that my husband did that and I think their relationship grew closer and stronger because of it.
Can't help you with the romantic ideas at Disney though--I haven't been yet. I can tell you more when we get back from our trip in December. :)
10-22-2001, 09:36 AM
If my husband didn't have the coconuts to ask my Father permission to marry me, I would not have married him. It shows respect to the brides family and is a tradition that should be upheld.
No, the parents aren't the ones marrying the guy literally, but he will be a part of that family till the day he dies. or Maybe the guys is just wrong for your daughter. Maybe your family's opinion about your future mate should be important to your decision.
I have been married for 5 years now and would highly recommend it!
Do your girlfriend proud. Be strong, respectful and romantic. Show her how much you love her and all the reasons you want to marry her.
10-22-2001, 01:24 PM
For me, I wonder how old you and your GF are. If you are closer
to 18 years old, I would think it would be essential to talk to her
parents, first. If your GF and you are closer to age 30, it is not
necessary to talk to her parents first, HOWEVER, it WOULD be a
nice touch, anyway.
It is so wonderful that you want it to be romantic !!!!
Lucky Girl !!! ;)
10-22-2001, 05:42 PM
Definitely speak with her parents first! Sure, it is old-fashioned. But, that doesn't make it something to avoid. . . . Perhaps something to embrace, instead.
My husband and my sister's husband both spoke with my father before asking us. Even as sentimental as he is, my dad did not spill the beans in either case. And I too think it has strengthened their relationships with him.
Just do it!
10-22-2001, 07:32 PM
In a way her parents know it is something that is upcoming, they just don't know when. They know we have been talking about it they even offered advice on the type of ring and what to look for. They just don't know it is going to be on this trip.
10-22-2001, 07:34 PM
My husband worked for my dad, and I was 28 yo when we got engaged... I am very independent, had been dating my DH for 5 years, so I really didn't feel it was necessary, and neither did my father... his response would have been, "Why are you asking me, I'm not marrying you." So, for us, it was better all around.
10-23-2001, 11:44 AM
I say ask for permission. I'm a bit of a traditionalist. If you've been dating her for 5 years and you get along great with her family, they should not have any reason to say no. As for ideas on where to do it, obviously Cinderella's Castle is an idea. Maybe at your resort (if it's a Disney resort, or if there's somwhere romantic there that you can do it). Good luck to you!
10-25-2001, 05:14 PM
I think it would be very nice to ask her parents and I think they would appreciate your sincere consideration of them. Explain to them that it is a surprise but you wanted to include them on the surprise.
Second part. Contact Disney and they will assist you with the proposal plan. I would suggest getting a glass slipper from the shop on Main Street that sells all crystal figurines and arrange to have the MK open the park for you and propose in front of the Castle under the stars. I know I would love that. But then, I am a sappy romantic.
10-25-2001, 08:08 PM
Tinkerbell4ever, actually we are going to be in the park after hours with the party, but how can I contact Disney about the glass slipper part can you get me a number?
10-25-2001, 08:10 PM
I don't know what your budget is like, but Disney does offer Engagement Packages. These can also be used for Anniversaries or Special Occasions (which is why I inquired). Here is the info they gave me (prices as of Jan 2001):
What better place to pop the question, “Will you marry me?”, than during your stay at the Walt Disney World Resort. Choose from 8 different Engagement packages to propose to your special loved one in the most magical place in the world. To book one of these romantic, fairy tale Engagement events, please contact the Engagement office at (407) 824-5130.
Engagement Event Packages
Rose Garden Afternoon Engagement $295
Offers a private and romantic setting in the specially reserved Magic Kingdom Rose Garden, near Cinderella’s Castle. The perfect afternoon backdrop for a romantic Engagement. A bouquet of a dozen red roses awaits the couple next to a Victorian style loveseat. The fairy tale proposal takes place, then the newly engaged couple toast the occasion with a chilled bottle of sparkling apple cider, resting in a silver bucket beside the loveseat. A keepsake glass slipper and a tray of chocolate truffles compliment the event.
Rose Garden Evening Engagement $450
Offers all the amenities of the Rose Garden Afternoon Engagement. In addition, enjoy the night sky as it explodes with the perfect backdrop to celebrate the special occasion. The newly engaged couple enjoy a private viewing of “Fantasy in the Sky” fireworks, as they are presented with Mickey and Minnie Wedding ears.
Under the Sea Cruise Engagement $775
Offers a private romantic getaway with a one hour cruise on the Seven Seas Lagoon aboard the “Grand I” 44-foot Sea Ray Yacht. Enjoy a spectacular view of the MAGIC KINGDOM, Disney’s Wedding Pavilion, and many of Disney’s picturesque Resorts. Also enjoy a chilled bottle of Iron Horse Fairy Tale Cuvee champagne, chocolate truffles, and a special keepsake glass slipper. The proposal takes place from the best seat in the World during the “Fantasy in the Sky” fireworks over Cinderella’s Castle. A dozen red roses and Mickey & Minnie wedding ears are given to the couple after the magical proposal.
Little Mermaid Deluxe Engagement $795
Includes all the amenities of the Rose Garden Evening package, plus personalized engraved glasses, and a Mickey and Minnie engraved arch frame. For the final touch of this magical evening, the couple enjoy a chilled bottle of champagne during a romantic limousine ride to the couples final destination from the MAGIC KINGDOM.
Snow White Deluxe Engagement $1295
Includes all the amenities of the Rose Garden Evening package, plus personalized engraved glasses, and an appearance by formally dressed Mickey Mouse. The couple toast the evening with a chilled bottle of champagne during a magical limousine ride to the couples final destination from the MAGIC KINGDOM.
Sleeping Beauty Deluxe Engagement $1595
Includes all the amenities of the Rose Garden Evening package, plus personalized engraved glasses, a special glass Mickey and Minnie heart shaped box, and a personal appearance by formally dressed Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse. The couple are whisked away to enjoy a chilled bottle of champagne during a romantic limousine ride to the couples final destination from the MAGIC KINGDOM.
Prince Charming Deluxe Engagement $1895
Includes all the features of the Rose Garden Evening package, and adds a personal appearance by formally dressed Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse, a favorite romantic song following fireworks, personalized engraved glasses, and a professional photographer to capture the events special moments. The couple toast this magical event with a chilled bottle of champagne during a limousine ride to the couples final destination from the MAGIC KINGDOM.
Cinderella Royal Engagement $2995
Includes all the features of the Rose Garden Evening package, plus a special String Trio performance, personalized engraved glasses, a beautiful Cinderella Castle snowglobe, a personal appearance by formally dressed Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse, and a videographer to capture the events special moments. The couple toast the magical evening with a chilled bottle of champagne during a limousine ride to the couples final destination from the MAGIC KINGDOM.
Possible Compliments To The Engagement Event Packages...
Dozen Red Roses $ 75
Chocolate Truffles $10
Apple Cider $10
Glass Slipper (add'l $10. for name & date engraving) $50
Mickey & Minnie wedding ears set $35
Mickey & Minnie Stemmed Engraved Glass set $60
Limousine one-way with champagne $155
Limousine 3 hours with champagne $300
Professional Photographer $395
Professional Videographer (digital services for best quality) $550
Special or Romantic song on CD system $85
(1) WDW Character at (1) set $550
(2) WDW Characters at (1) set $850
String Trio performance $850
Large Cinderella with Castle Snowglobe $95
Mickey & Minnie glass heart box $30
Additional options not already in packages:
Solo Violinist $250
Additional hour on Yacht $295
Cake (10" round with writting) $50
Mickey & Minnie Wedding Cake Topper $28
Mickey & Minnie Engraved Glass Arch Frame $75
10-26-2001, 09:37 AM
I would contact Guest Services via email or phone. They would have the number to contact.
10-27-2001, 02:59 PM
Yes, I believe it is respectful to ask the parents blessings to marry their daughter. I recently, about 2 months ago, asked my girlfriends parents for their blessings to marry their daughter - and they were extremely happy that I had - I didn't do it for selfish reasons, but their respect for me increased dramatically.
As far as it being old-fashioned. It's not. You do it because it's respectful to the parents, and to your girlfriend (especially if she is really close to her parents).
I would recommend asking the parents blessings on the two of you getting married. Please note, that asking for someone's blessings, is not the same as asking their permission.
10-30-2001, 09:58 PM
My dh asked my dd (we have been married 27 yrs. last Friday). It shows respect. My dd's dh asked our permission as well. It made us respect him more than he showed respect for us. I am really glad he did.
11-03-2001, 05:20 PM
As for the parents question, what about talking just to her Dad first? Can her folks keep a secret? You wouldn't want them to let the cat out of the bag...
As for the ACTUAL question, I heartily agree with CamColt about the beach at the Polynesian... what a spot. However, what does your fiance like to do? Some of the restaurants in Epcot are amazingly romantic (especially at Mexico and Morocco). On the other hand, what about proposing in the Space Mountain rocket car, just before the ride starts? If nothing else, it will be memorable...
Poly 73, 79
ASM, PO, DL etc. since, and counting.
PS Honeymoon at Disney. I did a year ago, and it was spectacular!
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