View Full Version : WW Sunday Meeting Thread- Who told you you couldn't?

03-05-2006, 05:48 PM
One of the things that I struggle with in becoming more active is the fact that, for me I wasn't ever really encouraged to be athletic. I remember doing gymnastics in elementary school- I could walk home afterwards because we lived down the street, but when I began middle school I couldn't do after school sports because there wasn't anyone who could consistently pick me up and drive me home. Plus I came from an Italian family where women weren't athletic, men were. So while my brother took the State and then New England Division titles in Wrestling, I sat on the sidelines and watched. Which got me into great shape for scorekeeping for the Wrestling team while I was in high school, for all four years. While my friend from elementary school went on to compete in gymnastics in high school and then college, I became a lump of inactivity- moving my wrist to record a 2 point takedown wasn't much of a workout.

In my mid-30s I began weight training due to a degeneration of my cervical bones which pinch the nerves in my back. I loved how strong I felt at the time, but I have to admit, all the praise from a personal trainer of how this was the perfect form of exercise for me and that if I put my mind to it and burned the fat I would be in great shape--even through all that there has always been something in the back of my mind telling me I will never be able to accomplish athletic goals, so why bother. And even though I walked the half marathon in 2005 and finished and have the medal to prove it, why do I still feel like I don't really deserve it? I eventually stopped working out completely, due to major life changes and now I'm back with pinched nerves, flabby muscles and the proof that I'll never be an athlete so why bother?

I know I need to work on this. I know that I can have what John Bingham refers to as adult onset athleticism. I have to remind myself that it will only come when I work at it little by little. I have to remind myself that it won't come overnight. And I have to tell myself that men aren't the only ones who can be active and participate in sports activities. When I think of the time I've let go by, it makes me want to cry. I was thinking about all this when I went for a walk this morning and came home discouraged cuz I only did one mile. Well you know what- I did a mile and that's a start.

Do you feel like you can't do something because someone may have led you to believe you couldn't? Do you feel like you won't lose the weight because people have made you believe you can't? I'm starting to realize, whether we believe we can or we believe we can't, we are right.

03-06-2006, 07:12 AM
i guess i think i don't believe that i can TRULY maintain my goal weight, i saw it once for a short while in 2003 and quickly put on about 3-4 lbs just enough that i didn't feel like i was at goal. i never claimed a goal clippie even. i think i've always since HS felt like i had some weight to lose, and mentally accepting that my weight is fine is just not in me. so I tell myself I won't ever be able to lose enough to be a goal and stay there, though i want to desperately

i can't relate to your non-athletic frame of mind. i wasn't involved in sports during school, tried out for cheerleading in 7th grade and didn't make it, i think i did play volleyball but i've blocked that out. i have terrible hand/eye coordination so i was the one who didn't hustle b/c then i might trip or miss the ball and everyone would see me. my activity in HS was lifting 12 oz'ers on the weekends. oopies -- got away with that until i was about 17 y/o and put on about 15 lbs my senior year. yes, my senior pictures show me at one of my heavier weights.

i don't think of myself as an athlete now -- i'm just a 33 y/o mom of two trying to keep my bod in some form of shape. i have a 60 min walk to do this morning on the TM and i'm dreading going. the only thing getting me there is my commitment to the columbus 1/2 in four weeks. i do know that i will feel the workout high towards the end of the time and then it will boost my motivation b/c i'll feel so much better having it done.

annie you did DESERVE that medal -- why are you disappointed with it?

03-06-2006, 08:42 AM
annie you did DESERVE that medal -- why are you disappointed with it?

Not disappointed in it, just don't feel like I deserve it. I don't feel like I earned it, because I know if it weren't for some wonderful friends who told me I could when I truly believed I couldn't, I never would have done it. I didn't do the homework, I didn't prepare and somehow I passed the course. I feel like I cheated off of my friends. Everytime I look at it I feel like it's far more theirs than mine.

03-06-2006, 11:35 AM
((annie)) well what are we going to do about that??? no matter how much your friends may or may not have doing in their training, i have insight that they weren't perfect ;) i'm very proud of you and next january i hope you can share that moment with me...............'cause i'm looking forward to it and the victory celebration afterwards! yee haw!

03-07-2006, 12:32 AM
I feel like I am the only one who tells myself that I can't do it, or that it's just too hard, so I might as well take the easy way and just give up. I mean, you can't fail if you don't try, right?

My mom was always too busy for me to be in sports, and then when I got into high school, it was so competitive, I didn't stand a chance. So, I just adopted the "I'm not athletic" attitude.

Now I wish every day that I had been athletic and involved in sports because exercising is so hard for me, and such a hard habit to get into. BUT- I am trying to get rid of my preconcieved notions about myself. My dh's great uncle started running marathons after battling cancer when he was over 60 years old. He is 82 and still runs (after 2 knee replacements). SO, when I think, oh, I'm too out of shape or it's too hard, I think of Uncle Joe and those thoughts seem silly, because he's more than 3 times my age.

03-07-2006, 02:42 AM
I was never into any type of sports or such growing up. I didn't have any interest in the either. I have thought since HS that my weight could be better but never took the bull by the horn and did anything about it until 2003 when I lost my weight but didn't make my goal and I didn't continue on with my healthy lifestyle. When I lost my weight several years ago, I remember during my loss, my mother making comments that I didn't need to lose anymore (even when I still had 30 pds left to lose). I believe she was in fact jealous of me making the changes to lose the weight. I tried hard to encourage her to join me in my lifestyle change, but nothing worked to get her there with me. I have decided this time around that I am doing this for me and my family, I want to be around as long as I can. I am enjoying the walking that I'm doing and I'm working my way to being able to do some jogging, eventually getting myself to being able to do some running. I know I can, I just need to continue to remember that.

Annie-you do so deserve that medal, you could have not been there at the start and not gotten that medal, but you were there and you have it. Please remember who was right there with you who couldn't walk much for several days for not preparing but I am thankful that I pushed through and you should be too. You will be there this upcoming Jan. better prepared and like OhMom stated, celebrating will be a blast.

03-08-2006, 07:35 AM
i needed to reread this -- just WI today and i'm up a pound maybe a bit more, but i'm not entering anything in my online journal yet. i'm going to hold off until later this week and get back to being able to enter a maintenance. funny thing is i feel leaner, i hope it's just a readjustment thing.

today I will be conscious of telling myself "YES!" i can do this and make that positive thought the normal thought instead of 'why bother?'

03-09-2006, 05:13 AM
How is everyone doing this week on keeping that positive thinking going? I've had a couple of bumps but nothing major. I just keep thinking about how much better I am feeling and how much happier my body is with me.